Discord and Harmony

The perpetual nature also insinuates that it carries changes with it. Yellow turning leaves smile at me as I pass by the old school road where I spent fifteen years counting the rows of trees and the innumerable leaves which shed with the changing seasons. Our stories are like these trees, I figured when I changed the schools for the first time. I was amongst those trees standing in the autumn, waiting for my leaves to shed all at once. Adjusting to new things isn't a task we all excel at; maybe only a few accept changes while others like me are just whining about it, knowing that it won't come back. 

Last year when I changed my school for better study purposes, I didn't know I would be missing such a huge part of myself. I went every day to a place I wasn't familiar with, and I didn't want to be familiar with it. Our human psychology says that when we get attached to things, we don't accept that they are gone, once separated. We hold onto them, not letting other things come close to us, even though they are not as bad as we think them to be. We just get used to the normal ways of life we had been leading, not considering how a new normal can change how you see your life. 

I had sworn not to make new friends, but the feeling of loneliness crept up to me when I had to spend eight hours a day at school without a companion to call out as a friend. The affection of my old friends began to deepen, perfectly proving the point that distance makes love grow fonder. I didn't like the new mates I was studying with, or maybe I just chose not to like them. With ignorance being the top of my attitude towards others, I led the victim's life, unknown that I was a victim of my mind who denied accepting what was the new normal to me. 

The lone old tree with all the dead leaves whistling in the air, not allowing the fresh leaves to sprout, lamenting on the separation with the companions he wished to stay forever with. One day, the wind came rushing, and the tree shivered with the cold, wishing if the leaves were there to help him with the freezing climate, to cover him, to soothe him, to provide him with the warmth he had always dreamt of. 

Likely, whenever I had to sit alone and eat my lunch with no one but the plain walls, I thought the food would have tasted better if my friends had been there. That's when a girl from my back tapped on my shoulder and shared some chocolates with me. I was hesitant, but now when I think about it, I am happy I took them. We started talking, her friends became my friends, and soon the void over my heart was taken over by the joy of being loved. The silent stares with the white walls are replaced by non-stop talks. The realization struck me hard that they were no different from the old mates I had; I only filtered them with my eyes of judgment and my thoughts of not molding myself in the new school life.

Only if the acceptance had crept in earlier, the autumn would have passed a little quicker. Not only I understood that spring takes time to come, but also that embracing changes is the strength of one's soul. 

Now that when I sit with my new friends looking at the big old tree outside our classroom window, I realize that I am not an autumn tree with shriveled leaves but a tiny leaf of the trunk of acceptance. Waiting to be embraced by the new normal, breaking the mind's shackles that kept me from all the fun of acceptance.