Friends With Benefits

For letting him hold me naked

I removed a few skinny layers of mine

Then I got in bed with him

And he cuddled me immediately

I never asked him 

How he felt kissing me

Maybe it was cruel on my part

I didn't stir him the way

He stimulated me

One kiss was enough to close

All the doors of love

I wanted to explore

And my heart crumbled

Exercising empathy

Will I ever be able to show

The passion I'm capable of?

What saddens me?

My rudeness hides my likeness for him

Many a times he rode the bike

With me sitting behind

And you won't believe!

I couldn't lift my fingers

To reach him

I won't let my heart 

Go soft and easy on him

There's something unnerving

About his sexual side

He is a queer, for sure

Was I petrified?

I was a stranger to myself that night

I was the one who wanted it

Maybe I was the initiator too

But I won’t lie next to him again