Lata

Circa 1950. In the dreamy village of Ardhaan, twilight broke through. It promised to be a bright sunny morning. Just the kind of a day Nagan was wishing for. He was a content man today. He bustled around waking up those who still held on to their sleep. He rushed towards the backyard where the cook and his assistants had begun preparations for the grand feast. Then he walked towards the courtyard. 

The courtyard was the hub of the activity this morning. Women in brightly coloured saris were busy with the final preparations for the wedding, even as children ran around. Nagan was searching for his wife amongst the crowd. She was nowhere to be seen. Muttering under his breath about his wife's carelessness on such an important day, he went in to look for her. 

There she was, in the corner of the room, shedding silent tears. What on earths she's crying for, Nagan seemed to have no patience. He scolded her in a terse voice. She wiped her tears and apologised. Their daughter was getting married, and she was overcome with emotions. Soon her little girl will leave for her in-laws home. It seemed just yesterday that she held her infant daughter in her arms. And today they were marrying her off. The mother was missing her daughter already. She wished she could hold on to her daughter a bit more longer.

"What are you crying for woman? It's time to be happy. Lata will soon be off our hands." Nagan had waited for this moment for long. His heart had sunk the day he had heard that his wife had given birth to a girl. He had wished for a boy. A girl was too much responsibility. Arranging for her wedding would be an uphill task, considering the umpteen expenses that go along with it. The parents were lost in thought, each looking in opposite directions. There was a summon from outside. The bridegroom had arrived. 

All of thirteen, Lata was but bewildered by the change. In all her innocence, she had expected to be accompanied by her mother, and was shocked when her mother bid her goodbye, sending her along with some strangers. How she cried. She wept and begged her mother to come with her. Then she wailed that she doesn't want to go. But no one cared for her sobs, let alone even hear what she was saying. Her mother was crying too. Her mother never cried when she sent Lata to school. But she was crying today. Does this mean that she would not be returning home? Lata was confused. She was hurt too. How could her mother just send her away? Did it mean that she was no longer wanted by her mother and family? Lata was confused. And who are these people, so many of them? Who is this man who was sitting next to her all this while? She was scared.

Lata had seen a few weddings take place. She knew them to be a celebration. Preparations start from days in advance. Relatives land in hoards. New clothes, a bit of jewellery and lot of pampering. She had seen her friends get married, and thought it was fun. She knew that when girls are married, they go to live in a new place. She had seen her friends leave after their wedding. She had heard the women folk talk of wedding as a great, grand achievement. She had even wondered when she would be getting married.

But nothing has prepared her for this. When people talk, they tend to focus more on the positives. It's human psychology. Whatever Lata heard about weddings was all the good stuff; the laughter, the festival-mood, the presents, the attention, the pampering, the praises. She had formed a mental picture of weddings as a gala celebration. It was mentioned in the passing that she would be going to her new home with her husband. But they didn't say that it would mean leaving everything behind. They didn't mention that the man they call her husband would be a total stranger. They didn't tell her that she would have to practically build her life all over again. Neither did they mention that her life, which she had taken for granted till that moment, would change beyond recognition.

One after another, Lata's three sons joined school. Her fourth child was a girl, and it seemed her husband was in no hurry to send her to school. When Lata asked him about it, he said, "There's no need of sending Gauri to school. You know the alphabets. Teach her the same. That would be enough. Then train her in housework. Afterall, girls are to be married off, sooner the better." 

That was all that Lata needed to hear. Anger, frustration and sorrow came rushing through. She didn't even realise that she had possessed these emotions. "Gauri will go to school. And so will I," she declared, much to the shock of her husband. And then all hell broke loose. 

"What do you even mean by that?" Lata's husband bellowed. "You want to go to school? You want to make a laughing stock out of me?"

Lata's in-laws too were furious, to say the least. She has lost her mind, was the verdict. Her husband warned her that if she raised the topic one more time, he will send her back to her parents. This was one threat that husband and families have been using on women for ages. They thought it would be a matter of shame for her if she was sent back, as if she's a discarded item, an unwanted or defective piece, and they used it to bully her into submission. 

Lata was wise enough to understand that this was a matter to be dealt with restrain. She shed a lot of tears, pleaded like never before, made umpteen promises to obey them, and cried that she had nowhere to go. The husband was pacified. He liked to see himself on a high pedestal. He told Lata that she was forgiven. She then meekly asked if Gauri could go to school. He nodded a reluctant yes.

That was all Lata needed for now. But if her husband was thinking that he was able to ascertain his dominance over his wife, he was mistaken. For Lata had finally and surely snapped out of her reverie. Her life flashed in front of her eyes. When faced with the possibility of her daughter facing the same prospects, she was taken aback. Her mother, she herself, and now her daughter. Could there be no end to this? 

Lata wanted change. Not just for herself, but her daughter as well. First step towards it was to enroll her daughter in school. It takes just one person to break a link of the vicious chain. And that one person paves the path for entire generations to come. Realisation came in pretty late for Lata, but when it did come, she acted. She made sure that her daughter was educated. It not only gives one confidence, but is a stepping stone for independence and self-reliance. Lata was also determined to make her daughter financially independent. The ability to earn a living is a great confidence booster. It drives away the fear of uncertain and insecure future. Standing on our own two feet makes all the difference.

The next step was to educate herself. Lata could read the alphabet before she her marriage. But she had neither read not written anything since then. Her desire to do so had rekindled. After the huge hue and cry the other day, Lata felt she should explore alternate avenues of learning. Everyday after school, she would ask her little girl what she learnt today. Her daughter became her teacher, as Lata brushed up on her forgotten fundamentals. She then slowly began to study her sons' textbooks. 

It took her around three more years to reach a certain level of proficiency. Then she had heard of a new lady teacher who had joined the school recently, and who had offered to teach women. This was a godsend opportunity, felt Lata. She approached her and told her that she would like to write the matriculation exam. The teacher promised to help her in all possible ways. The next hurdle was to deal with her adamant husband. She decided to take the bull by the horns.

"I am writing the matriculation exam as a private candidate," she announced. And before he could say anything, she continued, "I have decided. I will write the exam. I don't want my children to think of me as an illiterate woman. If your only concern is that you will turn into a laughing stock if people come to know that your wife is going to school, then you need not worry. I will only go to write the exam, and none will know about it, until you yourself tell anyone." She took a deep breath and walked out of the room, leaving him dumb with shock.

There, she did it. She defied her husband. It wasn't easy for Lata, but then nothing came easy in life. Her husband, though furious, did not object. He was confident that this was an uphill task for Lata, and she would surely fall flat on her face. He made matters difficult for her by burdening her with more housework. He would ask friends over to lunch, send invitations to relatives to come over for festival, demand that she prepare savouries and sweets, protest loudly if there was even a moment's delay in serving him and would find fault in practically everything that she did.

The more hurdles in her path, the more determined Lata was to overcome them. There's only one way to solve tough problems, grow tougher.

The transformation of Lata was dramatic. From a meek, submissive housewife, she turned into an outspoken advocate of women's education. The events that immediately followed her decision to write the matriculation exam were responsible for this change.

Her long days were followed by longer nights when she would burn the midnight oil in order to prepare for the exam. There was no help whatsoever to be expected from her husband and family members. And for this reason, she was more intent than ever. A dogged resolve is how her efforts could be described. Her attempt was not to prove her husband and family wrong, rather it was to prove herself capable. 

They are times when we ourselves are ignorant of our strengths. This was one such point in Lata's life. With a little help and encouragement from the school teacher, who would tutor her on odd days, and a lot of self motivation, Lata was able to achieve the unthinkable. She passed the exam. It came as a pleasant surprise for her and a rude shock for the husband. And what's more, the local press got wind of it. They ran a piece about her. They mentioned her husband too, adding that he had been a big support. No one told them that, yet they presumed it. They might have thought that no woman, a housewife and mother of four, would take such a giant leap without the go-ahead from her husband. 

He, on the other hand, was elated. Not because Lata had passed the exam, but because his name was printed in the newspaper. His contribution might have been nil, yet he claimed a large part of the credit simply because Lata bore his name. She was his wife, and that was her identity. 

"What are you so happy for? You didn't help me in any way?" Lata asked him flatly. He was taken aback, for she would never utter a syllable, let alone question him. 

"I gave you permission," he stammered. 

"Oh really?" she shot back. She gave him a look that seemed to pierce right through him. She was enraged, to say the least. There was much on her mind that she would have said. But she felt that her husband got the message. Moreover, she still had a war to fight, though she had won the battle.

Next stop for Lata was graduation. And this time, her husband didn't say a word. Meanwhile, she used this unexpected publicity to spread the word about the importance of girls' education. Lata went on to finish her graduation. It was indeed a huge milestone. She was not going to sit back and rest on her laurels. She took to tutoring girls. It was but the most appropriate thing to do. She would also counsel those parents who seemed reluctant to send their girls to school.

Lata's story is not just any story, it is an inspiration. It's also a comment on our society's dual standards. It points to the struggles of women, specifically those with regards to people's mindset. How much of their mentality has actually improved, is debatable.