Ours is not to question why, ours is to ....
Ours is not to question why, ours is to ....
Jyotsna had always been 'the sunny side up' kind of a person, always saw the glass half full. Very very few things could get her down…and that also momentarily. Her husband always admired her for being like a bright sunflower, perky and bright and no matter what!
Her parents like any other parents before them, lost no time in finding her a 'suitable boy'.The only glitch being (if you can call it that) that he was worlds apart from the milieu she was used to! She was born and bred a civilian and he was from the defence forces - an Army Officer !!
When she entered the army world, her life underwent a three sixty degree change in focus, thinking, lifestyle and ethos.The world of Army is as different to the civil way of life as night is to day !
But she after taking some time( read that as half a year) to figure out what was required of her in this new life, took on the challenge with her usual zeal and enthusiasm! There were so many things to learn, so many things to unlearn ; the dos and the donts;and to add to the woes, a true blue Army officer husband to boot! She quickly realized that her days of cruising through life like a carefree bird were truly over. In this new world, if she had to thrive certain things were expected out of her, a decorum had to be followed, an example had to be set for the other junior wives, duties to be done, and to top it all she was expected to keep an immaculate house as if it was going to be featured in 'Good Housekeeping' at a moment's notice! In short, striving for that elusive five star rating defined her life hereon!
There werepeople judging her every step, silently watching, waiting for that one misstep to start shaking their heads regrettably for the poor civilain who had dared to enter the hallowed realms of the Army world !Yes it's a tough judgmental world out there,as is anywhere, where promotions depend on your work, social etiquette and personal equation. In the army, you marry your husband along with his profession.They ( your husband and his work ) are melded together seamlessly, they come as one unit, they cannot be separated, period!The sooner you understand that the easier your life becomes.
After the initial shock had worn off and life settled into a pattern, she took to being an army wife like fish to water, grooming herself into the role, as countless before her had done.Slowly it dawned on her that a wife plays a very important role in her husband's career, for the going to be smooth.
Along with his professional competence he is also required to project a happy and harmonious personal life. Many a careers have been unmade by wilful wives.Without exaggeration it can be said that, a wife helps a lot in building her husband's career, if not by being proactive, then at least by playing by the rules and not rocking the placid boat.Nowhere is the saying ,"behind every successful man is a woman' encouraging him to succeed' more true than the army.
Very early on, she had promised herself, that she may not become an ideal army wife, but she will prove to be asset to her husband and be an exemplary wife that he expected her to be!and She wanted him to be justifiably proud of her, and she would work towards that , whatever it takes!
So there she was meandering happily through hher chosen path and enjoying the view, most of the times. Sunny, bright, happy times with occasional clouds darkening the horizon; all very usual, in the ordinary life of an Army wife!
Army life is a roller coaster ride, lots of ups and downs (more downs than ups, and she was having the ride of her life. Getting ticked off innumerable times by her husband for the snafus that she consistently made, but cheerily she prodded on! Army is a great leveller. You could be a bright highly educated professional in the outside world, but here you are known less by your achievements and more by his!!
There are many many ups like, partying, outings, holidays at the spur of the moment, picnics, traveling and more, but then, life is not only about excitement; this can at the most be a pause, a delightful pause, no doubt, but still a pause, life is, as we all know, much more than that!
iits not as if, there were more downs in her life than ups. No! but yes, army demands and gets a lot out of you, if you are seriously batting for a good score! That is to say, if your life partner is doing well in the hierarchy and is being seen as the next shining beacon In the coming years .There is then no respite from the duties expected from you, as a wife to help further your husband's career!
You are expected to be moulded in a certain pattern, to fit in; you cannot question, you just suspend your disbelief. The saying which her husband was so fond of saying, " ours is not to question why, ours is to do and die " fits here so aptly, albeit an Army wife doesn't die doing her bit!
She achieved all that and more so life was one bed of roses, with occasional thorns thrown in!
But then, where in the world will you find a perfect life?