Listen to my Heart

Bashudha! The strongest form of a woman, who hold all the pain inside but always sacrifice for others with a smile on her face is our mother earth. Deep inside of the heart many untold stories, feelings, memories are hidden just like it's a deep cave. Sometimes these untold feelings try to come out but they don't find a true listener who will listen not only with ears but also with heart. Many times these memories cry inside in search of the listener and shout "Listen to my heart!" This story is Mr. Abhinav and Mrs. Sabitri's eldest daughter Basudha's story.

40 years ago, a daughter was born as the first child of Mr. Abhinav and Mrs. Sabitri. Everyone congratulated the new parents and said that Goddess Lakhmi has arrived. Even how easy goddess Lakshmi's life was! No one thought about it. After some years, Mr. Abhinav was blessed with another daughter. Mrs. Sabitri was feeling lost. Everyone taunts her for giving birth to two girls. Relatives made Mrs. Sabitri's life like hell. People started suggesting Mr. Abhinav marry again for a male child. Mrs. Sabitri thought maybe the third time she will be blessed with a son. But God gifted them, twin daughters.

Mr. Abhinav tries to console his wife, "Sabitri, it's god's wish. Now we should raise our daughters properly so that they can get a beautiful future in their life." Mrs. Sabitri doesn't say her feelings to Mr. Abhinav but she was unhappy as her wish for a son was unfulfilled. As the eldest daughter, Basudha knows about her mother's sorrows. It's because of Mr. Abhinav's love, Mrs. Sabitri holds herself back and took care of her daughters. So she promised own self that she will never do such a thing that will make her mother sad. And she will do all the things which will bring pride to her father.

Mr. Abhinav was very open-minded. He encouraged Basudha to study well, participate in games. For Basudha, Dad's words were like words written on stones. She focused on Dad's words. With time she became good friends with her classmates who all are good in studies and extracurricular activities. But 95% of her friends were boys. Mrs. Sabitri doesn't like her daughter's friendship with boys. Basudha doesn't like her mother Mrs. Sabitri's this type of narrow thinking. She wonders why people think that one boy and girl can not be a friend. It may be due to some stereotypical movies! Basudha tried to explain to her mother that they are just good friends, that's all.

"What people will say!" spoils many lives. But her father firmly told her, "I believe my daughter, she will never do anything which will break my pride." Basudha continued her journey with great responsibility. Basudha developed an interest in Cricket and shuttle. Me. Abhinav supported her for this also. He started giving her coaching. But mother always told to Basudha, "our family girls don't play such games. That's too with boys! What people will say!" Basudha couldn't able to explain to her mother that she likes this. And though no girls are playing Cricket and shuttle, so she is playing with boys. Finally, for mothers happiness, Basudha stopped playing.

Basudha felt that she was traveling in two boats at the same time. One is her wish and another is her mother's wish. It's difficult to maintain the balance. Either she will get hurt or her mother will get hurt. Sometimes she feels exhausted which made her think that she should go to the top of the hills and shout out loudly, "Listen to my heart!" 

Dad always thinks that with their studies she should do extra activities. So he got her admitted to a Classical dance class. Mom just accepted because by doing dance Basudha will be fit. She will not get any health problems. Fighting the battle with the girly rules of the society Basudha passed her tenth board exam. Dad was so happy because in their family she was the first girl who scored such good scores. Nearby her home women's college was there. Basudha got a seat there. Now she is in Junior college. New life, new experience was waiting ahead.

Mom was thinking that once Basudha will reach 18 years then they can do her marriage just like it was done for other girls in the family. One day Basudha returned from college and asked mom, "Mom, in my college annual day is there. Some girls we're participating in groups. They have a shortage of one girl and they heard that I know the classical dance. So they asked me to join their group. Will you give permission!" Mom replied, "No you can not participate. If any relatives will come to know then it will create a bad image."

Basudha was interested too. But finally, she listened to her mom. On the day of the annual program, she felt like something is dying inside her. Her heart was crying, "Listen to me! I also want to dance." But no one was there to listen to her. She found deep darkness. She was not able to find out her path. In many girls' life, the biggest fear is marriage. The problems started when Basudha reached eighteen. Some proposals came where the food habits of the groom's family were opposite to Basudha's food habits. And they assured that Basudha will get practiced to their food. Thank God Basudha's dad refused the proposal. He doesn't want Basudha to change without her wish.

Basudha thought that why everyone expects a girl to sacrifices her choices, why people can't let her live as per her choice! She is also one human being. Basudha could not find the answer to her question. But Basudha's dad made it clear that after completing her graduation, he will do her marriage. Basudha focused her studies but things always don't let you live in peace. Relatives were much more interested in Basudha's marriage. When she was in her final year, one more proposal came in which her mom was also interested in. The boy belongs to a family friend's family.

Mom got angrier when Basudha refused to marry before the final exam. When the boys of the joint family were asking bikes to their parents, Basudha was asking permission to complete her studies. Many people don't understand the dreams of a girl. Dad was sticking to his decision. So Mom also became quiet. One day Basudha's cousin, Anuj came to the home. Anuj asked Mrs. Sabitri, "Aunt! I heard that your family friend's proposal came for Basudha!" Mrs. Sabitri replied sadly, "yes, but your uncle and Basudha were not ready for marriage before, completing her graduation."

Anuj told, "You should thanks, God. That boy's marriage was fixed. On the day of engagement, he called off it. Because he was in love with some other girl. Later he married his girlfriend. At least he should call off earlier. The other girl's father arranged a grand party for engagement." Basudha's mother, Mrs. Sabitri got shocked. On the day of engagement, these kinds of things were very painful for the girl as well as for her parents. After knowing this Basudha was quite happy because mom will not force her to marry.

Basudha was happy like she won a war. The war of her dreams and Mom's society fear. But she knows that it's for a little time only. After her graduation mom will start again. The only way to get rid of this is to get a job after completing her studies. Many People never thought that some girls have dreams of making a career out of it. The life of a girl was not easy. When everyone was trying to do their best in their studies an incident happened with Basudha.

In Senior College, Basudha got admission in co-education. There were boys. Dad thought that after graduation, Basudha will face the real world. That time she has to face both women and men. She should get practiced to that. So he put her in co-education. A girl has to face these things also. Whether she is interested in love or not, for some boys that don't matter. They think about their feelings only.

One day Basudha's class topper claimed that "if he proposes Basudha, she will accept it. Because he is the topper." Basudha laughed at it when one of her friends told her this. Basudha thought if his face is not good at least he should keep his heart beautiful. Basudha wants to slap him. But she knows how to do that in a better manner. Strange world. Someone thinks he is senior so the girl will accept his love proposal, someone thinks he is handsome, so the girl will do. No one thinks that about what the girl wants.

Basudha focused on her studies and became the 1st student of their batch to get a job through a campus interview. Basudha joined her office. Mom also felt happy because Basudha was the first girl in the family who will do the job. At least people won't say that no marriage proposal so she is unmarried. Now she can say that she is a working woman. She proved that she didn't waste her time. She is equal to the boys of the family now. Basudha is an inspiration to her younger sisters.

Basudha has entered a new world. But she forgets

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that there are so many people in the world who are waiting to grab each other. If a girl refuses their love proposal, she became a characterless woman. People will be attracted towards her fearless character but when it's come to marriage, they expect her to listen to her husband without objection. Her husband's decision will be the final one. She should not do anything as per her wish. Some expect her to leave her job after marriage.

Basudha does not feel good to go along with these types of thinkings. She felt like someone trying to cut her wings, someone trying to stop her from breathing. A working woman also can take care of her family. It's a sad truth that We only say, "Beti Bachao, Beti padhao." Save the girl child, Educate the girl child. But no one thinks what's next! Do we want an educated homely girl! She should use her learnings for the development of society.

It's a sad truth that many people do not bother with the next move of a girl after her education. Some people only teach their daughters, so that they can get good marriage proposals. Luckily Achyut came into Basudha's life. He did not keep any conditions for marriage. More of that he agreed that doing the job or not doing the job will be purely Basudha's decision. Mr. Abhinav was searching for such a kind of boy for Basudha. So he did not see the cast or family status differences and agreed to the marriage proposal.

 Achyut gave all freedom to Basudha to take her decision herself. Basudha knew that Achyut and her upbringing happened in different environments. Still, Achyut supports her in all situations. One day in the office, one gentleman asked Basudha, "your husband, father, father-in-law, all are doing a good job, what was the point for you to become one working woman? You can stay at home and rest." At that moment, the question arises in Basudha's mind about the existence of a woman. Is her identity is only from her husband or her father or her father-in-law! Can't she make her identity of her own?

Basudha knows how to reply. She replied, "I respect the homemakers. Everyone has the right to live as per their wish. I didn't study to become a housewife with a degree. I studied with a dream of doing a job and making my own identity. If we open our eyes and try to see then we can find that it's a dead dream of many housewives. They did not get an environment to pursue their dreams." The gentleman went silently. We expect a woman to sacrifice their dreams. If not then she is an arrogant, ambitious lady. But do we give respect if she sacrifices her dreams!

After marriage, everyone will have one common question for the couple. That is, "When will you have kids!" Same Basudha also faced. From relatives, friends, inlaws, she received the same question. As if people get married only to have children. Why no one understands that marriage means is two people become one heart. They should know and respect each other, their choices. It's their choice when they will have kids. Achyut also got tension for a similar type of question. He was concerned that he has to plan someone to take care of the kid so that Basudha can resume back to her office after her maternity leave.

Basudha and Achyut were happy. They were expecting their first baby. Meanwhile, Basudha faced one more struggle in her life. That was one worst experience that almost all pregnant women faced in their careers. They don't get their work credits just because they will go on maternity leave or they came from maternity leave. Basudha worked day and night on the new projects but didn't get the promotion that she deserved. Because after one month she will go on maternity leave. She felt depressed. But she tried to hold her emotions so that they won't affect her unborn baby.

Basudha and Achyut were overwhelmed. They welcome the apple of the eye to the world. They started enjoying their parenthood. Time goes on. Basudha's maternity leave is over. She joined the office and tried to get back to her old performance level and do better. She knows when everyone is walking, she has to run because she has to cover the last five months' journey. But she again losses her promotion. The reason she got was, "You are on leave for the last five months. How could you get the promotion!"

Basudha asked herself, "Forgiving birth to one child how could they take her two chances of promotion! She even did not take extra leaves." She started Screaming inside. Her heart wanted to ask all the people who think that giving birth to a child is an easy job then why they don't download it! How can they link about one woman's performance and maternity! It's nature that gives the womb to women only. If the men dominated world can give the option of downloading a kid from the Internet then only she will accept that she did not perform.

In this world, nobody hears the cries of a woman. Many women face post-maternity depression. People think that due to extra responsibilities women face these problems. But the real problem is the narrow thinking of the world who don't consider these aspects of women's life. Many Women are ready to participate in the running race with extra bags carrying on their backs as compared to men. But how fair Is it, if she was expected to run extra miles to complete the race! Achyut's moral support helped her a lot. She canceled her thoughts of resigning from her job.

Basudha wiped off her tears and Again she sets for a new inning. But in this world woman is the greatest enemy of another woman. Many have given an open statement that she is a selfish mother who doesn't care about her kid. This hurts Basudha's heart but she picked up all the stones and started building her path from that. She knows that if today she will lose her dreams then she will teach her kid to kill their dreams. An ambitious mother inspires her kids to grow in any kind of situation.

Basudha started working hard. At the age of thirty, she holds a motivation level like a 20 years girl. Where She enjoys her peaks there she saves sources for her valleys. She never stopped learning. She studied and practiced time management so she completes her office activities on time and spends quality family time at home. Now she became one department head. Subordinate likes her because she was not bossy. She was a good leader who believes that one good performing team is the team where all the team members contribute their hundred percentage performance.

Challenging the world is a tuff task. And if it's a lady then her situation bet worst. Times passes. Now Basudha a working woman who was self-esteemed like a twenty years old girl with twenty years of experience. One day Basudha got innovation to join the Women's day celebration as chief guest. She thought that what's her aim in life! What she got in her life! Her life was almost different from other girls in her family. Being the first is the toughest one. She won the battle that's why after her all-girls got chances to pursue their dream. Now the girls are engineers, doctors, lawyers.

At the event, Basudha got a question from a young lady, "Ma'am, how you fought against the world. Did not you fear to lose!" Basudha smiled and replied, "once my Dad said to me, " if you fear, your fear will win over you. So I tried to defeat my fear. And coming to fighting against the world! Even Goddesses were not able to escape from that, then how we humans can do! I studied in 'Lakshmi Purana', Lord Jagannath ordered Goddess Lakshmi not to go to the untouchable cast people's home, as Lord Balabhadra feels it inappropriate. But goddess Lakshmi fought for her rights till her husband and his elder brother felt their mistake."

Basudha again continued, "We belong to the world where we worship Goddesses like Shakti, who is one of the most powerful Hindu goddesses. She is even referred to as “The Great Divine Mother.” Goddess Durga is a Hindu warrior Goddess. Goddess Saraswati is the example of Knowledge. Goddess Kali is the goddess of strength and empowerment. Athena, a well-known Greek goddess represents many things including wisdom, courage, skill, and the arts in general. Then why we will see ourselves weaker. If we are correct then we should stand firm even if we stand alone.

If a woman is educated then society can be educated. So what struggle you face try to correct it from your own home. Educate your family to remove this gender discrimination from their dictionary. It is well said by J.K. Rowling-

"It takes a great deal of courage

to stand up to your enemies,

but even more to stand up

to your friends.”

Always remember that When there is no struggle, there is no strength.

Thank you