One Last Time

             

 

Riya Madan sat on her plush seat with her eyes closed. She could feel the aircraft taxiing on the runway after a not-so-smooth landing and slowly losing its speed. She felt herself flooding up and tears pricking her eyelids. She knew it was now just a matter of time before she would face the inevitable, a situation for which she was entirely unprepared.

Riya lived in Mumbai with her husband Pradeep and their two children. Her daughter was a news-caster with a leading English News Channel and her son was studying to be an architect like her. Pradeep, a Chartered Accountant, was a partner with Ernst &Young Pvt Ltd. They lived in Malabar Hill, South Mumbai and were considered fairly successful in their social circle.

She had travelled to Bangalore today for a task she was dreading. This trip had come up unexpectedly, both in terms of her work and personal life. A meticulous planner, it had thrown her schedule askew, but this was something that she could not put off for any other day. She was still reeling from the news she had received yesterday evening.

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Five years back......

She was in Bangalore as the architect in-charge for a meeting and initial discussions with the client for a city mall that her architectural firm had bagged. It had been a fruitful morning and she left the site with a satisfied smile on her face. Her partner would be happy.

“Hello! I am Sameer Khanna, the promoter of this mall. It was nice meeting you today and I am looking forward to working with you” A polished voice interrupted her thoughts as she was waiting for the ride back to her hotel.

A tall, dashing man in his mid-forties, smiling with a rakish charm stood in front of her. With a quick glance, she took in his well-tailored suit, polished shoes and manicured hands. She liked what she saw.

 “Thankyou. I am glad we are on the same page, “Riya smiled, shaking his proffered hand.

“Are you catching a flight back tonight or you are in our garden city for some more time?”

“No, I am flying back tomorrow.”

“Oh good! Let’s make the most of it then! Have dinner with me?” he asked, his eyes twinkling down at her.

“Ummm” ...she hedged...” Actually, I was ...”

“Hey, we can discuss work too, if you want. Though left to me, I would rather talk about us! Don’t say no. I promise you an entertaining evening.” That endearing crooked smile again.

She capitulated. It was difficult to resist the charm. God knew, how much she needed that one evening where she could escape her reality, just be herself with no agenda and enjoy guilt-free.

They decided to meet at 8’o clock in the lobby of her hotel. He had named a restaurant which was the latest ‘go-to’ place in the city and she marveled at his ability to pull strings to book a table at such a short notice.

The evening was an eye-opener. He was as charming as he looked. A great conversationalist, he managed to draw her out of her cocoon and she found herself sharing her personal life; something she had never done till now with anyone, leave alone a stranger. Of course, the bottle of wine which they downed also helped her lower her inhibitions and open up.

She found herself drawn to him. He was that rare breed of a man who listened to what the other person spoke; interjected and asked relevant questions to keep the conversation going; a person who nudged and probed with sensitivity. His eyes spoke volumes, mirroring empathy and sometimes amusement at the anecdotes that she unwittingly shared. This was such a rarity that she found herself relaxing in his company, in spite of trying to keep her guard up. He gently drew out about her life, her children and her husband, Pradeep.

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Pradeep! As different from Sameer as different can be. Chalk and cheese. Pradeep her husband of twenty-six years, with whom she shared nothing but a name. Hers was a typical story of her generation. An arranged marriage. A ‘suitable boy’ found by her parents; dissolute one or two meetings and her fate sealed. Married into a family diametrically opposite hers. Her parents had never differentiated between their children; both were given equal opportunities, her brother too helped their mother with household work as did her father; but Pradeep, on the other hand, had been raised to be a quintessential Indian son. Born two years after his sister, he was treated as if he was a boon to the family. He was not expected to nor made to do any work related to running a house. All his whims and fancies were indulged to and he grew up thinking that his job was to earn money to run the house and leave every other thing to the women of the house. Coming from a place where everyone chipped in to do their bit, where children were made aware from childhood that privileges come hand in hand with duties, that being born a boy is just a play of gene matching and nothing more; she found her in-laws’ thinking regressive and suffocating. They treated Pradeep with a reverence totally un-called for and he took it as his due. Education sure does not an enlightened man make! Sickened by his outlook, it was an effort to accept him, but by then, there was no going back.

Added to the fact, she also discovered that they had very few things in common. He was a party animal; they were either going out or were expecting friends for dinner. He loved his drinks and weekends went in binging and socializing. Her interests were never considered. She liked spending quiet evenings at home; reading or maybe just relaxing with the children. But in his scheme of things, only hen-pecked husbands listened to their wives. 

He wanted her to give up her career. He was earning well, wasn’t he? “Riya, I just don’t understand you...why can’t you be stay -at-home mother like my mom? Go to kitty parties, manage our home and enjoy life.”

The inevitable happened. It had started with bickering, erupted into major fights, led to sullen silences and finally indifference. They drifted apart; divorce was not considered as they co-parented their kids and it would have broken their hearts. So, like innumerable women of her generation before her, she too resigned herself to her fate and did not rock the boat. Nobody could have guessed seeing them that they barely exchanged a word when alone. The ‘happily-married couple’ charade continued and it suited them both to keep up the pretence.

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Sameer had burst on her horizon like a cloudburst, drenching her in his love. To put it simply, she fell for him like a ton of bricks! He was a refreshing change from Pradeep. Polite, courteous, attentive to his partner’s needs and a great conversationalist to boot. He had a cheeky sense of humour and she found herself laughing spontaneously, more often than not when she was with him. She enjoyed his company and wanted more. Being with him, she felt alive.

She still remembered their first kiss. It was some months after they had met. At one of their site meetings and dinner that had followed, she had drunk more than her usual and had become a bit tipsy. Swaying to the music playing in her mind, she had waved an airy goodbye. Concerned, he had insisted on dropping her to her room. She sensed a change in the atmosphere as she opened the door and turned back to look at him. Sameer was gazing at her, his face mirroring the longing she felt. Drawn by a force beyond her control, she moved closer to him only to find Sameer pulling her in a tight hug. He bent his head and she arched instinctively, reaching up to him. His lips touched hers and he kissed her hungrily, exploring every bit of her mouth. She ran her fingers through his hair, pulling him even closer. They devoured each other; their love bursting forth like a volcano waiting to explode.

There was no going back after that. They had spent an ecstatic night together. She had a desultory relation with sex. With Pradeep, it had been all about him. Sameer, on the other hand was a considerate and expert lover. His gentle touch aroused her to climax; his hands playing havoc on her body and leaving her gasping for more.

They longed for each other and lived for the moment when they could be together. Distance made no difference. He travelled to Mumbai, whenever he could. Like two adolescents, they grabbed every opportunity to meet. To keep it away from prying eyes, gave it an extra edge. Living together was never an option, given that they both had responsibilities. Though his situation was different—his wife Saloni, had been involved with someone else before their marriage and had wanted out— he had got his son’s custody, after their divorce. They knew that they could not hurt their children, come what may.

“Riya, I love you. But you have a husband, for whatever he is worth and your children. I too have responsibilities though my baggage is less. Let’s not upset the cart for everyone’s sake......let’s continue with the status-quo. We will meet whenever we can. Not an ideal situation, I know but I am happy with these little morsels too....as long as we are together forever!”

Riya had frowned. “But I want to shout from the rooftops about our love. I don’t want to hide it!”

He had drawn her close. “Darling, let’s not become greedy. Let’s just enjoy the present and be happy we found each other. Let’s hope we have a long time together. I can’t imagine life without you now. Promise me, you will outlive me. “

“Sameer!! Don’t even go there. How can you even say that? I don’t want to live if you are not a part of my universe.” Their love had been waiting to happen. He had made her want to smell the roses on the way! He made life beautiful. He made life worth living. She shuddered at the thought of them parting ways, whether in life or death.

But this got them thinking. What if one outlived the other? He or she could not even attend the last rites, as nobody knew about them. No last glimpse? No final goodbye? That was too heartbreaking to even contemplate. How could she not be there to bid him adieu?

“Hmmm...........why don’t we each write a letter with explicit instructions for our sons to open only after our death? We can tell them about our love and leave instructions to contact the other person and inform either you or me as the case may be about the final rites and the funeral? This way we can be there for the final goodbyes?” Sameer suggested thoughtfully.

She mulled over it and reluctantly agreed. The thought of not being there to see him in his final moments was too dreadful even to contemplate. She knew, he too would want to be there if the circumstances were reversed and anyway it was a long time off ....and who knew what the situation would be at that time?

***********************

Present...

The voice over the intercom announcing deplaning jerked her to reality. She had reached her destination. Gathering her handbag, she took a deep breath and prepared herself to meet the person who had come to receive her at the airport.

Rohan. Sameer’s son. Sameer had suffered a massive heart attack at the golf course the day before and had been declared ‘brought dead’ by the time the ambulance had reached the hospital. Her Sameer, her love; was gone and she was here to be with him one last time.

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