To Make Right Of Wrong...

The hustle of life didn't show up enough to let me know how soon I turned somebody's wife, somebody's daughter in law and somebody's something in relation.

It seems like just yesterday, I was with my friends in college...I don't know what made me agree for marriage at the age of eighteen, I don't know what made me overlook what marriage seems like otherwise. What I call myself for this hastily taken decision is 'A moron of a lifetime', which undoubtedly I am. 

Well, happened is happened....my kitchen, my cleaning, my other never-ending duties consumed the next nine years of my life. Through these nine years, the only duty I cherish is that of a mother. Becoming a mother at twenty,

in the twenty-first century,

 in an urban setting, it seems a little absurd but that's the first right of the wrong of my life.

But 'happily lived ever after', does not fit into the practicality of life...soon I did not even feel like holding my baby in my arms and was soon on antidepressants, on the advice of a psychiatrist.

Wow!!! The last thing anybody would want for them...

My mother, the pillar of my life, my dad my actual backbone and my brother, our family's recliner in disguise......were for my rescue.

After battling what the doctor called it, the post part depression, which I was later told of.....but I knew it was more than that.

The constant thought process is the natural nature of mind, but constantly battling endless self-contradicting thoughts are suicidal. They are the perfect ingredients for disharmonious mental health. When mind, being central to human thoughts is negative...how can anything positive reflect out of it.

Just the same questions were pondering in my messed up mind....why did I get married so early, why did I not get to enjoy my college days, why did I get into so, so many responsibilities this early....why, why and why? More and more whys followed by.......

The end result was fights, depression, anxiety and all negative thoughts one can imagine......

All wrongs at a time, in one, go and all partying hard in my head, making my life as lousy as possible. All this was a part of my nine-year-long journey. 

 

As Jonny Walker quoted, "keep walking", that's what I did. 

One day, as I dropped my son to school like I did every morning, my eyes caught the attention of these women who were walking hurriedly, dressed well with handbags. They looked not much education but we're showing up as a dedicated workforce. Not that I had not noticed these women earlier but that day as I went back to my kitchen. I pondered over what's wrong with me, the second right of wrong.

I had qualified my intermediate in science and was in the first year of undergraduate course when I got married. With this comes in the most important role of my husband, who moved around a lot, to find me a correspondence college to complete my graduation, much to the dissenting of others in the family. 

Soon, I was happy to see a graduation degree certificate with my name. This persuaded me further and I completed my Master's degree in Education. As I was tutoring my son at home I found my fetish towards teaching and there I was.... finally realizing that teaching is my forte. Without wasting any time I started applying to nearby schools and in a span of about a month I received my first call for the post of a teacher. I again had to battle it out to put my foot out of the house to work. But it was worth it. The third right of the wrong of my life.

In years that followed by I completed another Master's degree in History, along with all those never-ending house chores, but I had the zeal and this unknown enthusiasm to deal with both the aspects of my life. Working in the kitchen all day and yet staying awake to write assignments late in the night, gave me a new perspective on the routine of my life.

 Having a double post-graduate degree might not mean too much for all but for me, it is my lifetime achievement, as it came with a lot of struggles and sacrifices.

While learning History one of the many things that I realized was, be it a country, a civilization or a personality.....all had to undergo stages of transformation. All had to defy the odds to get what they truly want and deserve.....The biggest barrier to the journey of achievement is our own minds. If you feel you are over even before you have started....you are for sure over. But, if we can change our mentality, we can change our destiny...... which is right of any wrong.....