She Lay Beside Him

As she lay beside him, she stared at the ceiling for the umpteenth time, she was looking for some intervention, some power that will suddenly engulf her and lift her off the bed and take her off to a world where she would feel at peace, be happy and didn’t have to worry about the cares of her world. Wasn’t it how it happened in the fairy tales she read as a kid? Fairy Tales! What a rotten word, she sighed. She was suddenly distracted from her thoughts by the sound of his snoring. It didn’t irk her anymore. She got so used to it in these 12 years. What irked her more was the void that grew bigger as the years sped by. She got up as she gasped for breath, reached the balcony and started sobbing uncontrollably. She tried to cup her hands over her mouth, not to awake her two kids sleeping in the adjacent room.

 She beat her chest a few times, thinking it will shoo the gnawing pain in her heart but nothing happened. She could feel her eyes getting puffed up. She started wiping her runny nose on her t-shirt. After a while, she felt a slight relief creeping in. She went to the washroom closed the door carefully and splashed her face with water and blew her nose. Wiping her face, she padded back to her bedroom as the snores got louder. She lay down, closed her eyes and started counting…1, 2, 3……211, 2..,…..

Images of her friend, Sandhy’s weeping face shrouded her. Sandhy had recently found out that her husband was having an affair. Her sobbing face, the pain in her voice, the anguish she was going through all began to replay in her mind. Kiri consoled herself thinking, her situation was so much better when compared to Sandhy. “So what if I feel lonelier after my husband ravishes my body each night like a maniac. What if he never spends time with me? What if there is no bond between us; what If I still can’t bring myself to love him after having 2 kids with him. At least he is not cheating”. All these thoughts though painful, were slightly comforting. How many stay in such marriages where you don't love your husband and feel so lonely in it but you look at the brighter side of it and move on. She rummaged her brain to remember that famous quote from "Gone with the Wind"….. “What was that lady's name?” She couldn’t recall now…215,216,217…….

 "After all, tomorrow is another day!" 

The alarm beeped, Kira sprang from her bed and rushed to start the busy day awaiting her.