Don't Stay

Sitting here in the dark,

I'm stuck,

Screaming your name,

Wishing the pain,

Would go away,

So that maybe I could stay,

Maybe your attitude would sway,

And I wouldn't feel driven in sane. 

I'm insane,

Lost in the rain,

Theres no escape,

From this place,

I can't unknow your face. 

I'm trapped here,

Lost and alone,

Despite all the kindness I've shown,

Only to remain unknown.

I bleed love,

See it pouring my eyes,

Will it ever be enough to stop the lies,

Or to end my cries. 

I just need help,

Shhh, be quiet you say,

Theres no need to yelp. 

But you're here again,

Tightning the chains,

Saying don't worry,

Soon you won't remember,

Even your own name. 

What do you think this is?

A game? 

Who's to say,

Maybe all your accusations are true,

Maybe I'm the one to blame. 

Yes its your name,

That bleeds from my lips,

Laughing at me,

As I take the hit,

Falling to my knees,

Blood sprinkling out of me. 

I think am I the villian,

You speak or am I just weak,

Too weak to leave,

Due to fear of being incomplete. 

Hit the strikes hard,

Each time again and again,

Until I'm pulling at my hair,

Wishing it would end. 

Maybe all of this should end,

Tie a knoose around my throat,

Maybe then,

You'd see my life is misery,

Only then would it not be a joke. 

Maybe then I could cope,

Hiding under the covers,

Afraid of the monsters in my brain,

That are eating my heart,

Ripping me a part,

Inside and out. 

Why can't you love me?

Why did I deserve the hate,

I gave you everything,

Even put the food on your plate,

Maybe I should've never met you,

For that first date. 

Now the cops are here,

Talking to me,

Hoping I can implicate,

And accommodate for them. 

Surely when you went missing,

There must of been a sign,

Something must of be amiss,

A shock to our community, 

One says,

I wonder if i should tell him,

All the times,

You'd laugh at my rhymes, 

And tell me,

I'm the one committing the crime. 

Its time to go,

Soon the cops will be at my place,

With a face like mine,

The guilt would be easy to find,

But I couldn't let you get away,

With making me miserable,

Not even for one more day. 

I had to have the final say,

Just for today,

After all the accusations you made,

Accusing me of getting the last word,

Right before striking my back,

With a board,

And calling me a whore. 

Maybe now after all these years,

Of secrets and lies,

Behind my blue eyes,

There is the villain,

You created locked inside. 

I tried to ask for help,

But a woman with a voice,

No, shhh...

Be silent. 

Are you sure that happened?

 Just don't make him mad?

At 4 am they told that to me,

Despite the sad eyes,

And a broken mind. 

Find a new place to go to. 

Like he'd ever let me leave,

You're just like me,

Being deceive,

By brown eyes and a warm embrace. 

As I'm standing in the bathroom,

Cleaning the blood off of my face,

Wishing the past could be erased,

And that for once someone,

Could love me,

For once I'd be more than a memory. 

Now I'm here dressed in black,

With sunglasses and long sleeves,

A black umbrella to keep me company,

As the whispers begin,

And the preacher brings it to an end. 

I'm here and you're gone,

And turns out,

It wasn't my fault at all,

Be careful I warned,

Don't fall,

But you did. 

Deeper and deeper,

Beneath the broken boards,

Of a covered well,

So much for making my life hell. 

Your empty words cling to me,

Poisoning my insides,

Maybe after all this time,

In the mess of a broken mind,

I can find peace. 

Now I've come to the end of my misery,

All I can say,

Is the next chance you get,

Don't stay.