I Never Looked At You That Way

"But never looked at you that way" But I did, see? How your fingers would linger a second longer when passing me the ketchup, how your eyes would flicker at a new outfit I wore, how you'd make jokes about how no one could possibly date me but still have a hint of jealousy in your eyes every time I mentioned a guy. I never looked at you that way, but maybe I saw what we were doing, how we could never be in a closed space for more than a minute, how our comfortable friendship would suddenly turn awkward glancing at ceilings and tiles, how your nervous breath would raise the hair on my arms every time we accidentally came close, how every single playful fight was a moment of testing how long I could let you touch my hand without wanting to hold you, how you remembered specific colours that looked good on me but roasted me every second that your eyes wandered on my body, we were just fixing mistakes, see?

We were just making sure we're not caught, by each other, by the world, by ourselves, we were just keeping the attraction quiet, so the friendship could be loud and it thrived, so well, until one moment the crystal platonic ball fell, and our feelings scattered all over the floor, how we wanted to hold each other close, how every moment in hiding was a facade too heavy on our burning hearts, so maybe I never looked at you that way before, but I definitely saw, we both did, how our hearts, our skin, our body, our everything just craved to be.