Pleasing Displeasing

Dear Diary,

I am back with yet another learning for the day.

My friend is from a very traditional family. She has told me about her parent's power struggle from as long as she could remember. Her dad has been the best son all his life and mom has been ruled with fear, with a passion. Now, that her granny is no more she says that she sees a vast difference in the dynamics.

The Queen is free to woo her King at-last as there is no more distraction. The King remains the same though, perhaps still coping with his greatest loss. The Queen is putting all her energy in making the King realize that she wants his attention and approval but his insecurities and habits are not allowing him to acknowledge and relax at all. This led me to introspect on why it is so important to please others? Who told us that our world should revolve around others? Why do people not like it when you take an interest in your personal growth?

I do not want to differentiate between the genders as both have their own compulsions of pleasing the other. Have you ever wondered where this all starts? Of course, we get it in our blood and as soon as we are old enough to grasp things we start imitating our primary caregivers and with all the good values we imbibe we also pick up their shortcomings.

As I hear the Queen operating out of her limitation of pleasing others I wonder if I am also the same. I do not seem to bother too much about other's opinions but I still have to work more on myself.

I am grateful that I have unlearned the "pleasing others" habit and I pray that all of us learn to work on ourselves more than concentrate on others. I am sure this will lead to a high quality of life too. Want to challenge me on this ???