I Wish

I think we should be more conscious and aware of the little opportunities we get and enjoy them till they last. This is better than grieving upon them when they are gone.
I didn’t enjoy the moments I got to spend with my grandparents and now I wish I could turn back the clock and bring back the wheels of time to a stop.
When I was sixteen, I was shifted to Malana to live with my grandparents after my parents died in a car crash. Malana was a solitary village situated in the hills of Himachal Pradesh which was shadowed by the peaks of Chandrakhani and Deotibba. The villagers’ faith and religion did not allow foreigners to go, even touch the walls of the temples of the area and hence foreigners were kept on the outskirts of the village. I, a foreigner for the villagers and unaware of the fact once went to a Temple which resulted in a dispute between Dada and the villagers on the steps of Maa Durga's Temple. After a lot of resistance from Dada I was recognized as a native of Malana. But from that day Dada had to suffer because of me. We were isolated from the rest of the village. People would ignore us except Ramu Bhaiya, a shopkeeper and my friend.
Coming from a city, I had huge demands which Dada would never refuse. On my 19th birthday Dada told me that my uncle has invited me to live with him in Delhi. I was overjoyed because I wasn't really comfortable in the environment of the village. But later I overheard him asking Dadi whether my uncle will allow me to live with him. So I wasn't invited and was being thrown out! I thought that Dada considered me a burden and was trying to get rid of it. I was full of emotions. Was it my mistake that I was an orphan? Am I that bad? Doesn't Dada love me? Now I also was full of hatred for Dada. At the railway station I didn't even turn back to say goodbye. From the coach I could see that Dadi’s eyes were full of tears. For me it was all fake and just a formality.
Life with my uncle was very easy going and smooth. I was even given a motorbike. I lived with him for three years after which I got a job and brought a house of my own.After some days I had shifted to the new house, I got the news of Dadi's death but I didn’t bother. A year after her funeral I received a letter from Ramu Bhaiya telling me about Dada's demise and the urgency to meet me. I invited him to my house to stay for two-three days. For the first two days we talked about the old days but while returning he told me something I should have known earlier. He told me that after the dispute in the temple nobody was willing to relate to Dada and sell stuff that's why he had to buy things at double the rate. His pension wasn't enough to meet my huge demands and raise me up that’s why he had to sell most of his land and valuables. He decreased his expenditures to raise mine. Dadi even had to part from her wedding jewelleries. Bhaiya told me that all the selling were done by him and Dada even made him swear not to tell me about all this. He told me that I was sent to live with my uncle because Dadi didn’t want me to see them depending upon Bhaiya for a house to live in.
So many questions answered yet none of them satisfy me. My grandparents did so much for me and I have been so cold. I never spoke a word of cheer and love for them. I neglected them when they needed me the most. I want to cherish those moments but it's too late. This huge mistake of mine can't be undone. All I want to say is 'Thank You’....