Who Would Be The King

The star of the East with gymnastic capabilities became the man at the moment. He had done some deft somersaults and got rid of some bugs but retained his chair. He became one with a mission mode and wanted to reduce the saffron brigade to just 56 MPs in the next election. The opposition had so many leaders aspiring for the post of the PM it put the ruling party in shame. The ruling party had only one rhetorical question to ask every time “if not him who else? The questions were who would unite the opposition and what would be the magical seat sharing formula and who would occupy the throne.

The game theory professor with leftist leanings pondered over the problem. How to make it a win-win for the opposition candidates. Opposition had a plethora of choice of leaders with big egos. That was the problem. Each were a king or a queen in their own state. But beyond their state they were almost a zero. He looked at the past history and thought of two candidates from the south who made it to the top. Both were relatively low profile and one made it in history by bringing about economic reforms unknown to the nation. The economic reforms brought forth choices in plenty for the citizens. Like the opposition leaders there were plenty of choice for the consumers in every aspect of life; be it cars, clothes, white equipment and so on. The professor decided to pose the problem in the next class. His students were bright and one or a group of them could offer an out of the box solution.

So, the professor presented the problem and announced a special prize for the solution. He asked them to divide themselves into small groups so as to facilitate a better discussion among themselves. One group looked at the problem in a psychological view and presented ways to deal with many egos. But the professor felt the solution was no go. Another group talked of proportionate representation. The party with the largest MPs would have the right to have the candidate for PM. Though it was democratically correct the professor wasn’t satisfied.

Another group suggested that it was the grand old party that should have the leadership at the helm. Professor ruled it out as regional satraps would outright reject it.

Finally, the last group came for presentation. Professor was desolate but when the group made the presentation, his hope flickered like a candle. This group suggested that there be 7 candidates representing the major parties who have a stake in rotation for a period of 9 months. The last candidate would rule for six months but have the privilege of leading the coalition for the next election. The first one to rule would be from the party that has the largest no of MPs. There would be a post of deputy PM that would be created and the next candidate in waiting would occupy this position. Once a candidate completes his/her prime minister ship he/she would become eligible for a cabinet position to be decided by the next PM. The formula presented was simple enough as to be called as Occam’s razor. In addition, the formula was such Sherlock Holmes would approve of this for the simplicity. Considering the intellectual wealth in the opposition Professor felt that this would be the one easily understood. No complications of region, qualification, history or geography. Of course, it presented a first mover advantage to the majority party candidate. He/she could end up manipulating the system to his/her advantage. That was part and parcel of politics thought the professor.

When the professor presented the formula at the opposition conclave the moment turned out to be epiphanic. A hush fell at the conference hall. Soon some one from the audience started clapping and everyone followed. Every one present realized they have hit the nail and no one could think of a better solution. The psephologist present there quickly did some calculations then and there and announced that the coalition could get 60% straight away. Every one shouted defeat to the saffron brigade.

A man unseen rushed out to the bathroom and occupied a cubicle and dialled a person known as Motabhai and revealed the news. Motabhai started sweating profusely and rushed to the leader’s chamber. This was bad news indeed.

The leader agreed with the preliminary assessment of Motabhai and suggested a brainstorming at meeting be called with select people: NSA chief, foreign minister, Defence Minister and ORSS (Orange and Red Social Service) chief. At the meeting the FM quickly took charge and brought a black board and a piece of chalk. He drew up two columns. First column he called it as issue and then the second dividend. He wrote temple first. The meeting opined the issue cannot give any more mileage. So, he wrote zero against the dividend column. Then he wrote language. Every one said only in cow belt and in other places, it can evoke negative reaction. He wrote negative against the dividend column. Minority bashing, he wrote as third. Yet again, some one said it will be a double-edged sword. People would call us desperate. Not a vote gainer. He wrote zero against the dividend column. When he said economics, the leader reacted sharply as no go. It has been our Achille’s heel. All agreed. Yet again he wrote negative against it in the dividend column. Employment received the same reaction. Highways he wrote next. Do high ways win us elections? ORSS chief asked sharply. Nobody said anything. FM wrote zero against the same. By now the group was losing hope and becoming desolate. The leader said perhaps we have to bank on nationalism, national security. DM asked another Pulwama you are suggesting to pull? “No, perhaps something this time with the cooperation of Chinese” replied the leader. Motabhai asked “what do you have in mind ji?” Leader responded in a low voice and expanded his idea and finally said don’t write it down. Everyone was quite shocked and wasn’t sure if it would work. But who had the guts to bell the cat? Meeting dispersed quietly.

The opposition was in full josh. They announced a yatra and called it Bharat Jodo. One of the leaders suggested lighting up a torch ala Olympic style and keeping it alive during the entire yatra. Every one liked the idea: symbolic as light leading from the darkness. Yatra began in full scale. Each of the aspirant led the yatra in their own state. Rest of the pack followed him/her. Their main plank was bhatop (Bharat todo party) hatoa.

It looked like opposition had an inkling to the secret meeting of the ruling elites. They raised the very same issues in their public meetings that the elites failed to answer convincingly. The scion of the dynasty even predicted aggression from foreign forces aka Pulwama style at the appropriate time to mobilise public support and sympathy for the ruling party. He pre-empted a strike of that kind by announcing that the coalition would be ready to sit across and dialogue with the foreign forces and work out peaceful and permanent solutions. His announcement reminded one of ‘panchsheel principles’ by his great grandfather.

Bharat Jodo was going on strongly as if bonded by Fevicol. But the leader not the one to cow down blew the election bugle. Battle lines have been drawn.

I was tossing in sleep disturbed by the dream and not knowing how to end it. If wishes were horses, I would be riding a chariot drawn by many dark horses. Then I heard the door bell ringing insistently. I forced my eyes to open and staggered to the door.