Within Me

How do I find myself in this mess? 

I cannot recognise myself anymore, 

The more I try to search for Self, the more I lose my individuality… 

And if you ask me to describe my Self, 

I won't know where to start from, 

But I'll still try and say, 

That I am a red passionate flower, 

But as soon as these words will leave my mouth, 

I will see the blue, orange, yellow, pink and black blooming within me… 

So I search further and dive deeper, 

And lose myself more and more, 

It goes on forever, 

Me falling into the depths of the unknown. 

If I say that I am the moon, 

Then I'll inevitably be embracing the hollow scars, 

The sun at my forehead reminds me that with the calm of the moon comes the fire that lights it. 

I look around myself and try to find something, 

Anything, that could describe my existence, 

The trees! 

But oh there were so many, of so many beautiful forms, which one was I? 

The sky! 

Infinite and blue, or black? Or orange? Or reddish? Pink, violet, golden or purple? With stars, or without? 

There's a rhythm to things they say, 

And what is a part of me will dance to the same music, 

So I listen, 

I listen to a song without a voice, 

It overwhelms me, for now I could see,

It was me, it was me, all around me, it was me. 

The golden rays that touch your skin at dusk,

The soft glow that fills your heart at dawn,

The unending darkness in between and the blinding light of day...

It was all me. 

I wanted to be the bright, warm flame, 

But was terrified when I discovered the cold within, the darkness within, 

I learned to embrace it too. 

I was the words that you spoke and the silence in between, 

I was the success, the failure and the hesitation in between,

I was the emptiness and fullness, the half filled will, 

The beauty, the beast, the strong and weak, 

The sky, the earth and galaxies beyond reach, 

The planets, the stars and the vacuum in between, 

The pain, the sorrow, the happiness and bliss, 

All colors of heaven and hell…

The dark and the bright alike,

And everything seen and unseen. 

What am I? How do I tell you? 

When everything around danced to the same rhythm? 

The good, the evil, the one in between,

It was me, it was me, all around me, it was me. 

I am the lazy mist that covers the sleeping world,

And the strong wind that softly blows it away,

Fog of confusion and the guiding light that pierces through,

I am the actor and the play,

The sailor and the sea, 

If the calm waves formed my soul, so did the deadly storm,

The past, future and present, 

The God and the Devil, 

Creation of Life and the will of death, 

Everything that I could sense, see or feel,

It was all within me, 

And I was within all. 

So I blend yet bloom through my heart and soul, 

I am a little of everything that I have known, 

A little of you, a little of me, a little of them,

And everything else. 

A flower is blooming within me,

It dances to the unheard song, 

The Universe is smiling at me, 

Everything's that's a part of me doesn't have to define me, 

I'll choose my path and find my own destiny,

In a world that contained me, I contained the world too,

It was me, it was me, all along it was all me.