Can You See Me?

I am the gentle breeze that ruffles the curtains of your bedroom. I am the flicker of the fairy lights on your brick wall. I am the polka dots in black on your white bedsheet. I am the creak of your cupboard door. I am the silhouette on your bathroom floor. 

I have been watching over you for months now. I gently smooth the frown lines on your forehead as you sleep. I remove your stained spectacle and place it quickly on your bedside table. I place my hand on your chest, feeling your heartbeats. You seem tense. You haven't been sleeping well over these months. 

I whisper in your ears the promises we made. I see you twitching after every broken vow. 

I trace my hand down your bare chest. You seem to shudder in cold. Does my touch make you uncomfortable? I cover you with the blanket you kicked onto the floor. Why are you so restless even in your sleep my love? 

I listen to the rhythm of your breathing. I don't remember how many nights have gone but it always feels like the first. I hear you murmuring in your sleep, something gibberish. Are you trying to confess something my love? 

I hear your phone beep and you wake up with a start. You check your phone and it's 2 am. You get up from bed covered in a cold sweat. You gulp water from your glass bottle like you had some nightmare. 

I come and stand beside you, you turn to me, and yet all you could see is your own self reflecting from the mirror. Once again you don't s

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ee me but you see through me. I have become an invisible spirit to you. 

Your phone beeps again, the screen lights up with a message. You read and smile, replying back in excitement. 

I feel the rage rising within me. I try to control it but I find it very difficult to tame. I swipe the phone away from your hands and I smash it into the mirror. 

Your reflection is broken and scattered now. One of the glass shards has injured your hands. 

"STOP IT! AM SORRY! PLEASE STOP! "

You scream in pain mixed with fear. 

My rage subsides. I smile as I see you whimper reaching out for some cloth to cover your wound. You wrap your hand with the same red dupatta I loved. 

You knock yourself out with some pain killers. 

The time is 4 am now. I watch your tear-stained face. I feel sad to have given you pain. I come closer to you and kiss your lips. I try to suck the breath out of you. 

Will it make me come alive? 

I will keep trying until your last breath, my love. I know you are sorry but your repentance comes from fear and not from the actual realization of guilt. 

Those hands that had once touched mine so lovingly strangled me to death. 

I have lost my body my love, the one marked with your love. You could not kill my soul though. 

Am here for you. Watching you. Waiting for you. 

Can you see me?