Letting Go (Chapter-34)

Serena

Serena stood stock-still inside the entrance of HQ’s Gastropub. She had told Patrick that it wasn’t necessary to pick Jilliana up until midnight, but he insisted they get there by 11:30 pm. Serena lingered beside an empty two-top as she watched Patrick’s deliberate steps toward the bar, wishing her sister had the intuitive sense to turn away from the man she was brazenly flirting with.

But Jilliana didn’t. Though Serena could hardly see them in the dimly lit room, she could tell from her sister’s stance that she was too captivated by the man sitting across from her to notice Patrick. Three minutes passed - though it seemed more like ten - before Serena saw her sister push violently back from the counter, whip around, and face Patrick. She tried to catch a glimpse of the man Jilliana had been speaking to, but could only see his back as he swiftly turned and walked toward the restroom.

Patrick must have said no more than two words to her sister before walking back to the entrance.

“We’re going,” he said firmly, forcing the door open with the palm of his hand.

“But -- Pat!” Serena raced after him, “we can’t leave her. She can’t walk home alone.”

Patrick paused midstep. He took a deep sigh, lifting his shoulders up as he inhaled and letting them fall heavily with his exhale.

“We’re not,” he turned to face Serena, “I’m pulling up the car.”

Serena had never been a “third wheel” before, probably because hanging out with friends was not something she did often. But as she sat in the back, taking in the awkward silence filling the front half of the car, she seriously considered walking home. It felt as though there were miles separating them from their destination when there was only a block.

“It’s not a big deal, Pat,” Jilliana finally broke the silence, “It’s part of the job. Flirting, I mean. It means nothing.”

Serena glanced at Patrick and could tell, even in the darkness, that he was irritated.

“Can you please just say something?” Jilliana spoke in a low voice.

Serena watched Patrick’s grip on the steering wheel tightened. He slowed down the car.

“Jills, it’s not about the guy,” he said, keeping his eyes straight ahead, “It’s just that I know we haven’t--”

“Pat, I --”

“Just,” Patrick lifted a hand to stop Jilliana from continuing, “let me finish. I know we haven’t set boundaries, so I can’t really be upset.”

Serena looked out of the window, God, get me out of here. Why is he driving so slowly?

“I know, I know,” Jilliana’s voice quivered slightly as she spoke, “we haven’t been together a single day yet and I’ve already fucked up.”

“That’s - let’s not,” Patrick glanced back at Serena, who gave him a small shrug before turning her focus back to the window. Two more houses...just two more...

“Let’s not talk about this right… now,” Patrick said as they approached the apartment.

“No, no,” Serena yanked her seatbelt off and leaned between the seats, “How about you guys stay in here, talk for a bit. I’ll head up to the apartment and wait.”

She turned to Jilliana, who had her arms folded and head turned toward the window, then back to Patrick.

“Seriously. You guys should talk in private. I’ll be fine.”

Patrick switched his focus to Jilliana, then back to Serena.

“You sure that’s okay?” He said, separating his house key from his keyring, “We’ll be right out front.”

“Yea, yea,” Serena took the key from him and opened the car door, “Call me when you’re done. I’ll come down to let you in.” She rushed out of the car, shut the door, and walked toward the apartment building’s entrance.

Though there was very little space between the car and the entrance, Serena felt uneasy walking alone in the dark. She glanced back at the car and considered turning back but decided against it when she saw Jilliana’s arms gesticulating wildly toward Patrick in the front seat. Serena quickened her pace and was at the large entrance door of the building within seconds.

There was very little light surrounding the area; the lamp above the door had nearly gone out, so it took her several attempts to find where the key fits into the lock. As Serena turned the key, a blaring sound erupted from behind her, causing her to release her hand and spin around.

“Goddammit!” She leaned back against the door and shot her eyes toward the flashing lights of a car parked several houses down. Just a car alarm, she thought, taking a deep breath, just a stupid car alarm. Serena turned around, pulled the key from the lock, and used all of her weight to heave the door open.

The car alarm stopped the moment she was inside. Serena looked up at the building’s main stairwell directly in front of her, which led to the first floor of apartments. It was then, as she reached for the railing, that she realized she’d never heard the loud thud of the door closing behind her. She stepped back from the staircase and turned, expecting to see the door had closed without her hearing it. But the moment she turned, her ability to move - to breathe - to think - abandoned her. The door was being held open, leaving less than a foot of space between the door and the doorway. Someone must have caught it from the outside when she opened it. Someone was behind me, she thought, someone’s been following me… this whole time.

A memory flashed into Serena’s mind as she stared at the open door. He had left the closet door open, she remembered, feeling her body go cold, I didn’t understand why. I thought for a second that maybe he’d forgotten to close it… But he doesn’t forget. Edmond never forgets, and never makes mistakes. She felt an instinctive urge to escape - but when her mind told her to turn and run up the staircase, she couldn’t get her legs to move out of their petrified, locked position. He was hiding behind the closet door the entire time… Serena tried to push the memory from her mind, but the memory was too vivid, too strong to suppress. And when I took a step out of the closet, he grabbed me by the hair so violently that I could hear my screams echo off of the walls as he dragged me back in… Serena instinctively reached a hand to her head. The moment her fingertips grazed her skull, Edmond appeared from the outside and swiftly stepped in, closing the door heavily behind him.

Serena jumped back with a gasp, hearing the clink of Patrick’s key as it fell to the cement floor. Her heart was pulsing so quickly that she swore he could hear it. She thought, for a moment, that she was experiencing a nightmare. She had imagined this moment so many times - fantasizing what she’d say, or how she’d act, but never truly knowing how she would respond when she saw Edmond Rowen again. I’ll run, she used to think, I’ll just run as quickly as I can and not stop until I’ve lost him. But her entire life was a run, she soon realized, as the years passed. I’ll curse at him, scream, yell, she’d predict, playing out scenarios in her mind of what she’d scream, but knowing ultimately that her words were powerless. I’ll kill him, would be her final thought. But as she stood before Edmond Rowen, Serena’s mind went completely blank; no words, no thoughts, no internal dialogue emerged to provide solace or ease. All that existed between them was the sound of Serena’s racing heartbeat and the terrifying, familiar click of Edmond’s lighter as he ticked it at his side, releasing sparks of fire into the darkness.

“Hello, Serena,” Edmond said, “It’s been a while.” He clicked his lighter again, this time holding his thumb so the flame lingered, then lifted it to illuminate his face.

He’s… bald, Serena thought, analyzing his features, and where’s… where’s his birthmark?

“I’ve made some changes,” he tilted his head and broadened his smile, “what do you think?” He took a step closer, causing Serena to instinctively step back. I should scream, she thought, someone in the apartments upstairs will hear. But Serena could hardly gather enough breath to make a sound. She took another step back and felt the base of the stairs at her heels. Then run, Serena reached a hand back and gripped the stair railing, just turn and run.

“Oh, Serena, don’t be frightened,” Edmond took another step closer, drawing the fire from his lighter closer to her face.

Run, just run! Serena thought, gripping the hand railing tighter, this is your only chance - RUN! But as she lifted her right foot to the bottom stair, a loud, obnoxious ring radiated from her left pocket.

Edmond’s satisfied expression dropped. He shifted his eyes down toward the sound of her ringing phone and released his thumb from the lighter.

Serena’s eyes widened. Damn it. God damn it. She glanced down to her pocket, though she couldn’t see anything in the darkness. Should I answer? Let it ring? But before she could determine the best course of action, Edmond pulled her forcefully away from the stairs so violently that he nearly knocked the wind out of her. He stood behind her, locked one arm across her chest, and placed a hand over her mouth, putting the taste of alcohol on her lips.

“You do exactly as I say,” Edmond said, spitting in her ear, “or I’ll kill you and your sister,” he clicked his lighter with his free hand and brought it close to Serena’s face, “and you know I can.”

Serena’s stomach dropped at these words. She nodded quickly, wincing as he dug his fingernails into her cheek.

“You’re going to answer that phone,” Edmond said, releasing his thumb from the lighter, “put the conversation on low-volume speaker, and repeat exactly what I say.”

Serena reached a shaking hand into her pocket and pulled out her phone, revealing a screen so bright that it was blinding at first. She pushed the “accept” button and felt Edmond’s grip tighten as she lifted the phone and pressed the speaker button.