Bitter Sweet

I took a sigh of relief. Whatever was kept hidden so far, I can now openly tell that yes! I am a Queer. I belong to such a family where love marriage is next to impossible. The bill has been passed now. We are not the offenders anymore. But society is still polarized. Like the Ganges which flows from East to West and river Narmada from West to East. They both have their unique existence and rather than having dominance on each other. A disguise, which was hidden from the family members. I met with the people having the same opinion and mindset of river Narmada.

We all were happy. A new home, a new life. We belonged to such a place where half the population is still not aware of women’s rights and to understand this concept is going to take ages. The court thinks it is natural and it gives me peace of mind. I do not want to debate on it but I am happy to get my rights. I got quite a few friends having the same opinion and with whom I can talk to. I am 26 and the marriage proposal started coming. Search for a suitable match started.

The proposals came from far and wide, beautiful girl, well-educated and from a well off family. But refusing to those proposals created my image as a high headed person. People thought that I am stubborn and haughty. Many people said that you earn ‘13K not 13M’, ‘Stop being so intractable’. They probably could not understand me. I too did not want to make them understand. I can’t wear their shoes neither they can wear mine. Yes, I am Aman, whose life lacks ‘Aman (peace)’. There is chaos everywhere. An investment banker, whose life is full of expected twists and turns. I can’t wear earrings or paint my nails. My job is to interact with people. A few wishes will suppress because life offers you a choice to either you fulfill your wishes or earn your livelihood. You have to kneel. Only on Saturday’s, I can freely do whatever I want. Few moments of freedom!!

Ranjit – ‘Where are you lost?’

Aman – ‘Dude What? my family desperately wants me to get married. My life is screwed up.’

Ranjit – ‘That’s it! Go to any matrimonial site and post your ad stating you are queer. What is the problem? Like We have! As we want to marry the person with the same sex. You enjoy. The wedding will in good for society and for you too. How is it possible not to have a single queer in your community?’

Aman was surprised and told – ‘You jerk! From where you got this in your mind? What an excellent idea!’

They both ordered a rum and started to drink. After some time, they both were dancing on a Bollywood movie ‘Cocktail’ song named ‘tum hi bandhu’

Whose lyrics were like!

’ When my lover cares about me

Why should I care about this world?

The world puts restrictions on me

I don't belong to this world at all

You're there in the morning; you’re there in the evening

You are my friend; you are my Beloved’

When they both got tired they went to Ranjit’s home. When they woke up they both were lying on the same bed.

‘How many times it has happened between us?’ asked Aman.

Ranjit – ‘Scoundrel!!! Oh God, how I fell for him.’

Aman – ‘Stop this drama’

Ranjit – ‘Six times! When your wife will come darling, she will take your classes.’

Aman – ‘Move - move’, He told and started to get ready to go home.

On the way, he registered himself on many dating and matrimonial sites. Dating continued for 2 – 3 months through the site. Many refused. Then he found Chanchal, ‘Carefree’ as her name suggested. Pleasant and crisp face didn’t suggest that she is involved in these sorts of things.

She had curly hair, dark complexion and a different style. Their first date was in Starbucks.

They met.

Chanchal asked- ‘’ When did you get to know that you are……’

Aman – ‘Oh gregarious girl is falling short of words. I will tell you when I was in class 10th I fell in love for the first time with a boy, I could not reckon at that time. With the passes of time I understood a bit, when I searched on net I figured what it is all about. How did you come to know that you are a bisexual?’

Chanchal – ‘First I am not scared of anyone, you are a human being too, you won’t eat me alive. Yes, it is from my childhood. In the 11th standard, I hooked up with a girl and in 12th, a boy. God swear, I won’t even look at the boys like you. The family is pressurizing to get married that’s why I am here.

Aman – ‘Whoa, whoa!!! Ma’am is in full swing now.’

Chanchal – ‘Don’t be a moron Whoa, whoa, what it is? Don’t ask questions about my favorites and all, God swear, I am bored to death. It is all on Facebook about me, and I have read about you on Instagram. Hopefully, you have read.

Aman – ‘Yes your majesty. Will I get a chance to talk?’

Chanchal – ‘When have I stopped you from talking my boy? Talk Talk.’

Aman – ‘what did you like so far in me?’

Chanchal – ‘You are quite a mouthpiece. My heart is singing. Since I chatted with you for the first time, I started liking you. You are husband material type. Very - very cool. I don’t have to work too hard on you. Yes, one more thing, the mole spots on the left side of your lips up and down look too sexy. I can’t say more, now you tell something about me.’

Aman’s eyes were wider with surprise.

‘No one scanned me so well in my whole life’ – Aman thought.

Chanchal – ‘Yes – yes tell, your turn now.’

Aman was speechless.

Should say something good that’s why he told ‘I am scanning you.’

Chanchal – ‘Ohooo! Look but with love.’

Aman’s smiled and told – ‘Your blue eyes, style of walking and arranging your messy hair in every five minutes and on the top of that, a mole on the beauty spots of the left cheek. I can’t guess how many guys your beauty might have killed.’

Chanchal – ‘Oh my oh my’

One of them was outgoing and one introvert, they both become good friends. They both needed marriage, they belonged to the same caste and they both were compatible with each other.

After 10 months

Chanchal – ‘A few rules before marriage’

Aman – ‘Tell me your grace’

Chanchal – ‘We will share the household expenditure.’

Aman – ‘What could be better than this?’

Chanchal – ‘We will never act as an obstacle for each other’s sexuality and neither question.’

Aman – ‘That’s why we are together.’

Chanchal – ‘Yes ok. There will be no restriction on parties.’

Aman – ‘Your family is mine now, and my family is yours.’

Chanchal – ‘And the fifth one is that there is no rule.’

Aman – ‘Let’s do evil things together.’

After 8 months the marriage took place but only for the name’s sake, there was no restriction on freedom. Party and everything continued. It had been 5 – 6 months after marriage. Chanchal’s mind started to change. She didn’t like Aman coming late. Every time she would ask where he was. She became hysteric even if she saw any boy or girl with Aman.

Aman – ‘Oh, I am so pissed off with your changing behavior. God! Since when did it start to happen between us?’

Chanchal – ‘You should also have some responsibilities. I wait for you thinking that you might be coming. I want to have food together. But it happens only twice or thrice in a week.’

Aman – ‘You don’t have friends to talk to?’

Chanchal – ‘But I want to talk to a friend called husband.’

Aman – ‘Dear there is a life outside the wedlock as well. You know that I am an investment banker. Most of my time is spent in client follow up as well.’

Chanchal – ‘I know your follow-ups, every day someone new in the bed.’

Aman – ‘We decided that we will not restrict each other’s freedom and did I ever stop you from having extramarital affairs, then why are you questioning me.’

Chanchal lost her temper and smashed the glass on the wall.

Chanchal – ‘I am a human being too; I can’t wait for you every day.’

Aman – ‘Oh gosh!!I can’t stand these marital fights.’

Chanchal – ‘I am not fighting. I have to make you understand my point for the first time in my life.’

Aman too got angry and raised his hand but did not hit Chanchal.

Chanchal got frightened and in frenzy, she ran and tried to lock herself up in the bedroom. Aman too ran behind her fearing that she might try to commit suicide. He managed to get into the room before the door got locked. Chanchal tried to hit Aman’s chest with her hands. Aman tried to control her, and then kissed her forehead and lips. He hugged her and told these hand will be there for protecting you not to hit you.

Chanchal wiping her tears told – ‘Do you want to suffocate me? Let me go.’

When Aman left her she told – ‘Listen you punk, I will not spare you so easily. For 7 days you will buy food from outside and eat. I will not cook for you after coming back from the office.’

Aman – ‘Agreed my queen’

Chanchal laughed. Then told – ‘I want to get involved in your plans and you will be involved in each of my plans.’

Aman – ‘But I won’t come to your Kitty parties.’

Chanchal – ‘You swine! Tell me with how many you sleep in a month.’

Aman – ‘Your husband is a stud, not less 50 – 60 will suffice for me.’

Chanchal – ‘Stop boasting’

Aman – ‘I have only 3 friends and you have already met them,’

Chanchal saw in Aman’s eyes and told ‘I need you.’

Aman took her in his arms and told ‘You are my life’

In the meantime, Chanchal’s phone rang. Her aunt wished her on her birthday.

Aman forgot that it was her birthday. He realized that Chanchal had every right to be angry.