MIND TALKS

It’s 8 o’clock in the morning and I think a bit early to write about my day. However, I have made a decision not to go for work and hence, I have to start with something. The reason(s) I am not going is, firstly- it’s raining too heavy. Secondly- I don’t want to. Third- due to humid climate, my clothes aren’t dry yet. Forth- I woke up a little late. Fifth- I had my umbrella vanished straight from my home since yesterday. And finally- something came into my mind that made me firm about not letting myself get enslaved.

When I woke up, as I said it was already late. I mean I couldn’t make it to my office on time no matter how hard I try. I went into the bathroom and looked up into the mirror at myself. This is the routine that my body follows involuntarily when I am still in my dizzy state prior to my glass of lukewarm water along with Aloe Vera juice. I looked into my eyes as always and got my consciousness. I adjusted my retina in order to have a better view. The person in the mirror raised his right eyebrow trying to question me about my stare.

“Why are you staring at me?” he asked.

“Why are you doing the same?” I replied.

“Well, you were the one to start.” he answered a bit puzzled.

“And how did you know that?” I asked with a smirk.

“Oh! Don’t play this game, you know who started it.” He said wryly.

“Then you might also know why I am doing this, right?”

“Why? I don’t know. How can I probably know?” His voice was no longer rigid.

“You know exactly why I am staring at you now and you know exactly why I stare at you every single day” I sounded hoarse.

“Ok, cut it off. I got to get ready for office” he said and looked away in distaste.

“How far can you run? How long are you going to ignore? I shall get you here each day.”

“I am not running away from anything. I just gotta go to work on time.” He looked tired.

“And what about me? I hate living inside this unambitious and hopeless body.”

“Oh! Really? And what you wish to do by not working?” he sounded sarcastic.

“Look, I am not here to work! I am dying inside. You got to do something or else you shall be the breathing machine just like others.”

“Look, I like my work…”

“Haaa! Who you think you are lying to?” I just can’t bare lies anymore.

“Ok, tell me one thing, have you heard a man working from 9:00 to 6:00 becoming a millionaire?” I further asked.

“Hmmm…”

“No! History has always witnessed men who took themselves out of their mundane work and live out their dreams.”

“Yup! True! Also, history has witnessed men who got bankrupt following their dreams. Anyone can tell that the number of unsuccessful exceeds than those who got successful.”

“This only shows your unwillingness to take risk” I just tried to make a point.

“Just shut up! Enough! You know that I am not a coward. You know the amount of risk I took.” He sounded aggressive.

“The fact is, you took the risk just of not doing the job. You didn’t try to strive for your dream you lazy boy! What you truly did is writing the prologues of your-want-to-write-novels. You are a looser.”

I could see a drop of tear rolling down my eyes. I couldn’t guess why exactly that tear came down for. Did it came out of frustration or out of regret? Am I angry or depressed? Or both angry and sad? However, for one thing I was concerned that I shall not let myself down. Not anymore. Hence, I decided to dedicate this day, to my dream. For what my mere existence gets its meaning.