Dearest Kurt,3 mins 94 3 mins 94
In all of the years ever since you and I met...
and I am pretty sure that you probably agree with me when I say that we have literally been through what most people are able to go through a lifetime without having to experience or witness (between the both of us) and we have seen far much more than that.
We have seen the good. We have seen the bad... And we have also seen the ugly, too.
I just want you to know that I still love everything about you and I need you to know that nothing that you have ever said to and about me and that nothing that you might have ever done to me or in life in general... Could EVER make me love you any less. Because I know you; I know how weak you feel. I know how you do not feel deserving of any love and sweetheart, that is just not true at all.
I know that you are scared to receive the love that you deserve (I am partly to blame for that) and I also know that you are scared to also give very much love away (since you have given so much of it to me).
It is a shame though because I have seen the love that you are capable of. I am not even sure how a heart as big as yours is even humanly possible and still, you continue to hide it from the world and you run from it, as well.
But dear, I hope that can both stop running and hiding our true feelings for each other.
I’m here to tell you that you don’t have to run. You don’t have to be ashamed of it. You are the easiest person to love. You are so charming and charismatic, people can’t help but to love you. You’re surrounded by it, yet you remain blind to it.
I’m starting to think my life‘s purpose, the literal reason for my existence, is to show you how loved you are. Sure, there are things I’m good at, but the thing I’m best at is loving you. If there were Olympics for the intensity of love, I know I’d win by a landslide.
Yes, I know we were toxic for each other. I know we didn’t try hard enough to make it work, or maybe we tried too hard. Maybe it’s not supposed to be this difficult. Maybe two people aren’t supposed to compromise who they are for love. But when you have a love as intense as ours, you’re willing to do anything for it. You’re willing to sacrifice everything to keep the one person who made it all seem worth it.
Even on the days when I don’t want to love you, I do. Even when I’m screaming at the stars, telling whoever is up there to take away this feeling, it never goes away, it never even dims. This is the love I’ve waited my entire life for and the life that exists between you and me is the only thing I have a desire of keeping and holding onto.
I’m not asking you to let me come back to you and I am not asking for you to open up your heart back up to me again, either.
But what I am telling you is that I would... If you would just ask and I want you to know that you will be glad that you did, I promise.