Father Was A Stranger

Stacked amongst your seeds I was,

Out of you, I emerged, into the womb a sprout I was

I was a result of the choices you both made, coming out of wedlock was your choice, not mine,

So was my appearance, my identity, my history got from your genes and beliefs, not mine

Humans got two primary feelings, happiness and sadness,

But Growing up I was often frolicking around just one and it wasn't happiness

The only thing stranger than you not being around was the love you didn't give,

And it stings a little knowing you didn't even have a reason being a deadbeat

The only picture I have of you is a picture of your back while you were walking out of my life,

And no matter how many good memories I have accumulated over time, no matter how many sweet moments I have lived over the years, your picture is the only thing I see in my head before going to bed every night

Unimaginable was the things your absence brought,

Unacceptable was the thing you did to a young and innocent one 

Your demise was as a laxative, flushing out every anger and hate for you in my bowels,

Suddenly, I realized just how much I've missed out on, how much I've been robbed of seeing you in a wooden box and dressed up in all white like a lifeless guardian angel

Yet, I don't know which will hunt me more in life, either not having you in my life,

Or writing this while sitting at a Father's and child get together on a Father's day-night knowing my Father was a stranger.