The Metamorphosis Of Myself

The doctor reads my test reports

And says, everything’s normal. 

I wonder if he would’ve said the same, 

Had it read, 

Serotonin level: Low 

Anxiety level: High

Existential crisis level: High

Panic attack count: High

Ending of life thought count: High

They tell me, this is just a phase,

Not knowing, my whole life has been just a phase,

Of trying to erase traces of my sadness.

They tell me, this too shall pass, 

Not knowing, I have waited my whole life for this to pass, 

And happiness to arrive.

Nobody read the suicide note 

Depression wrote on my face,

Nobody saw me choking on despair,

Or emptiness fastening its noose on my will to live,

My life made no fuss about ending itself.

Now, every day is a funeral, 

Where I mourn the loss of my old self,

Yet no one attends, 

Because someone told them, 

What doesn’t kill you, makes you stronger...