Confinement

Sneha finally decided that she is not going to leave that confinement and rather accept it as her destiny or fate. Her intrinsic decision silenced her mind after so long. The mere acceptance gave her relief. And suddenly whilst she was in her thoughts she received a phone call from her mother. At that moment she realized that there's isn't enough battery in her phone. Anyway, she was not in the right state of mind to talk to her mother. So, she let the phone ringing and after a point put the phone off. She has her answer prepared she is going to say to her mother.

She roamed around the room after so long that she felt as if she wouldn't be able to walk but somehow managed to do so. Her body was smelling and her entire surrounding was in a state of mess. Last night she just drank water and went to sleep. However, her sleep never really provided her with relaxation. The next morning felt heavy to her, but she somehow dressed herself up and went down to purchase something for herself to eat. She was feeling dizzy all way and felt like giving up in the midst. But she gathered all her inner strength and wrapped her work and came to the room.

suddenly, she felt all gloomy. she started feeling overwhelmed and then all of a sudden she started crying inconsolably. She for once thought that somebody could just be there for her. it has been 5 years that she has been staying in another city for her job. She straight away went up to the bathroom and kept staring at herself in the mirror. The tears kept drooling down and she kept on splashing water on them. It continued for about a minute long and then she just sat there in the washroom thinking nothing. At that moment nothing was crossing her mind. It came as a surprise to her that her mind was stale.

Suddenly, she realized a footstep in her apartment and she panicked and realized that she forgot to close the doors while coming back. she was frozen at the moment, she didn't do anything. She remained there in the confinement of her bathroom. After a while, she heard a voice. the voice was however recognizable. she even heard a knock on the door calling out her name. After repeated knocking, she finally gathered her courage to come out.

Raghav was standing there and he was shocked to see Sneha in that state. He for sure knew that something has went wrong with her. she has not been going to her job and did not even inform anyone. Raghav was Sneha's colleague. He tried speaking to her and getting to know what has happened. But, Sneha didn't speak at all. Although, she wanted she lacked the ability to interact. However, she was happy that someone was there. JUST THERE.

Raghav kept persuading Sneha to consult a doctor. She kept on nodding her head. Her phone started ringing and it was her mom again. She declined the call. Raghav left a letter on the table and left and asked her to take care of her and if in needed to contact him. Sneha did not pay heed to the letter and went to the kitchen to eat what she brought. She was extremely hungry. A week almost passed and she merely ate bread which already exceeded the expiry date and water. She was physically weak and mentally exhausted.

She finally called her mother. before even she could speak anything her mother asked her to be back home and that they have found a nice match for her marriage. She received a few photographs and biodata on her WhatsApp while on the call from her mother. she said nothing but hmmm...hmmm... After the call, she just went straight into her bedroom and stared at her walls and she went asleep. It was in the evening that she woke up and went to make herself tea. she sat down and she found a letter lying on the table and she recalled that Raghav left it there. She opened the letter and found that she is being fired from her job and that she has to pay a certain penalty.

she left her tea and did not even have a sip of it. she sobbed a while and then just splashed water on her face. She went into the room to grab her laptop and called on a number for an appointment. she got her appointment. the appointment was for a psychiatrist. whatever, she earned she spent on it to get back to her original state of being. Every day she went there although not wanting but somehow pushing herself and feeling resistance in her own individuality, however, she kept on managing. Every single day she got a new perspective and would find herself in a position to conquer the world but on the very another day she would feel hopeless and a vacuum would spread over her that she cannot somehow escape.

She was diagnosed with so many health issues physical as well as mental. The medicines became a part of her life routine. she was isolated rather she kept herself that way, her relationship was hampered, her job was gone and above all of that, her spirit to live was gone. she suddenly stopped all of her medications and stopped consulting any of the doctors. she without the knowledge of her mother changed her number and left the city. A missing complaint was even filed when after a constant struggle of trying to contact her. She went to a hilly area away from the city's noise and manipulation of people. she made her own small hut and breathed heavily. This breath of fresh air was a relief that she was longing for that no medication ever really provided her. She said to her inner self THIS IS WHAT I WANTED. ALWAYS! this is the life that I want to live. this is the confinement that I can remain in forever!!!!