Were You A Distraction?

"let's go for a walk! "

"noo... I'm feeling lazy"

"seriously? You know, you can't feel lazy because you are lazy. "

" how that is justified now?"

"see, suppose if you're an idiot how can you feel 'idiot', hence likewise my previous statement about you is completely valid."

"OK fine. I know I'm lazy. "

" and I know a walk could cure all your laziness. Now, let's go"

He hesitated but seeing my puppy face finally agreed and said. "Ok fine"

And then we went out on a walk. It was 8 pm and our locality as usual was echoing with horns blaring loudly, a group of uncles at their fifties discussing politics, and people crowding the grocery shops and vegetable vendors. We walked ahead of this hullabaloo and reached into a deserted lane lined with few streetlights and trees.

"isn't it too spooky here to find peace?"

"shut up! It isn't spooky at all. It's so refreshing and serene here. "

"really? "

"yeah! "

And the whole time we had had our walk, I wanted to tell you but couldn't that you're where I find peace. I kept looking at you, and you looked at me, smiled, and then looked down. I kept talking to you and you just 'hmm'ed. I wondered how lazy you're to not enjoy a peaceful romantic night walk. 

But now, being able to connect the dots between your weird behavior then, and the way you silently walked off from my life, I realised I was wrong. 

You were not lazy; you were just tired of my stubbornness in certain things. I tried to understand you and you expected to do that without you telling me anything. You kind of expected me to understand you non verbally. And I failed. 

Initially, I started blaming myself for the failure of this relationship, but as it is said you can't clap with one hand. Then I asked myself, do you ever tried to understand me? My perspective about love and being in a relationship? We both were on the same page then.

We are walking on different paths now and I'm sure you would've found something moving and exciting in your life. As far as 'I' am concerned, I've discovered a whole lot of things such as how if we both would have altered a bit and blended ourselves then we would have been together now. Moreover, I found myself in its whole form. 

And as I walk alone in the same deserted lane we together used to walk, I felt I haven't had enough of serenity then as I'm having now. I can feel the beauty of the surroundings more. Slowly, I realize maybe you were a barrier between me and peace. Maybe you were just a distraction. Or maybe I failed, rather we failed to absorb the serenity together.