Smoky Affair

It was 4 in the morning and I hunted sleep or peace may be, with packet of cigarettes and a lighter in my hand. Fourteenth of August, same day, 2 years back, we moved into relationship on my promise of moving out of smoking. She feared our future because she cared for our present and she dreaded her past. I felt the grief and pain of her family on her father’s death because of lung’s cancer and so did I promise.

She was sweet, she was caring, and she was someone whom I felt as love. Those two years of togetherness were probably the finest days. We spent hours talking on phone. Those few days of meeting her were memories to cherish for rest of the time. Long distance relationship never looked that tough with her.

It wanted to and I tried for, but I failed. I failed to be a man enough, I failed my will power, I failed to keep my promise and I failed my love. I congratulated myself of being indecisive throughout my live and now for no self control. I didn’t know whether to boast on cheating her for two years of my promise mirage or regret of my loss of her. Whatever it may be but she was fortunate enough to move out from my fag life to some IITian fab life and I was happy or I had to be, I had tears of happiness or cry of loss, I was thrilled for freedom or thwarted for loneliness. Whatever it may be, it was THE END.