Can't write these days

I took pride in my hobby when I was in class 9.It was none other than writing. I loved to worn out fiction stories based on my experience, write poems and like that. I could write without hesitation, I wrote what I felt without judgement. Sky was pink at that time! I never cared for my grammar and vocabulary that much. The source of vocabulary at that time was my English classes and lessons. Even my SST subjects came handy for me. The first story was about a shy girl who got mocked and bullied upon by her classmates and teachers. It continues for a long time when she met a teacher who opened her blinds and gave her self confidence. I showed it to me friends and they praised it. From then I started to write more in my notebook. My notebook had this cute kittens with this 3D effect. It was worth 500 rupees ( it was crazy at that time to buy this overpriced notebook). I wrote 2 more fiction stories, my speech, my emotions. I was one of the top students in my class and naturally teacher's had a bit extra expectations on me. I remember how my Maths sir scolded me for scoring 75 marks out of 80; I felt devastated and wrote about it in my notebook. You see when you are sad you remember the similar sad moments in your life and start jotting down with this situation. I wrote it like hell crazy. Then at the end of 2019 I wrote the summary or the gist of the entire year. It was great! 2020 came the year of Corona where we stayed in house. At that time the rooftop was my outdoors for me. This night rooftop experience made me write 'Under the Darkness' poem. I used to write dairy at that time, and it was written in a thick cheap notebook. Along with that I tried to write a sci-fi, slice of life stories and even my real stories too. I wrote my thoughts and poem(Under The Darkness) too to shove out my anger, excitement. The sci-fi story was about how the world had turned upside down; not literally; it was how the world filled with goodness turned to evi

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l, messed dystopian society. Riots, quarreling was common; the protagonist was a very soft hearted person who never wanted to be bad. What was the reason behind it? 

this was the story. 

I wrote a poem when the school just got reopened ( Poker Face Conceals)Feelings, I know it is very embarrassing to write this but I had a strong affection towards a teacher( you know the thing right) I wrote a character sketch about him. Actually I had planned to write it in the month of January / February but wrote after my 10th boards got cancelled ( April and May)This was my first content where I put in a lot of effort. I just wanted to create an amazing draft and took a lot of amendments and proofreading. The diary which I wrote in came in handy and I wrote a gist of 2020 in about 4 /5 chapters. I think I should write it here maybe. As 11th approached, my father was against this hobby thing. He is not my enemy, he just wanted me to focus on my studies so that I clear NEET exam in one go( after 12th). Of course teenage blood never allows you to follow your elders. I wrote a fiction story, a poem(Jinx Torquilla).

 Let me mention a small thing. I had an amazing friend who had a passion for writing and she somehow found a publisher who can help submit our stories for an anthology ( Void the my Heart). I wrote the story Pnictogen Suffocation; about a toxic friend who made my life a living hell concluding with how I got rid of it and my life got better. My father just I was way to emotional crying for this shit girl's acknowledgement ( which wasn't true) I just wanted to write about hope. I lost it and decided I won't write as long I don't clear NEET. I did wrote Chilling Cream and Wind. But this was the last thing to write. I have cleared NEET but I can't write anymore. I have no ideas which persuade me to write. I am sorry that I left my hobby like that. Still, I will try my best to write again. 

I will give my best