Life: The Ultimate Scam

You’re born, people clap. You walk, people clap. You turn one, they smash cake on your face like it’s an achievement. Fast forward, and suddenly, no one’s clapping anymore. Instead, they expect you to have a five-year plan, a high-paying job, and the ability to answer “Where do you see yourself in the next 10 years?” when you can’t even decide what to eat for dinner.

Then there’s adulthood—the real-life version of a trial subscription. First, everything seems fine, then suddenly, responsibilities auto-renew without permission. Bills, taxes, emotional baggage—you never signed up for this, but here you are.

And don’t get me started on expectations. Society wants you to be ambitious but humble, confident but not too much, independent but not rebellious. Basically, be everything, but not too much of anything.

But here’s the real kicker—no one actually has life figured out. The people you think have it all together? They’re probably just winging it with a straight face. So, might as well embrace the scam, take your coffee, and overthink in peace.