The Drunken Moron

"Mission accomplished. It's time to celebrate!" Navy said."

"That's right, tonight we're drinking Cognac until we can't walk straight anymore", Blayze said with a big smile on his face. He couldn't think of something better. John didn't say anything at all. I wonder if he had heard them, probably not. My man was busy observing something important. Something related to his perviness. He was trying to surpass Blayze and someday he will surpass him no matter the cost. The Navy didn't wear the hunter's costume. She was dressed in a black blouse and black shorts. She had a white hat with a black flower on it. Luckily she didn't belong to one of Ray's girlfriends. How many girls does that man have anyway? Probably more than six I think. I don't know for sure, but not less than six. Well, he's getting more and more of them over time. Blayze was walking at a two-meter distance from her( not because of COVID-19). Navy didn't allow perverts to come too close to her, you know. She was literally the only one who like didn't allow perverts near her. Especially one like Blayze. John was walking behind her( at a social distance) and was looking at her bum like there was nothing else in the world to do. Well, she hasn't noticed him, at least not yet. It was nearly midnight and they were walking through the streets of the city in which they lived. The castle was on the top of a mountain and was several stories high. It was the most luxe building in the empire of Ornavier. Monsterhunters lived in the castle in special rooms made for them only. It was silent in the houses and lights were turned off. Only the stores were open at the moment. 

"Hey John, your walking too slow. Can't you walk a bit faster and stop with that thing that you're holding yourself busy with?"

"It always has to be you Blayze. As annoying as ever. And by the way, keep your shitty mouth shot"

Navy stopped walking and turned around.

Right at the moment when I was observing her bum, she turned around. Why now of all time, dam it! "What's wrong, you two?", she asked looking at John. Navy turned red. "Look at me when I'm talking to you and not at my boobs you damn bastard, if you do it a second time. I promise I'll kill you!"

"Well", Blayze said," I'll go on ahead and go take a drink at Uraza".

Navy didn't hear bim at all.

What the hell, John thought. Is he nuts? He's supposed to be my friend and rival for the title of perverted king and now he's leaving me all alone with Navy who has the determination to tear me to shreds and anytime she likes. You were supposed to be my friend and betrayed me. AND NOW I'M ABOUT TO DIE!!!

 

"Take care of yourselves guys, don't worry about me. I'll only be interrupting your chit chat."

Navy was probably going to beat that perv up. If your looking for a crazy violated and absurd chick then Navy is the right one. No wonder she isn't one of the many wives of Ray. 

Blayze put his hands on his pockets and walked away whistling. He was tired and sleepy. The mission he was on had taken three whole days and nights to complete. Not that it was a difficult mission, you know. A pathetic quest to free a few villagers from a goblin attack. He hated goblins and had to deal with them on a mission. Can't the King give elite hunters more advanced quests like slaying a frost or flame dragon? Not that Blayze would be able to complete the mission. The worst thing of all is that he wanted to do it on his own. Well, it was a good suicide plan from him. Hoping to take on a flame/ frost dragon on his own. How pathetic. Believe me when I tell you the mission was boring as shit. Goblins weren't a big threat to people. They were just annoying. The houses of the city were close to each other and were all built the same way. Most of them were wooden and just a few stones. They were painted in black, white, grey and brown shades because other colours like red and green were too expensive for common people in the city. It used to be a big crowd of people on the streets. However, today(Sunday) was an exception. Party's and too big crowds weren't allowed. It was several weeks ago that the right-hand man of the King had forbidden party's and big crowds of people together at one place. Bar, stores and restaurants stayed open during Sunday, even after midnight. He forbid party's because according to him Sunday was a day to rest. There was an exception for monster hunters too(which they didn't like). They are still being ordered around to complete missions on Sundays. There was nothing to do against it if it was an emergency.

On the right side of the street a two-story building was located. It was the bar. The most popular bar in the entire city. Its name he was Uraza the midnight. A mint green building with beautiful doors and windows. The doors were varnished. He heard people laughing out loud and screaming in the bar. Actually screaming and too loud noise wasn't allowed too. Blayze didn't had a problem with it, not following the laws. He once said that trying to prevent violence in the city is pointless after the right hand of the King made the law (his law) officially. A few people sat outside on a bench. One of them was sleeping. That man is nuts, Blayze thought. He probably drank too much. The smell of Whiskey and Cognac was all over the surrounding area. People of Ornavier drank too much alcohol. Blayze had his hunters costume still on after the mission. A completely black suit with leather boots made of thin leather. Someone was singing and playing the guitar. No wonder that man outside fell asleep. The guitar player was not even close to being an amateur. And two psychopaths were dancing. A man stumbled towards him. It was a tall fat man with a big belly snd he was holding two bottles of with apple juice in his hands. "Hey my friend,", he said to him "wanna join us"

"Who is us", Blayze asked. Not that he was interested. 

"I have a gang called the Uraza gang. It's not much of a gang. Just a regular club or something like that. I'm Tonpon. The leader of Uraza midnight!"

Such absurd ideas. Is this man serious, Blayze asked himself. Probably not. The other people in the bar started laughing.

He just called himself Tonpon. Blayze' jaw was literally on the floor and his eyes were as round as ping pong balls. This man is outta his mind. I'm gonna get outta here before he asks me something else. He was a drunken moron and he smelled like Napoleon. He had mixed the juice with it. Blayze wondered how he was standing on his feet after being that drunken. He looked like s two-legged pig drinking apple juice with Napoleon. 

Tonpon put a hand on his shoulder. "Would you like the join us, my friend"

Starting from when was I a friend of a moron, Blayze thought. I was just thinking of escaping the Uraza morons and now I'm stuck with them. Pathetic. "Ok, starting from today I'm a member of the Uraza gang". I just acted like a moron. This man, I mean pig, will turn me into one very soon. He doesn't seem to be much of a human to me. I bWell, I'm in a good mood today so it doesn't matter. 

"Over here, over here", he heard people saying.

They were in a corner of the bar and were all talking crap and shit to each other.

This is the worst day of my life. One drunken moron is more than enough and now I'm stuck with six extra. I'll be one very soon if things keep going like this.

Tonpon looked at his 'gang' and laughed. "This is our newest member!"

The six morons started cheering.

"What should I call him. Let me think". 

Blayze eyes became bigger than before. He isn't going to give me some ridiculous name like his. I wanna get outta here, but this moron grabbed hold of my shoulder like he knows that I wanna disappear from here. Oke, oke. Think of something to say to him so I can get rid of Uraza morons

The pig opened his mouth.

What the f**k. He's really going to name me. There must be shit in his head. I mean real shit. This moron lacks a brain. 

"Here he is, member seven of Uraza gang. His name is Mupa!!!"