Alighted blue spirit, the guide, helped me, to find myself on that darkest night of the year. I found my 'beloved', whose reflection was painted on my mirror of mind. I didn't know that beauty, only know her smell, charm and unpedantic heart beat. Simply the blow of kisses on my mind, poised my impure mentality. That judas touch had made my own breath very warm, the anxious blood was fully tensionless then! I followed her steps, my mind offered a name for her 'Manashi'.
Thedirty, grey path pushed me to step on to the road of self-dependence. The road of life was full of muddy love that night. Simple path touched my inner soul. She was going silently like a cool and mild breeze! by making my heart warm. The charmless night was charming with the stars of the female ambience. The gravity of reality, muddy path, cool but warm breeze, naivety of that nocturnal sleep and deepest first sight love, was walking with me also. The black long hair of that goddess like figure was ambling down towards the pond as I couldn't see her clearly. It seemed to me that she was wearing a splendid and reliable frock. Oh! She looked at me with her dark eyes, her eager eyes told me to "Come here, soon...". The ambience there was stopping me as this wasn't a right place to making love or having a big conversation. But the real me was still walking towards her,to reach my destiny, fate, life and love.
After crossing the paused pond, she vanished! Yes, she vanished in front of eyes! "Oops, I did a mistake, big
mistake again in my life." my mind told me madly. Something near my left chest was telling me to
find her, right then or I would not find her again in my
entire mundane life. I stepped again, crossed the pond with great difficulty even seeing her fluency to cross the pond. I started a new journey not to follow but to find her again. My chocked mouth told only 3 words rapidly
"Where are you?"
If aced a forest and started to find her there, when I reached the free space in the forest, my eyes were recharged and boosted again. I'd found her luckily. She
raised her hand to call me. Again my mind raised to tell
me "Where are you going?", I suddenly realised that she was sitting under a "Blue Boletus", my null mind couldn't think anything then, but the void love accelerated me to fill
the imagery with the girl. I stepped again...
The place where she was sitting didn't smell nice! It was awful like rotten living organisms, but I was getting a tremendous smell with each inhale from the person sitting near me. I reached to her, she queried if I knew her. Nodded my head to tell her 'yes' even I knew I didn't meet her or saw her in reality but I spoke after a long
pause" from time immemorial, I've a relation with you, I
don't know how but I'm sure of that." Just a sorrowful
silence was her only answer after hearing me.
I checked her, Icouldn't see her properly but judged she
was an impecable lady I'd ever seen in my life. Her beautiful dress and scintillating scent was lingering all
over the blue backdrop. The soft bed of that boletus was our mere companion also. She offered me to sit there and asked me a question like she had known me also. Her question was, "Do you like me?", I added, "Absolutely"
"But I love and like everyone", she said.Then the tragedy of life with a dry philosophy occured suddenly. The sphere around us turned all blue.
She told me, "I'm a spirit, here to help you. I want, your nourished future and well progression in life." As she knew from which condition I was going or I belonged to. She also knew her essence triggered my 'eros'. She paused after saying that, that muted the sound of my nearby air and glued my heart beat. A tiny tear appeared at her left eye. I placed it on my index finger, tried to run into the conversation again. Then she looked at me with a delight in her face. She asked, "Please, stay with me for sometime, I won't harm you, I'm sure you are also thinking that, am I wrong?", I slightly nodded to show her my answer is 'no'.She asked me to tell my story in brief. She added, "I knew you, but Ineed to hear how you think about your own life!" I said, "my life=fray and defeat, my dream=helping mankind, aim=nothing, fate=unlucky". my critical maths didn't bother her as she showed a guileless smile!
After that she paused again and told me a story. The time was passing steadily as the moon shone brightly among us. She described me a life of a prostitute girl. The girl was exploited by her own uncle and given that 'award' to hide that unwrapping of clothes. The nasty nailing of the society helped the girl to face another rape again! The worms of society had crushed the rose after soothing their need. After plucking her each petals she was thrown in an animistic way in this forest, she was still alive but the worms nearby her started to tear her muscles and some were entering into her nose, her anus. She realized that she was being eaten again. Both 'worms' helped her, first one to seize her beautiful life and second to seize her from the bondage of living. She told me that she was still alive and seeking for her mother when the worms entered into her scars of 'rape'.
Her blue eyes made me crying and the ambience slowly and silently contrasted into coolness. She told me the girl's name, 'Manashi' and told me to look around where I was sitting. I was stonned, my eyes and feelings both came to a halt, I forgot who I was or what I was doing there as I saw half eaten creature whose skeletons were peeping through the rotten muscles. I looked up, in front of me, she was missing! The ambience became horrific. I saw the deadbody again it was she! Her face was still smiling! Faint, guileless, but pale and white, I asked that body "Are you Manashi?", my voice still trembling with an unknown feeling! The body suddenly openedher eyes and closed again!
Answerless, she and the boletus told me everything!