Unknown

Have you ever woken up with your head just banging its walls? I have! Not always but sometimes and those times always makes me question WHAT I REALLY WANT? Though I always feel satisfied and fulfilled, these feelings are only alive when I am awake. After closing my eyes and drifting into the lakes of the subconscious I feel not actually feeling but I see I am not SATISFIED and FULFILMENT is still away from grasp.

After completing 23 years of living on this planet surrounded by humans, humans and humans. Some whom I love, some who love me I still feel something a-gap a-void. I don't know what to call but it's missing. Yeah! Something is missing.

On retiring to bed every night before sleep drifts me off I dream I always!

A man is sleeping behind me with one hand under my neck above the pillow and the other on my shoulder not holding just laying there, while I'm sleeping facing the walls. I haven't seen his face nor I want to but I dream every time, every night with wide-open yet shut eyes.

For me, it's like a lullaby that calms me from today's life. He doesn't exist, yet I imagine, yet I feel and yet I sleep to meet him again.