The Last Love Letter

He finished typing the letter and read through it one last time.

Dear Sheetal,

This is probably the last time I am writing to you. The past one and a half years have been great but then some great things are meant to end and our relationship was one such piece of greatness. It hurts me even as I jot down these words but it would hurt me a lot more if we were together. After all I have a wife and a three year old daughter and however much I try to convince myself I know they mean the world to me. They always will.

Sheetal I thought I will never forget you and I know you promised the same but we have to; the best way to respect our love is to end it. Love is a pure feeling, one that should bring joy and happiness to all concerned. It's like a cold glass of water after a long run in the scorching heat - everybody likes it, they have to. I know it's a bad analogy, but you of all people know that words have never been my friend. It took me a year of painful confinement before I spilled the beans on my true feeling for you and even then I did it with a card; a 10 rupees card to start something I thought was priceless. As you can see things haven't changed much. I still don't have the strength to tell you these things in person and am resorting to a cheap typed piece of paper to bring closure to this treasured relationship.

I spoke to Reena, told her everything; the derby, the vacations, the diamond ring, everything. I pleaded her to give me one last chance to mend this battered marriage and she agreed, and am I glad she did. When I look at Preeti and see her smile I realize how wrong I have been. The poor girl is a reflection of all things pure and I would never forgive myself if I destroy her childhood. I have seen friends who grew up in broken homes and they grew up really fast, much faster than their age and I can't deny my daughter a childhood.

The only way I can forget you is to start afresh and that is what I will try to do. I can't even afford to have you near my sight. Yes, you are that beautiful. It takes a smile of yours to drift the most steadfast of minds and it's important that I don't see that smile ever again. I have decided to move out of Bangalore. Actually, I decided that a month back. By the time you get this letter I will be far away from here. I have changed my mobile number, my e-mail id and anything else that would let you trace me because I know you will try and if you succeed I may not be able to resist the temptation and I just don't want to take that chance again. So forget me Sheetal. Forget that a Rakesh ever entered your life. Forget that we ever met in that restaurant. Every time you remember me think of the many fights we had. Think of the number of times I hurt you. You will realize that we should have done this thing a long time back. Use hate to forget me because honestly I deserve nothing better. I had no right to leave my family in the first place and yet I chose to do so. I have no right to leave you now and yet I choose to do so. You always said my mustache made me look creepy – well, I guess I am creepy. So please forget that you ever knew this creepy guy. That will help you, me, Preeti and Reena. I am really sorry. Goodbye Sheetal.

There is one more thing you need to know. Raj really cares for you. He always did, even before we met. He never told you and I don't think he ever will but I know it. I understand him better than anyone else and I could hear the words in his silence. If there has been anyone who stood by your side without asking a single question in these last three years, it was Raj. He never judged you, he never questioned you and he just loved you. Why else will he leave the promotion in US to be in this city? Why else will he pay twice the amount to get a flat that is nearer to your house? He loves you deeply, maybe even more than I ever did. A silent lover is the truest lover for his love has no language other than love itself. So if you can, give the guy a chance. You know he deserves it and you know he will not let you down like me. He has been a true friend to both of us and I am sure he will keep you happy.

I wish I could deliver this letter in person but that would make both of us weak. Memories have never a friend to breaking ties. So I am forced to end this wonderful relationship on an impersonal note again. I have never trusted the Indian Postal System (and I never will). However, it's absolutely important that you get this letter. So I am giving the envelope to Raj. He said he will meet you tomorrow and promised to deliver the letter to you. So thank him on my behalf for this last favor to our relationship.

Take care and have a great life and once again thank you for all the things you did to make the last two years so wonderful.

Love,

Rakesh.

Raj folded the letter and put it inside the envelope. Rakesh's original letter was still lying next to him. He did not change the contents of the original letter; he just added an extra paragraph. He knew he would never be able to tell Sheetal how he actually felt about her. This was the only way.