Sleep

Oh, what I give for some sleep,

That wasn't full of monsters,

Demons chasing after me. 

I'd give anything to continue,

Dreaming of you,

The secret I must keep. 

Oh, what I'd give for some sleep,

To never have to wake up,

To someone screaming at me, 

To never have to see,

Those evil brown eyes,

Glaring back at me. 

Today,

It was because of a nap,

That made you snap,

After staying up all week for you,

My tiredness made me weak,

I'm sorry that I fell asleep. 

I can hear her now,

The doctor reminding me,

To stay off my feet,

So my leg can heal,

A pinched nerve is nothing safe,

Secretly I want to run,

Escape out the window,

Flee to safety,

But my injury won't let me,

And the doctor,

Well, she doesn't have to come home with me. 

Even in the car,

You scream and shout,

Telling me when you look over,

"Don't you dare cry,

Don't you dare pout,

How could you ever doubt,

My love for you?"

If only that were true. 

The second we arrive home,

You reunite with your true love,

The couch,

Leaving me to do everything on my own. 

I'm hurt, 

Can't you see?

I am screaming for you,

Begging you to help me,

Why do I deserve this misery?

You fall asleep,

Peaceful and at ease,

Leaving my mind with broken pieces,

I just wish I could find peace. 

Oh how I wish I could sleep,

Maybe then I wouldn't be reminded,

Women are too look pretty,

Don't you dare utter a peep,

Or spread the secrets,

Who would believe you,

You're a lazy writer anyway,

You say all these words to me,

Every day. 

Still, I cling to this pen,

Writing my soul on a page,

Hoping my heart will mend,

And that maybe today you won't,

Be in such a rage. 

With my injury,

I'm caged to this bed,

While you whisper toxicity into my head,

Reminding me to be careful,

To watch where I tread,

Sometimes on the dark days,

I think I'd be better off dead. 

Maybe that's why I pray for sleep,

A place where finally I'm free,

My dreams are the only place,

Your face doesn't exist,

Where I can vanish to without,

Leaving a trace. 

Thankfully you don't see,

The way your best friend looks at me,

Sometimes I think he and I,

Were always meant to be. 

Now in reality,

I have a secret to reveal,

One day this pen will save me,

And you'll be left without a meal,

Won't that be unreal?

Just like you claim my accusations to be,

All while making me believe,

I'm crazy,

I'm so terribly bad,

You never see it,

I'm just sad. 

Despite my soft tone,

And the sweet voice,

Nothing changes your demeanor,

In fact,

I believe my love makes you meaner. 

Oh how I wish I could get some sleep,

Anything to erase the darkness,

Swelling down deep,

Reminding me,

I must bury it,

Sweep away the pain,

Continue this awful game. 

I'm so forgetful now,

I barely remember my name, 

I'm not okay,

In fact, I might be insane,

I'm in so much pain. 

I can't speak,

I can't scream,

No one hears what I'm trying to say,

What I'd give for my pen,

To take me far away. 

Someday,

When you wake up,

I'll finally be able to sleep, 

With someone else holding me,

And I'll never be so alone,

Trapped inside a shattered home. 

Tonight it's getting late,

Despite my pain,

I fear I must go to sleep, 

If somehow I meet you in my dreams,

Take me away,

I'm tired,

I no longer want to stay.