Ruchika Verma

Drama Romance Thriller

4  

Ruchika Verma

Drama Romance Thriller

When the Beloved Cries

When the Beloved Cries

9 mins
200


It was Twilight. Anand was walking in the valley, slowly changing its colour from orange to dark, over the fallen leaves of Autumn. Suddenly, he heard her voice.


He stopped walking and the sound of the dry autumn leaves crunching under his feet came to an abrupt end too. He went ahead, trying to locate the source of her voice. It has been a while since he last heard anything from her or about her. Their final meeting was a dreadful event as far as his memory went. There was blood, screams, tears, laughter, anger, satisfaction, relief, sadness, happiness, what feeling belonged to whom is not clear and can never be.


The crunching of the leaves under his feet was now rapid. Crunch, crunch, crunch. He was running now but he did not realize it until he was at the very end of his way. No one was around. But still her voice serenaded through him like a sweet torture. He could hear it clearly now, she was singing, something related to love and pain, something very old yet promising new adventures.


He went the other way, hiked up, then hiked down. Looked right and then looked left. Looked upwards at the sky as if saying a prayer, looked down at the valley, as if looking down at himself and his very own doomed future.


He searched more for the source of her voice, nowhere could it be found. He was desperate. He was almost crazy, but then who is not when they are in love?


He remembers his love for her. Full of fire, full of passion. Nothing could deter his love. He loved her too much, way too much. His love was like an all consuming fire, consuming himself and his beloved, while burning down everything and anything which comes in between them.


Amidst of the memory of the love which belonged to him but was no longer his, he searched for her more. He was getting agitated, he couldn’t find her. It was just like those old days when she would try to hide from him, under the bed, behind the doors, behind the sofa. He loved to search for her and always ended up finding her. But right now, he could not. He just could not. And he was getting angry. His heartbeat fastened, he started feeling hot, he was furious now, but still, he could not find her.


He calmed himself down and then again listened to her voice. It was more melodious, happier, than the last time he had listened to it. He concentrated hard on the voice and its source. He mediated on the way she hummed and suddenly his feet started walking themselves towards her.


She was sitting there, almost at the edge of the mountain, dangerously close to the end. He moved towards her but stopped in the middle. Should he really approach her? He wondered if he would surprise her or shock her. Maybe he would frighten her. Will she be scared of him?


But was that new? Was she not always scared of him? Uncomfortable in his presence, never at peace with herself or with the things around her. But that’s what too much love does to a person. It scares them, it is normal, he thought. But to what extent, he wondered, remembering fragments of their last meeting.


He decided to approach her, slowly, not too quickly, he didn’t want to surprise her. She was sitting too close to the edge.


“Hey…” He gently whispered, it was so soft she probably didn’t hear it the first time. Then he tried again, louder, and this time she slowly turned towards him and stood up.


She looked at him with a blank face as if his presence didn’t affect her. It probably did not. Alive or Dead, same for me, she has thought at their last meeting.


Anand, however, could not remain unaffected. He was surprised to see her looking so radiant. There was glow to her; the kind only enlightened souls possessed. She was glowing, bright but yet her face looked pale. Her eyes were not shining like before but they looked happier. Her hair was unruly but they looked so soft and silky.


To say the least, Anand was mesmerized by her beauty, even though there were little imperfections here and there. He could not believe himself to be actually standing in her presence. She just looked so ethereal. He could not take his eyes off her, even though he wanted to as memories of their last night together started to flood his mind.


He wondered, was it true? Did it happen for real? No, that can’t be. She can’t do that, she loved me too much to be doing something like that. I am just being a fool.


“Anand.” She said gently. His name coming from her almost sounded foreign, alien. He used to love whenever she used to call his name but today, it did not feel that good. It almost frightened him.


She smiled a little, a very gentle smile on her face which almost reminded him of the witches he used to read about in his childhood.


He was stunned. The beautiful, gentle girl, he had loved so diligently was looking like a menace to him. She was looking at him like he was the menace himself.


“What is going on here?” He asked angrily, but his voice came out weak, almost shrilly.


“I don’t know. What are you doing here?” She asked, crossing her hands across her chest, but it was not a defending gesture. It looked like the body language of someone who has been through storms and hurricanes and have managed to come back alive and was ready to tell the world of their bravery and valour.


“What am I doing here? I don’t know. I was lost and roaming here and there until I hear your voice.” Anand replied hastily, feeing extremely under confident. What had happened to him? Where was all his bravery and masculinity gone? Why was he feeling so afraid of her as if she could hurt him again, she possibly can’t. She has done the damage already. She has broken his heart and his trust, the trust he gave her to treasure like his own life, she has destroyed it all.


 “Why are you even here anymore? Go back to where you went. Go back to where I sent you, to the isolation and never-ending doom.” She said through gritted teeth slowly.


She herself could not believe it. Why was he still there? Has he no shame? Nobody wanted him here or anywhere else for that matter. Why he can’t just leave, she wondered. I have made leaving so easy for him, she wondered.


“What are you saying? Since the day I left home, this valley has been my only abode. I can’t go anywhere far from you. My love for you just won’t allow me that.” Anand voice had a hint of desperation. He was almost begging her to reconsider her decision. What she did cannot be undone now. But she could still make things work, if she wanted to.


“Pause the drama. What love are you even talking about? The one where you went drinking out? The one where you used to come home late and abuse me in all ways possible?” She took a deep breath and then shuddered a bit.


Anand looked at her, shameful, but not yet regretful. He wondered if he ever did abuse her? Surely they had fights every once in a while and he may have hit her too once or twice, but wasn’t that normal in Indian households? Wasn’t that how husbands treated their wives?


After all, who he could release his frustration on, other than his better half? She was his better half. She had a share in everything he possesses, his heart, his feelings, his anger, his frustration. What was wrong in that? He was just a husband who gave his wife equal rights to do and feel as he does.


“I was just sharing myself with you.” He said, as a matter of fact. But somehow, the argument which sounded strong in his mind, coming out of his mouth felt extremely stupid, even to himself.


“Sharing yourself with me?” She chuckled a little, but it was sarcastic. She chuckled more at the thought of having to deal with this idiot man who didn’t even matter anything anymore.


“You were a beast. You were a total disaster of a human being. You did not share yourself with me. You just vented out your frustrations on me and then bought me make-up as to make up with me. But even you know you bought it so I could hide my scars and marks.”


Anand wondered about it for a minute. His wife was naturally beautiful. She did not need any make up but then why did he buy it for her? Was she really speaking the truth?


In his own mind, he knew she was. But what even if she was? He loved her. Some pain is a small exchange for the love so grand.


“Oh you fool, man! You big fool. You thought it was your love? It was not love. I loved you. But all you ever did was to try to control me. Your love was not love, it was a never-ending obsession. You were too possessive, too controlling. You didn’t treat me like a wife, you treated me like a bird who was meant to be caged. Your love was just not love, and you better get over it now!” He thought she screamed, but even if she did, he did not know. He was no longer listening. He could not.


He started shaking his head, no, this could not have happened. Had he really made her life hell? Had he really made her feel caged? Now the regret started to seep in, but it was too late.


“Why are you back? Just go back to the hell I sent you to! I did not kill you to have you come back to me! Just go away and leave me alone!” She screamed and this time he heard her, clear and loud.


He now remembered their last night vividly, it was no more fragmented. He could see her hiding below the bed, shivering. He could remember dragging her out and shouting at her for the business deal gone wrong. He remembers accusing her of cheating, of wanting to leave him because he could not seal that one important deal.


And then he could remember her resisting, finally taking out the knife from her back pocket and stabbing him once at his chest, then stabbing again and again, crying hysterically. She kept on stabbing until the red in front of his eyes changed to black and his eyes again opened in the valley clueless as to what had happened.


Anand looked at her wife, but was she even his wife anymore, or was he her husband anymore? Who was he? Was he anything at all? She was right, he did not matter anything anymore.


“I killed you, I killed you! I killed you for good, because Earth does not need to weigh down under the weight of a brute like you! Here I confess to you my crime, to you, the sinner who made me commit such a grave sin. Now go away, go to wherever you have to but just leave me alone! Go away!” She shouted and turned her back towards him.


He looked at her back, stunned but satisfied. A feeling of relief took over him. He felt light, lighter than the soul he was currently. He looked at her back for the one last time before he closed his eyes for forever and hoped to never open them again, because those were the very eyes that have seen his beloved cry.


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