Love Of Tomorrow

This is the most amazing moment one can feel. Some have already found the love of their life and some are still waiting for someone special to come into their lives.

For me, love is not just a word, it’s that beautiful feeling, an emotion, a bond, an attachment, trust, and faith that two souls and hearts share. It’s a promise that doesn’t fade away even in the darkest days.

Sometimes, meeting a new person for the first time and at that first glance, our heart can feel that special connection, can feel that special feeling whether we’re going to meet with that person in the future again or not.

I’ve never gone through the feeling of love, but this feeling changed a year ago.

It all started with a random friend request I sent her on Instagram. I still don’t have the idea that I sent her that request. But there’s an old saying that when destiny has decided something for you, then it tends to happen.

But on the same hand, when a few things are going accordingly, then they might hurt you in the coming time.

However, the friend request got accepted by her, but then there were some weird feelings like how to start the conversation and what to say or ask.

But as everybody knows what has happened , so while holding the so-called weird feeling and holding that fear in my heart, I sent her that so-called message “Hi”.

A day passed but there wasn’t any reply from her side, but I would believe she accepted the request. Then she would reply.

The wait went a bit long, a couple of days passed but there wasn’t any reply.

Before I almost forgot or gave up that feeling, she messaged me.

Then, slowly at the speed of a tortoise, our conversation started.

But somewhere we both had the fear, we both were not that open with each other.

Fear of talking to a stranger with just a random friend request sent by the boy, Talking to a stranger made both me and her quite less talkative because for her, I was a complete stranger and she was a complete stranger to me. We didn’t know much about each other, as we didn’t talk much, we were unaware of each other’s nature and each other’s likes and dislikes.

We had only seen each other in the picture that we had on social media. It was also a strange thing for me to talk to a girl whom I hadn’t seen or met and talk to her in today’s fake world, but having the belief that she was not a fake, there was a beautiful feeling in my heart. While talking to her, there was trust and faith in my heart. I started feeling comfortable with her that I never felt before.

But slowly our conversation stopped. She was still unclear in her thoughts whether she should talk to me or not.

But just after a few days, I received her message again and this time she started the conversation, but with complete trust, slowly our messages turned into an Instagram call and then into a video call.

As time passed, we both started talking about each other, we both started sharing our day, our ups and downs, our happiness and sorrows, our smiles and tears.

As more time passed, we shared a bond of a strong friendship, the bond that attached us, the bond that made us so much closer to each other.

We shared a beautiful connection and became so much closer that the first person starts the sentence, the other person completes it.

And the most amazing part of our bond, of our friendship, is that we still haven’t met each other, we have only seen each other in photos, or a video call, but then we also trust each other completely.

Our long conversations on call brought us much closer.

We both wish our bond would become stronger and we will never fall apart.

And nothing can break us or their friendship.

Trust, nature, respect, and understanding. These are what made us so much closer to each other.

But as time passed, our friendship turned into love. For me, it’s not just an attraction, but it’s pure love from the deep of my heart and soul.

What brought us closer was the care and trust that was built between us. I never felt the way I started feeling before when I was with her. I also had a few female friends and I also met with a few people before, but I never felt that feeling or touch with anyone else that I started feeling with her. I still remember when I was coming from somewhere and I was waiting to board my flight and it was already midnight. A girl who used to sleep at 11:00 pm was awake and my flight got delayed. It was 3:00 am and she was still with me at that time, I felt the love I had in my heart. We both used to feel relaxed and forgets any tension and any problems, and after talking with each other we used to find the solution to our problems just like that.

Then it became like a daily routine for me and for her, by the start of the day, we were like taking every single moment and reminding everything, by the start of the day we tell so many things like we started feeling that neither me nor her ever felt the things like that before and in fact we ourselves doesn’t notices such things and we ourselves doesn’t care like that before.

I used to remind her about her health, to get fruit, spectacles, an umbrella and such other things, because these were the things she forgets every single day. Some days it was her spectacles, other days it was something else. I used to make her feel good when she was sick. I used to stay awake up till the time she didn’t sleep. I started taking care of her small things and I used to stay awake for her when she was late or got busy with something. We both used to wait for each other’s work to get over so that we could ask about each other’s day and share it.

We were and we are still so attached, like by messaging we can get an idea what’s wrong with the other person and why the mood is off.

It’s not just a coincidence, it’s not a fake story, it’s a real story and when she tells it to any of her friends or I tell any of my friends, they don’t believe it. They can’t believe two people who don’t meet each other, who only met a few months ago and saw each other on video call or photos, share such a strong and lovely bond and are in love with each other.

I also told her about my feelings for her many times and it’s not just love that I talked about my future with her, but if I talked about her feelings, she wasn’t clear in her thoughts in the beginning. She knew that we had some special connection, but she wasn’t aware what feeling was it.

But there’s an old saying that when everything is going accordingly, then some news is waiting for you that might hurt you.

And it happened. If I talk about her point of view she also used to think in the same way I used to think. In the beginning, she was confused, but later, when she gave herself some time to figure out that feeling she has for us, she found out she also feels the same way I feel, she also sees a future with me. But we used to think.

Yes you guys read it right, we used to think that way, as there was no hurry for any of us, but even after that, neither I nor her proposed to each other, we never got into the relationship. It was surely something, it was surely love, but when the other person doesn’t respond to you in the same manner, when the other person keeps her mind dicey then things surely get complicated.

For her it was something. For one moment it was love , for one moment she was thinking about us, she was thinking about settling down with me in the future, but the second moment she changed everything, she left everything to destiny. I know meeting with each other was written, but sometimes we also have to think. We can’t be dicey, we can’t just play with feelings of others.

There’s nothing like she is not interested in us, there’s nothing like she started hating me, but I feel like that for her it was just an attraction, but for me it was pure love.

But we cannot force anyone to feel in the same way we feel for them. If I talked about myself, yes, I was completely sure till the moment she didn’t change her mind, till the time she wasn’t that dicey, I was completely sure that I could see my future and my life ahead with her, but the moment she stopped thinking about it I also stopped thinking about her.

If we love someone with our heart and soul, then we get the pain in return and I felt that.

However, we’re still good friends and I want to remember her as a good person and as a good friend of mine.

I know she’s still dicey, but for me, the love I had in my heart, the feelings I had for her, I put a full stop on them and I don’t want to think about those feelings again.

I don’t know what game destiny is playing with us, why we met, or why we came into each other’s lives, but I’ll say I put my efforts in a lot, I tried a lot. If destiny has finally decided that I have to let her go, then nobody can do anything. Maybe Destiny will let us meet each other, because maybe not today, but someday we’ll have a future. Maybe for me she’s the person whom I can count on for my life, maybe love something for her. She can count on me for her life. Destiny brought her into my life and now I think I have to let her go. It happens sometimes when we love someone by heart, we have to let that person go. But she’ll remain a beautiful chapter in my life.

We’re good friends and I want to remain like that.

But a couple of months before even this whole situation had changed, I came to know that being dicey wasn’t the real reason. She was dicey, but I came to know that for her I was just a distraction. For her, I’m just an option, where, if she finds anyone else, then she can choose me or else she can move with someone else.

And this is not what I’m saying from my own imagination, this is what I came to know because she told me that.

She even added that I’m just a distraction for her. She also said that if there’s no other interaction with someone else, then she can think about us. She doesn’t want to discuss the future now, she doesn’t want to discuss about settle down now.

It was the hardest time for me to believe that the person to whom I was so much devoted is now acting like I don’t even exist for her. We used to plan for our future, but now the whole world of mine has changed. Because the person who was my world had now turned out to be a stranger, because for her I was just an option, I was just a distraction.

Even after knowing that I’m putting in my hundred percent of effort, she used to call me her supporter, her motivator a lot. I was in the delusion that the words that she is using are not coming from her heart, she doesn’t mean it. She is only using such words because behind it there was her motive, there was her work that was hidden that she wanted to be done by me.

When I came to know everything, the world for me had stopped. I couldn’t believe in myself how the world can be so cruel.

Is it so easy for her to forget everything, is it so easy for her to just neglect all the efforts, sacrifices, love, care, trust and faith that I showed just because, for her, I was a distraction, just because for her I was just an option, it doesn’t mean that I also considered her as an option, no it’s really not.

I always loved her with all my heart. If she cried, I wiped her tears. If she was in trouble, I always helped her. Whenever she needed my help, I was there.

But she turned her back after her motive or work was done with me.

How can someone act like an angel and turn into a stranger?

I always gave her my priorities, it doesn’t matter if I was busy doing any work or not, but I never forgot about her, as she always talked to me whenever she was getting bored and wanted to pass her time.

These kinds of people will never understand if they do something like that. Then it’s not easy to forget every single memory of the time we spent with them because I was real and had pure feelings for her, whereas she was only playing games with me.

Now, if I talk about what kind of love I expect, then trust me, there’s not a kind love.

Love is love, complete love, without any hidden secrets, without any hesitation when me and that special someone can share our thoughts, can share our feelings, our time, our love and sorrows, happiness, where I can trust her completely and she can trust in me. Even when the whole world turns its back on me or on her, but our trust, our support, our hand should always be with that person holding their hand and telling each other everything will be fine. Don’t worry, I’m with you.

If I talk about what love will be like and what it’ll be like, then I would say if I find the love of my life and even for her, I’m also the person that she was looking for, then I want both of us to have trust. I want both of us to have belief, faith, respect, care, affection, loyalty, time and attention.

Even if I don’t have anyone, I want her to be that person on whom I can count on and not just for that time, but for my whole life, because we all have that one person on whom we can count on because it doesn’t work with others and it shouldn’t work.

And I will be that person on whom she can count for her whole life.

I want someone who feels happy after talking with me and doesn’t feel like talking to me has become her habit because love is not a habit, love comes from the heart. If someone feels love is a habit, then that person hasn’t loved anyone by heart or by soul.

I want someone for whom I’m not just an attraction. I want someone who doesn’t have to think twice before choosing me. I want someone who is not confused and can decide what she thinks. I know every decision gets finalized by parents and that should happen, but if the person is not clear in her own thoughts, then what she will tell her parents. For me, love should come from our heart and soul and even if the person has flaws, then it’s our responsibility to accept the person with the flaws, because nobody in this world is perfect, every rose has the thorns, but then we also choose roses with thorns. In the same way, accepting the person with flaws doesn’t make any difference, because it was you and her who chose each other with the flaws and improved those flaws.

According to me, inner beauty is more important than outer beauty. Because sometimes the beautiful face holds the heartless soul. But in the society we are living in, none gives you the chance to show that you’re beautiful inside if you aren’t on the outside…And it’s a bitter truth…

Love is never an easy thing. Finding true love in this fake world is very difficult, but once you find it, hold tight because once, person gets hurt and leaves, then that person never returns in the same way.

Finally, I will say, for me, love is when you or your partner do things just to make others happy. It happens a lot when you don’t feel like doing the work, but you do it just to make them feel better if you hate waking up early, but you’ll wake up just to them happy if you hate traveling just but you’ll travel just travel, facing the smile on their faces. Before they tell you, you find out why they’re silent. Because eyes never lie. Love is even when anyone is upset or angry your partner shouldn’t leave or make you count your mistakes. Your partner should make you feel relaxed and comfortable. Love is like when two souls meet each other and don’t have any doubts when they hold each other’s hands and walk and don’t leave each other’s side on the darkest days, even when everyone is against you, but you both stay with each other. People love is where there’s not a hunger people just physical attraction when both people are clear in their thoughts and can see their future with each other. Where there’s trust, loyalty, love, sacrifice, care, attention, time, no broken promises, respect, belief and faith. For me, it matters how you treat your partner in front of others and in private, because sometimes “decorations are done just to deliver a good image, but in person it is kept like a useless showpiece”. Expressing love is difficult and once you express love and once you start loving the person to that level, that if they miss your call for once, you just get worried and you can’t focus on other things and when that person leaves you that feeling, it kills you.

In true love, sometimes, even after getting hurt, you have to let that person go. Destiny brought that person into your life, but destiny plays with us, even after bringing that person into your life, destiny will put you in a situation where you have to let that person go, doesn’t matter how deeply you loved, doesn’t matter how deeply it hurts.

When love comes in my way and if someone asks why I feel like she’s the one? And when they ask me how I knew she was the one?

I’ll tell them, because she loved me in spite of all the unlovable pieces she had to pick up.

It’s waking up in the middle of the night for no reason, shifting under the blankets and feeling the heat of the person next to you. You turn around and see them in their most innocent and vulnerable state. They breathed as they thought the weight of the world lay on anyone’s shoulder but their own. You smile, kiss their face in the most gentle manner so as not to awake them. You turn back around and an involuntary grim forms on your face. You feel an arm wrap around your waist and you know it doesn’t get better than that.