The Dawn

“How come you have got back so early Stella? You have taken half a day off or what?” Sam asked as he opened the door and saw his sister standing near the doorway.

Stella folded her umbrella and placed it in a corner and followed her brother inside. Water dripped from the folded umbrella, forming a small puddle below. The rain had abated and it was right now just a drizzle. The brother and sister sat on the sofa side by side and soon Sam’s wife Maria joined them

“Ah! Stella! There must be some special news for you to have come at this time. Looks like you attended your office just for half a day. Shall I get you something to drink or eat? Cold juice or will you have lunch? We just had our meals and there is plenty for yet another person,“ Maria asked as she sat near Stella. Her voice was replete with concern and affection. Food was never a problem in this house. There was plenty of it. Maria never knew how to cook for just two persons.

“No. No lunch Maria. I had the sandwiches which I had packed with me but left the office soon. Just get me some really chilled juice dear. And be quick, as I have come here to discuss with you both something very sensitive,” Stella said as she placed her handbag on the centre table.

She sipped the juice, relishing it little by little.

“Home made?” she asked Maria.

“Yes Stella. Sam brought some mangoes from our farm and I made a few bottles. In fact, I have put aside for you two bottles of it. I also have three bottles of pickles and was thinking of dropping in one of these days. As for the juice, it is concentrated. You only have to add cold water,” she smiled indulgently.

 Stella placed the empty glass on the table.

Looking at Maria she said, “That was delicious Maria. I don’t think I can make such wonderful juice. You have added a little bit of lime, right?”

“Yes Stella. I have. It enhances the taste.” Maria smiled.

Stella looked at Sam. She said with hesitation, “Yes, I have come here to discuss with both of you, something serious. It’s about Matilda.”

Sam looked at Maria. He recalled his wife’s words.

“Matilda is very selfish Sam! She won’t lift a finger to help her mother like our children do. Throws tantrums even at this age and is worried only about self. I am really concerned about your sister. I am sorry to say this but that brat is being pampered too much.”

That was the truth. Matilda was a girl who got all that she wanted. Stella had given into her sympathising that her little girl was fatherless!

Stella would often say,

“Aw!! Once she gets married and runs her own home, she will become responsible“.

But will she? Sam was doubtful.

Stella looked at Sam.

“I took half a day off to discuss Matilda with you both Sam,” she said. “She does not know that I have come to see you.”

Sam and Maria looked at her with worried expressions.

“All these years, I have been under the illusion that I was the best mother and I had a most loving daughter who doted on me. But all that has been shattered. I have been taken for granted, Sam. There is no love but only selfishness. It has been revealed now. And what a painful revelation it has been.”

There were tears in her eyes.

Sam did not say anything. He looked at Maria whose eyes said - “I told you so.”

He maintained silence and just let his sister continue.

“There was a seminar last Thursday and I was to return only after seven. I had told Matilda that I might be late and she told me “Don’t worry Mom. Roger is coming over and we will be discussing about the things we need to buy and about the marriage reception.” You know Sam, that we have fixed her wedding with Roger.

But it so happened that the gentleman who has come from the Country Office, London, took ill and the seminar got postponed. I came home early and was about to open the door with my latch key when I heard voices. Roger and Matilda were seated on the sofa which was near the window. Since the curtains were drawn they could not see me.

Matilda was telling Roger, “Poor Mom. She thinks I am asking her to take voluntary retirement out of concern for her. It’s nothing of that sort. We will move in here after our marriage Roger and let the new apartment out on rent. The new apartment is going to be registered in my name in two weeks. We will be getting a lot of money for it, since it will be furnished. Mom can occupy the bedroom upstairs and the whole of downstairs will be ours. You have seen that we have three bedrooms down here. When Papa was alive, they built this house. It has been modernised and pained fresh. We have a good maid and a gardener. Both are trustworthy. Mom can do the cooking – she is a wonderful cook you know- and later perhaps can look after our kids. It solves the problem of searching for a good cook and a nanny – when the kids happen – for us. “

I heard Roger saying, “You think of everything ‘Tilda. I have always wondered how it was that your Papa who was so good looking and handsome ended up marrying your Mom.”

Matilda was saying,

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“Papa and Uncle Sam were thick pals and it is said Papa used to visit our grandpa’s home very often those days. Papa always said that Mom had a beautiful heart and was so talented despite her pock-marked face and protruding teeth. He fell in love with her! Can you believe it? Love is certainly blind as they say.”

“Well, I am glad you resemble your Papa and not your mother. You are beautiful,” Roger’s voice reverberated with joy.

“Yes! Everyone says I look like Papa and thank God! He was so handsome. He died when I was nine years old and I always wondered what a poor match Papa and Mom made. But they seemed very happy together. But I don’t much care for my mom. Wish she was pretty!! Anyway, that can’t be helped. She does everything for me, I know. But moms are supposed to be like that. What else are they for? “Matilda could be heard saying.

Roger replied quickly, “But my Mama is not like that. We have been brought up to do things on our own. Even Papa would clear his dinner and lunch plates after he finished his meals,” and he laughed.

“Well, you can relax after moving in here. My mom will clear the plates and glasses and all that. I never lift my fingers and I live like a princess here!”Matilda was saying.

“Ah!! So, I will be like a king,” i could hear Roger saying and laughing loud.

I could not bear it anymore and opened the door with the latch key and went in as if I had just entered the house.

The kids were surprised to see me and I told them that the seminar had been postponed.

 That night, I could not sleep for a long time. It hurt me so much to know how much I was being taken for granted by my daughter. If Peter was alive...maybe she would have cared for me genuinely...but I doubt it. She doesn’t love me at all Sam. I am just a no body to her. She just needs me and there is a lot of difference between the words ‘love’ and ‘need’. I have read about daughters who are devoid of any attachment...but I never imagined it would happen to me. And she meant a whole world to me. I recall sitting with her in the nights till eleven and help her with her studies. She was not a very bright student. Her interests lay more in other things. And I let her accept that job in the T V Channel because she loved all glamour. She met Roger who was with some other Channel. It’s okay...so long as they are happy. It looks like they are. And his family is good Sam.”

Stella was sobbing quietly and Sam could do nothing but hold her hands.

Maria broke the silence.

“Well Stella. At least now you know how things stand or where you stand. What are you going to do about this? I know how terrible you must be feeling! But we both are there for you...please remember this always. And our kids dote on you. You can move in with us if you wish to. You need not resign your job. I know how much your job means to you.”

Stella wiped her face with the pallu of her saree and tried to smile.

“I thought for four nights and took this decision. I had told Matilda that in a fortnight, we shall register the new apartment in her name. But I have changed my mind. I will not be a doormat anymore, Maria. If you are free – both of you – please come with me tomorrow afternoon for the registration of the new apartment. I have told the builder that I shall go over for the registration taking him with me. The builder and the registrar are great friends and it makes things easy for me. I am registering the apartment in Sam’s and my name. I will be moving into the new apartment after the wedding while the kids are on their honeymoon. The new furniture will be placed here in my house and I shall take away my old things. When they come back, this home will be ready for them. I will not be retiring ...i still have six years of service- and will continue my work from there. And I am sure both of you will be there for me always. I have realised that I need to live in dignity! I will.”

“Of course, Stella, we will stand by you and will be with you always. I am happy the new apartments are just within walking distance from here. You have taken a very good and wise decision. We will certainly come with you for the registration,” Sam said to his sister.

“Yes Stella. You can have the freedom which you have never had! Forget all the ungratefulness and live your life the way you want to. We know the sacrifices you have made in your life, bringing up your daughter singlehandedly. We realise them,” Maria said.

Stella smiled.

“I feel so peaceful now Maria. Get me one more glass of your delicious juice. I need it.”

It had stopped raining. The sky was clear, devoid of the dark clouds.

 Like her heart.

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