The Unspoken Words

The gentle breeze is tickling on the back of our neck...the cool tides are kissing the feet…feels like they are playing a piece of romantic music and the new moon is smiling warmly looking at us…seems like a spotlight focusing on us on the dance floor…and in the moon glance her face is glowing like a pole star…her radiant smile is made her look even more pretty. But the very moment she said goodbye with tears in her eyes, I realized something I never felt before, and with a heavy heart said goodbye.

Laying in bed I unknowingly started thinking about my feelings that are hidden deep down for so long. I still remember the day when I first met her in our school. When I was playing with my friends during the sports period I saw a few of our classmates bullying a girl and she left crying. In the afternoon my class teacher introduced a newly admitted girl to our class, and it was the second time I saw her. She was so calm and innocent. No one was talking to her she asked a couple of students to give her the notes but they denied them. Then I went to her and gave my notes. She said thank you. I introduced myself "Hi myself Ram. May I know your good name please?" she smiled and said, "Hi I am Janani". I asked about her whereabouts and she said that her father was recently transferred here and due to shifting she joined late in school.

With moving time our friendship was strengthened we became best friends. We used to hang out on the weekends and did combined studies during exams. Whenever she gets in trouble she comes to me first. If we go on shopping we used to select clothes for each other. Even before she says that she likes or needs something I brought them to her. She treats me like my mother and cares for me. But after high school, they moved to another city for higher studies. Though we can't meet regularly we were in touch through phone calls and e-mails. We share every tiny thing that happens in our day-to-day life. After plus two she joined medicine and I joined engineering. One day she called me and said she was in a relationship with her senior, I worried about her because she is a very good human with a golden heart and she only sees good in others still I was confident about her choice. Even after being in a relationship she never ignored me and our friendship remained the same.

She asked me to visit her once so that she can introduce her boyfriend to me. We met and he seemed fine she was so happy with him. Seeing her happy my heart was at peace. She also introduced her best friend Sowmya soon we became good friends. Life was going well we graduated and the rest of our lives started then. I was planning to set up a startup but it was delayed due to financial issues. She was preparing for the PG entrance exam then suddenly her boyfriend started ignoring her, he was not giving her enough time and was responding to her phone calls barely. Sowmya informed me of this. Soon I spoke to her she was heartbroken and was crying while speaking on phone. I asked about her boyfriend and she said crying that she caught him cheating with some other girl. She was unable to concentrate on her preparation.

I decided to take her out of the trauma and was spending a lot of time talking to her and deviating her from the breakup. I suggested she join the dance class because she loves to dance and she joined. In the process, I didn't even realize that I am falling for her till she said goodbye. I immediately told Sowmya about my feelings and she asked me to wait for the right time. I agreed with her because she was still hiding her pain and heartbreak behind her smile to comfort us. Days are passing I’m taking more care and giving more attention than before. And finally, I decided to plan a surprise visit to her and express my feelings on her birthday.

I didn’t wish her I know she would be waiting for my call but I wanted to wish her directly. I told Sowmya about my surprise visit and she told me that Janani was upset. I told her to bring her to her favorite restaurant and I will be waiting for them. On seeing me her face glowed like a moon and her happiness, and excitement are evident in her eyes. But I never got a chance to express my love. I thought of telling the next day but then I don't have any clue that this night will turn out to be a nightmare. The next day when I am getting ready to meet her I got a call from Sowmya. “Ram sorry to say this but back off from your proposal plan,” she said. I became blank and asked her why. "Yesterday we had a conversation about you and she said that she had a gut feeling that you like her," she replied. "What did she say?" I asked. "I sent a voice message please listen to it," she said hanging the phone.

I played the message it was her voice. "I'm feeling like Ram is in love with me and I don't want that to happen. I love him so much but not the way he was thinking. He has been my best friend, my strength, my support, my confidence, my courage, and everything. Even now I share my location whenever I go out and come home late without any fear just because I trust him that whatever happens to me he will be there for me and protect me even if he is not around me. And now if he proposes I will be broken too badly and our relationship will no longer be the same again and I can't bear if our friendship breaks and will be left alone." She cried while speaking. Tears filled my eyes and I decided not to say a single word and left the city saying goodbye to my best friend.