Why Did You Meet Me ?

 

Why did you meet me?

                                    A Love Story

 

 

                              Love Comes on this earth

                                  When you said me

                                        I love you

                               ( Though very casually )

 

 

 

 

                              Dedicated to a girl

                                Who loves me?

                                     Spiritually

 

                                                 Author Rajiv Anand

 

                                    CHAPTER-1

 

        ”Don’t leave me, I need you to live,” said Ruma.

Rajesh was glad to hear this, never, he assured her. About nine months had been taken by Ruma to say, “Don’t leave me, I need you to live.”

        The events that took place between Rajesh and Ruma in these nine months, however, were not very significant but interesting one.

        They, Rajesh and Ruma came nearer to each other because of one thing that is common between the two and that is, “loneliness,” both were lonely in their own spheres. They, Rajesh and Ruma felt something missing in them even in midst of their respective families.

        Rajesh had his parents, brothers, sisters but the pang of loneliness was always there in his heart and what was more perplexing was that he could not explain it to anyone.

        The same was the situation of Ruma, she too had parents, sisters, and brother but no one could be able to understand her loneliness she was suffering from.

        No member of their respective families tried to understand them. Always misunderstood by the members of their respective families. Thus, alienation began and both Rajesh and Rumahave drifted afar from their respective family members.

  

                                 CHAPTER-2

 

        One fine morning Ruma caught sight of Rajesh near a shop situated in a street of a town where both live.

        Ruma was idle after passing her graduation and Rajesh was busy in preparing for various competitive examinations especially for Indian Civil Services and after doing hard work until midnight Rajesh used to go for walk in the morning i.e. 9.30 AM to 10 AM. It was the time Rajesh felt himself fresh.

        Rajesh was in habit of walking slowly with both hands in his trousers’ pockets stooping his head downward feeling the warmth of the sunshine and freshness of morning air.

        Ruma has been watching her regularly and she was impressed by his attitude because Rajesh never noticed someone pretty like Ruma was watching him and his nonchalant attitude got Ruma attracted towards him.

        It is nature of the girls that if someone passing does not notice the girls, they take it otherwise and in reaction they either get attracted or get detracted.

        Ruma came to know about Rajesh’s helping attitude from locals and decided to make Rajesh her friend, philosopher and guide as she too was interested in Indian Civil Services Examination.

        One morning Ruma followed Rajesh and when Rajesh stopped near a shop, she went there and asked him that she wanted to build her career with his help and guidance, would he help her ?

 

                                          3.

 

Rajesh readily agreed to guide her and therefore started the regular meeting of two lonely souls. However, both were lonely for their own reasons.

        Rajesh, though, a lonely person but his loneliness was because of his being honest to the core. In fact, he was a misfit in this evil minded society. He helped those who needed help and took nothing in return and selfish persons misunderstood him and the more he helped the more he became lonely. In brief he could not adjust in a realm of corrupt people. He used to be ready to help needy who came across him. Several needy students had been taught by him free of cost and got permanent house and hearth.

        Rajesh in a corrupt society never got any reward of his hard labour which he did in the field of education. He rigorously self-studied for civil services and reached to the level of interview but finally could not get through. He competed in state public services and faced the interview but could not succeed because he was smarter than the interviewers. But despite that he was not frustrated at all and remained optimistic. He always thought human proposes God deposes like man proposes woman deposes.

   Later on h he wielded his pen for freelance writing and whenever he wrote, his pen vomited fire and venom regarding the ills of society and malady of politics.

        Rajesh believed in a society free from all evils and politics free from selfish persons. He used to quote Oscar Wild’s famous saying, “ Politics ifs the last refuge of the scoundrels.”

 

                                         4.

 

        Rajesh was against injustice and by the power of the pen, he got recognition but he was a rebel in every way, a misfit in the truest sense of the term. “Compromise is corruption,” he believed and always remained unadaptable.

 

                                 CHAPTER-3

 

        When Rajesh met Ruma, he soon discovered that she was also suffering from loneliness, of course, the reason unknown to him.

        However, Rajesh felt pain whenever he met her to counsel. Rajesh always inspired her to write poems, which she used to write from her childhood but she did not respond correspondingly.

        When Rajesh started inspiring her in order to be optimistic in life, Ruma digressed and told him that her being eldest in the family, she had much responsibility towards her younger brother and two sisters and of course towards her parents.

        Rajesh tried hard to delve deep into her cause of loneliness and gradually he came to know that when Ruma was at school, she fell in love and when she became matured, her love life was shattered because her lover had brutally cheated her physically as well as emotionally. She was injured both physically and mentally.

 

                                       5.

Physical scars were healed up with the passage of time but emotional and mental scars were discernible on her face yet.

        She was not only emotionally but physically assaulted by her lover but her lover had ditched her when time had come to get married.

        She could not sustain her lover’s unfaithfulness; the signs of pain and loneliness were easily visible on her face.

        Ruma was not very beautiful but was attractive. Her eyes were as large as they could be compared with a tranquil lake in which one can see the grief of her lost love life.

        When Rajesh met her, her eyes were always full of teary water. Rajesh used to tell her, “Keep the tear within your eyes as it is precious.

        Ruma felt happiness because there was someone who cared for her tears.

        Whenever Rajesh met her, he could not endure a grim look on her not so beautiful but attractive innocent face. Rajesh became restless after knowing Ruma’s past sad love life. He felt more sympathy for her and started taking much care. Gradually Rajesh started persuading her to share her sorrow and loneliness with him and when Ruma got confidence over Rajesh, She confessed what has happened to her right from the school days to her college days.

 

 

                                           6.

 

                                   CHAPTER-4

 

        Ruma told her sad story to Rajesh slowly but steadily as it was very hard to recall painful memory.

        She started her story…since her childhood she felt alienated from her father. Being eldest among four children, she used to think that she needed her father’s care, love and sympathy as other child of her age got but her father being work alcoholic proved non-caring father rather she had been abused and beaten off  and on by her father, especially when her father was in state of intoxication.

        In course of time, she attracted towards a neighbour boy, who was flirt and characterless but Ruma did not know then. Gradually she had been trapped in his love-trap and became victim of her so-called lust. She was emotionally cheated and got physical relation. She got physical relation with her lover when she even did not know what it was. However, her lover was cunning fellow, was in habit of flirting, and had physical relations with many innocent girls.

        When Ruma came to know about her so-called lover and his love-lust relationship, it was like bolt from the blue for her. Ruma was emotionally shattered, her dreams turned into ashes.

        When Rajesh heard her confession, he was moved so much that he embraced her and consoled her.

        Ruma was weeping but with joy. She found a person who could understand her.

                                     

                                                7.

        In fact, she used to think that no one could understand her and that was the reason of her loneliness. When she found one who could understand, her joy knew no bounds. It was the special occasion for her and she celebrated the same by reciting an extempore poesy, thus

                “On the way of my dreams,

                    There was no one;

                    To show me the right way,

                    I think you are the one

                    For whom I waited,

                    You are the one

                    With merits aggregated,

                A person who could fulfil my dreams,

                Yes, you are the one,

                Who could show me the right way

                 The way leading to my dreams. ''

 

 

                                                8.

 

                                      CHAPTER-5

        Rajesh, on the other hand, was thankful to Ruma since she was the only one who understands his worth emotionally and educationally.

        Now Rajesh was somewhat satisfied that he was able to lessen Ruma's sorrow, if not fully, of course partially. After all, “it is very hard to make a dejected lover happy.''

        When Ruma tried to come nearer to Rajesh, he used to say, Look Ruma, “beware of the man whose God is in the sky.'' She never understood the saying but never asked Rajesh to explain the above said saying.

        Ruma was not yet made herself understood that a person like Rajesh who is too good to be digested, '' (Ruma used to tell this to Rajesh) could be her forever.

        It was also a fact that until then Rajesh had not developed love for her, however, he had hearty sympathy for Ruma. Rajesh being self-centred rather introvert, did not want to get married but Ruma nurtured  a dream of getting married to Rajesh and for that, she had been trying very hard to come nearer to Rajesh.

        Ruma was preparing for civil services Examinations being English literature and history as her subjects.

        Rajesh used to come at noon to get her prepared for her civil services mains examinations and taught her seriously.

        One day Ruma in her joyous mood asked Rajesh, Sir, How can you explain writer's pity?

 

 

                                              9.

        Rajesh got it and told her, look Ruma, the answer of the question could be understood by an example like this, “a guitar is made out of wood and wood comes from a tree. The tree would not feel happy that its wood made into a guitar would later contributed to the melody and harmony of a great musical composition. The pity of the writer is similar to that of a living tree.''

        Ruma could not hope that Rajesh would make her understood with such a great example. She once again felt tremendous attraction for Rajesh.

        Ruma again asked an important question several times asked in the examination of English literature, why it is said that it is certainly not a contented soul that takes to creative writing ?

        Rajesh answered thus, “One who leads a life in all its fullness would rarely think in terms of make-believe worlds. One wonders whether it is not an incomplete personality that attempts to write or portray imaginary worlds. Some well-known writers have been sublimated by some void to the other. Dante had his Beatrice, Shakespeare had his Dark Lady, Leonardo da Vinci had his Monalisa, H.G.Wells had his bad health, and recently Hawkins has his quadriplegic disease. Thus, it is certainly not a contented soul that takes to creative writing but one afflicted with anguish and loneliness.''

        Ruma got it very easily ad again felt attraction not as a person Rajesh was but on his way to teach and to get, her understood the answer with such a clear concept. Ruma's attraction towards Rajesh. 

 

                                             10.

Answer but because the way he answered, the simplest way to conceptualise.

        One last question, sir, told Ruma and she asked the very  cryptic question as, “What is the difference between word and smile from the standpoint of literature?

        Rajesh thought a while and answered, thus, “Word is a symbol of bundle of emotions and each word evokes different semantic reactions on the part of readers while smile is also an emotion but physical '' and by giving final touch to the answer, Rajesh ended it by asking a question, “is not the smile of Monalisa more solacing than hundreds of writings on love?

        Ruma was awe-struck by the answer given b by Rajesh.

        Beautiful, Sir, I never thought that such a beautiful and so clear cut difference can be had of the words, like, 'word' and 'smile'.

        At last, Ruma said sorry sir, in fact, there was no such question in the syllabus of literature.

        Rajesh told her, he knew that but when you asked a question, it was my duty to answer and got you satisfied.

        Reading session was completed, Rajesh sipped a cup of tea, which had been brought in by Ruma’s mother, and thereafter Rajesh wanted to go and started going. Ruma followed her to her house gate and asked her, sir, why did not you write a novel or story? You had the potential to write, sir.

        Rajesh told her that tomorrow he would answer her question.

 

 

                                               11.

 

                                        CHAPTER-6

        Next day Rajesh was not feeling well and could not able to go to Ruma's house.

        Ruma was continuously watching the wall clock and looking towards gate. She felt time stood still, every moment was seemed as long as a year. She was sitting standstill over the portico and waited eagerly. In the meantime when the gate was moved, she felt her heart was beating very fast, she went to the gate with a hope to see Rajesh outside but he did not come rather a Postman came to give her a registered letter. She received the same and after tarring the envelope she found her admit card for mains examination scheduled to be held next month. She placed the envelope on t the table of her room and thought if sir were there, he would be excited after seeing her admit card of civil services mains examination. However, time passed however very slowly and Rajesh did not come.

        Ruma was very upset that day. She was thinking about her past life and its consequences. Her position was very precarious. She had already been defamed because of her previous love affairs in the eyes of her family members as well as in the orthodox society. Being a member of cast-ridden society, Ruma could not be got married because of her defamation.

        She could not expect from people of her society to think rationally and logically, what to say about them who could not understand that love is the most natural thing and to be betrayed in love is equally natural.

 

                                             12.

 

        There is nothing wrong in loving and be loved. And as far as physical relation between an unmarried girl and boy is concerned, of course, it is wrong at least in traditional society but in order to decide about one's character, it is not the only yardstick. After all live-in relationship has been accepted by the society as well as by the court of Law, in which unmarried male and female can not only live but also can make physical relations as well.

        Ruma was drifted afar in the streams of her daydreaming and she came back, when her mother scolded her once again for sitting idle. Ruma's mother was however very cooperative to her daughter but sometimes she became anxious by seeing the habit of Ruma is daydreaming. If not scolded Ruma used to sit idle for a long hours. At last after being scolded two or three times by her mother, Ruma went to the bathroom and bathed. When she came out of bathroom, she was looking fresh no doubt but emotionally she was very upset because of Rajesh's absence.

        Ruma could not sleep  until midnight; different horrible thoughts were disturbing her. Why did not Rajesh come today? People of the locality told him something fishy about her. Or he decided not to come again? And so on and so forth.

        Actually, Ruma was very apprehensive about her past love affair. What was most disturbing for her was her physical relationship with her ex-lover. She always thought like the other member of a society that her love-affair and

 

                                             13.

 

The physical relation could be a hindrance for a special person like Rajesh to love her and that was the reason for her disturbance.

        Rajesh too in his illness not felt well but more painful for him was Ruma's beautiful eyes and innocent face, which came up before his eyes as he shut his eyes. He was equally disturbed in the night.

        Next day though he was not fully well but he could not resist the temptation to go to Ruma's house and he went there before the stipulated time.

        Ruma after hearing his calls felt tremendous joy but did not show it and came out from her room with seriousness on her face.

        Rajesh was feeling too a great joy inside his heart but he too did not show it and made his face serious-looking.

        Both Ruma and Rajesh were pretending seriousness though both were tremendously happy, both sat down and a table was in between them.

        Ruma broke the silence by asking the same question asked a day before yesterday.

        Rajesh got it and told her, I might not be having the potential of a Chetan Bhagat or A Rabindra Singh but the needling experiences that such people went through is a deterrent for a person like me, who would like to have a go at writing.

        Chetan Bhagat was looked down upon for not being a university wit and the completely literary world refused to touch Rabindra Singh's work until the time he got his work published through an unorthodox publisher.

                                            14.

 

        Not being a writer, then, is no loss. Instead of projecting a versatile genius or conceptualizing on the experiences and the struggles of humankind or conjuring up visionary lives and worlds, the best thing to do is to stay on a spectator. From this vintage position alone, one can know what life is. Not simply knowing but living too. T.S.Eliot conveys, perhaps, the same thing in the lines,

               

             “Between the desires

               And the spasm

               Between the essence

               And the descent

               Falls the shadow

               For Thine is the Kingdom.”

 

        Ruma understood what Rajesh wanted to say, turned the direction, and asked another question related to her personal life.

        Ruma though aloud before Rajesh, if a boy has a physical relation with a girl, why does only a girl to blame as characterless? Why not a boy?

        Rajesh told her, but these are only lame excuses, would say of orthodox society because our society did not treat girls as human beings. Girls are still treated as “things” to be used and threw away. Until this concept did not change, you did not get the answer of your aforesaid question.

        "That means," Ruma said, "for all of you character lies below the belt."

                                              15.

 

        No, Rajesh said not for me.

 

                                  CHAPTER-7

 

        Ruma's parents tried hard to get her married secretly but not succeeded. However, Ruma did not want to get married, she wanted to be something in life but her parents like any other parents thought a daughter should be married as soon as possible.

        Ruma always opposed and told her parents that she could not marry a man who wanted dowry but as the wont of parents almost everywhere, they wanted to get rid of a burden i.e. daughter, sooner the better and the parents of Ruma were no exception.

        Rajesh too was unmarried and alone as his friends happened to get married, which normally was the beginning of the end of friendship. Rajesh felt often high and dry because he did not have the knack of winning the goodwill of the wives of his friends.

        Ruma found everything in Rajesh what she wanted in her would-be husband. Ruma decided tacitly that until she found a suitable match, she would not get married and she found Rajesh according to her choice but had not disclosed before Rajesh yet.

        Ruma's parents were much worried her  about her main reason for her parent’s wrath towards her.

        Ruma was in dilemma of “To say or not to say” to Rajesh.

                                             16.

 

        Indecision ran at large in her mind.

        Anyway, the time  came up and Rajesh reached her house.

        To be out of confusion in which she was in some time ago, Ruma asked Rajesh to make her mind fresh.

        In order to divert her mind, she asked a question, what prose is, and what poetry is. Sir.

        Rajesh said, (by avoiding the lengthy definitions and discussions), know them in brief, Prose is the right words in the right order and the poetry is the best words in the best order.

        By such short answers, both smiled to each other.

        Ruma's meaningful large eyes were telling something and her innocent face was telling something else.

        Understanding the situation, Rajesh knew, Ruma was getting emotional. Rajesh wanted to divert her, asked why did not you agree to marry a person of your parents’ choice?

        How could you know, sir I am against my parents’ choice.

        Your mother told me so, Rajesh said.

        Ruma became thoughtful and answered the question in a form of poetry, thus,

      “A different object does these

      Eyes require

      My lonely anguish melts

      No hearts but mine

      And in my heart

      The imperfect joys expire.”

 

                                             17.

 

        Rajesh was very much moved by listening to the poem and knowing fully well that poetry being the expression of the imagination mingled with hard facts of life. It is the very image of life expressed in its eternal truth.

        Rajesh was seriously thinking how he could be able to get Ruma out of her sorrow. The more he thought, the more he felt heartache.

        Rajesh solaced Ruma by reciting Byron's poem as

       

        “Had we never loved say kindly

           Had we never loved  to say blindly

           Never met or never parted

           We had never been broken-hearted.”

 

        The poem had such a solacing effect on Ruma and she was feeling better.

 

                                              18.

 

                                     CHAPTER-8

 

        Next day when Rajesh came to Ruma's house and both were sitting across the table, Ruma for the first time opened her heart through a chit of paper over which she had written thus,

                To,

                        My Everything

            “Today I want to say something

                Today A wish I make

                I will be there with you

                In each step you take

                I will be there with you

                In each and every breath you make.”

 

                                                         From,

 

                                                          Your Own

                                                               Ruma

 

        When Rajesh read it, he was so much moved that he never uttered a single word but pulled a sheet of paper from a copy and started writing thus,

                “ There is a tiny place deep in your heart where keep your most secret dreams and there are some people who keep their dreams locked up tight forever.” and gave it to Ruma, who after reading the piece of paper, answered by writing another couplet as,

 

                                           19.

 

        “But dreams are not meant to be locked up. They are meant to be brought out into the sunlight where they can take shape and fly” and gave it to Rajesh, who after going through the same, smiled.

        The smile of Rajesh inspired Ruma to write once again and as such, she wrote,

        “For whatever our problems, I am happier with you than without you,

                                            From You,

        “Forgive me for the crime of loving you. However, you know that I am not I but 'you'

                                                   To You

        “Tell me what I do

           If I see everywhere you

           Tell me what I do

           If I kiss even the place

           You keep your shoe

           Tell me what I do

           If I can do nothing without you

           By my condition, I can fell yours,

           Tell me what I can do

           If I feel the pains of you

           I can see truth in your eyes

           I know you say the best

           When you say nothing at all

           I know our love is a spiritual one

        But being an earthly creature, Show me

                Where is my Destiny?

 

                                           20.

 

        And the said piece of paper Ruma gave to Rajesh. Rajesh read it and understood that Ruma was in tremendous emotion.

        An hour elapsed, both Ruma and Rajesh did not talk a word, only wrote to each other.

        Rajesh could not resist the temptation of sitting an hour more because the question-answer session had been going on so smoothly that he was enjoying the moment very much.

        Again… Rajesh wrote, “What do you want from me, Ruma?

        Ruma answered as such,

 

        “Fatherly care

        Motherly warmth

        Brotherly possession

        This is what you mean to me

        I need not anything but exactly

        That what you have to offer me

        A bit of cloud and sky

        Moonlight and soothing breeze

        And a life of love and care. ”

 

    When Rajesh read it, he could not resist himself in embracing her and Ruma in his embrace found great solace and peace.

        And when both parted with each other, Ruma's large eyes were full of tears.

       

                                              21.

 

        Rajesh held a drop of tear on his ring finger and told her, “Don’t waste it, Ruma, it is very precious.”

        Ruma smiled with her dimple cheek.

        Rajesh captured that seen in his heart's camera for keeping it forever.

        Rajesh told her in this session for the first time that it is time to go Ruma.

        Ruma said adieu by saying that,

 

                       “I will steal you from yourself

                          And keep my property

                         I will make you my everything.”  

 

        Rajesh said, okay Ruma, meet you tomorrow, and went out.

        Ruma became sad.

 

 

                                         22.

 

                                 CHAPTER-9

 

        Rajesh was selected in Delhi University of Law and he was to go for Delhi for law education and degree.

        Next day Rajesh told Ruma about his success in passing out the prelim test for law education in Delhi. Ruma was happy but soon she became sad, as Rajesh was to go Delhi.

        Any way Rajesh though very reluctantly parted with Ruma, he did not want to go to Delhi but somehow got himself ready to go and at last went to Delhi.

        Before Rajesh left Ruma's house, she wrote a short letter as,

                “You are in my blood

                    You are in my heartbeat

                   You are in my life

                You become me and I become you

                  Then

                My absence will certainly hurt you.”

                                                              Your Own

                                                                    Ruma

        And on another letter which she wrote on the back of the letter as,

                           Love comes on this earth

                                  When you said me

                                        I love you

                               (Though very casually)

                                                                Your Own

                                                                    Ruma       

                                           23.

 

        In addition, handed over to Rajesh to keep it always in his purse.

        Rajesh kept it in his purse and with a heavy  heart went out of Ruma's house.

        Next day Rajesh left Ruma and went to Delhi.

        However, Rajesh was in Delhi physically but his heart was where Ruma was. In fact, Rajesh fell in love with Ruma.

        The condition of Ruma was same. She remained engrossed in the thought of Rajesh. She wrote a letter to Rajesh as,

        My Everything…

       

            You know that I can never imagine life without you. When you are not here, a thinking of losing you looms large in my heart. I do not want to lose you at any cost and I hope the same from you too. Do not forget your promise that you will remain with me always. Why did not you call me at least once since then? I am in a very bad condition. Remember what happened to me when you did not meet me for a week then how can you leave me for three long years. I am not denying that I cannot wait for you till three years, I mean to say only one thing that three years are like three eras for me, how will I pass them without you alone ?

        I am a stranger in my own house. Heavy restrictions are imposed upon me. I want to ask only one question to you, “Is living in Delhi without me is more important than my life? You can take me out of my house.

 

 

                                            24.

 

House to Delhi, where you live now. Why did not you think of me and my mess in which I am in without you? Do not leave me in the middle of the way please. I can wait for you until my last breath also but I am suffering a lot.

        I want you and love you, I need you to live. Please, do not be so indifferent to me. At least keep in touch, do at least one call in a week.

        You know I can think nobody else except you in my life. I will better die with your crimson on my forehead than to bring any other man at your place in my life.

        Please make quick decision, as my breath and my energy are completely lost. I can think of nothing without you. Please save me; take me out of a frustration in which I am. Save me, Rajesh. I will be happy with you in any way you keep me but no, never without you. I am not forcing you to decide or to give final decision, I just want you to take me soon from here or kill me with your hands. It is better to die by your hands than to spend such a long year without you.

        My father and my mother will do nothing, as there are three more children in the house.

        I am yours and I want to be yours forever. You always said me that, “Ask something.”

        I am asking you my life. Decide soon whatever you want. Remember one thing I want to live, not to die but I want to live only with you and for you. There is no happiness without you in my life. I will never deny being yours. Just plan it all and we will declare after we will be one.

                                          25.

        My life is in your hands. Save me or kill me. Reply me soon. Waiting for your reply, don't keep quiet.

        Look in my heart and then write.

        Remember words have meaning; each and every word of this letter is my final decision.

Help me

Your Own

Ruma

       

 

                                 CHAPTER-10

 

        Ruma posted the letter and when Rajesh received it, he read it several times, the more he read, the more he was moved emotionally.

        Rajesh wrote a letter in reply to Ruma that she should concentrate on her study to make her career bright.

        Ruma received the letter and ashamed of not concentrating on her study instead writing such a long emotional letter to disturb him in his study of law.

        A month spent studying seriously by Ruma but one cloudy evening she felt loneliness and started writing another letter to her beloved as,

           My Everything...

                 As you asked me to concentrate on study, I did it but it is rainy day and moving black clouds in the sky make me sad and so I am writing you this letter.

 

                                              26.

 

        Now the greatest fact which is related to me at present is that I am in love with you, the most refreshing thing is that whenever I tried to resist your love and also my love for you and whenever I tried to go away from you, the result was just the opposite what I wanted, you came all the more closer to me.

        I was wrong before, when I said to you once that I could never love any person after my bye-gone love, my own thinking proved wrong. I am in love with you.

 

                                                                 Your own

                                                                     Ruma

        The letter was posted to Rajesh and both write letters regularly. Time passes but gradually.

        And the three long years ended and Rajesh reached where the frustrated lot often reached. After all the legal profession is very often the last refuge of the frustrated.

        Ruma in a deep sadness concentrated more and more on her study of civil services examinations and at last, she got through the civil services examinations and became a tough bureaucrat living in her own Ivory Tower.

        In her loneliness Ruma often thought of Tagore's famous poem, which goes like this,

                “The lonely have no fear

                   Fear reigns only amidst the crowd

                   The lonely have no shame

                   Shame reigns only amidst the many

                   Lonely is the creator.”

 

                                          27.

 

                                 CHAPTER-11

 

        Ruma's parents were happy as their daughter carved her place in society. Ruma's parents knew that Rajesh and Ruma loved each other and there was nothing wrong in allowing them to get married but as both belonged to different castes, Ruma's parents did not want them to marry each other.

        One day Rajesh went to Ruma's house, Ruma was not in the house, Ruma's parents welcomed Rajesh and thanked him a lot for his good guidance to their daughter and also said that he would be invited in Ruma's marriage.

        Rajesh became completely silent partially due to shock and partially due to disgust and stopped responding Ruma's call.

        One day Ruma met Rajesh in her friend's house accidently and as soon as she saw Rajesh, she embraced him and started kissing him so passionately that he could not stop her. Really, “one can resist a blow of fist but it is very hard to resist a passionate kiss,” thought Rajesh. When she had loosen her embrace, she asked a volley of questions, like, why did not you meet me in between? Don't you know, I would die if you were not with me?

        Rajesh though moved but in order to escape from sentimental talk, he told Ruma, be practical Ruma. Life cannot be led only by wishful thinking. Your parents opposed even our nearness, how could they allow us to get married, since we belonged to different castes.

                                                                  

                                              28.

 

        Ruma replied that does not matter, we can be one by marrying each other.

        Why did not your parents understand this? Asked Rajesh.

        I know one thing, said Ruma, most important for me is that you make the difference between feeling that I am alone and knowing that I am loved. Seeing Rajesh unconvinced, she recited a poesy, thus,

 

        “I am yours and you are mine

           Why should we think about society's line?

           To do something, this is time

           God knows that we couple are very fine

           For that supreme power knows

           That we are in love and

           Love is not a crime. ”

 

        Rajesh was moved once again emotionally but being a person of practical disposition, Rajesh told Ruma, look Ruma, marriage is not be all and end all of life. That does not mean I won't marry you, I must marry you when time comes.

        As a matter of fact, you are still afraid of your past life, because of which you had been defamed and your parents hate you because of your past love affairs. They think, Rajesh continued, they cannot be able to get you married with a boy of your caste.

 

 

                                          29.

 

                Let bygone be bygone, you are not what you were yesterday. Now you are a bureaucrat, boys of your caste will be in queue in front of your house to hold your hand with nuptial knot.

        However, Rajesh made his thought clear by saying that I never look at you as people look at you, for me, character does not lie below the belt.

        As you said love is not a crime, steadfastly adhere to with your that thinking. First, ask your parents about their plan regarding your marriage. People cannot tolerate a girl has a right to choose her husband; it is only parents who decide, said Rajesh.

        Knowing her parents and their plan regarding her marriage, Ruma asked impatiently, that means, we cannot marry each other.

        Do not bother about marriage, Ruma, told Rajesh.

        We believe in spiritual love in which marriage is not necessary. We love each other and will love each other forever, said Rajesh.

        Ruma kept mum for a moment.

        Rajesh became sentimental and asked Ruma, well Ruma, tell me, did not once you write as,

 

        “I know our love is a spiritual one”

        But further I wrote, Ruma made Rajesh remember that

        “But as being an earthly creature

            Show me

          Where is my destiny? ”

 

                                           30.

 

        Rajesh remembered the same and told her, yes, I remember Ruma; your destiny is in service of your nation as bureaucrat. You will be a part of policy making for your nation.

        No, no Rajesh, this is not fair. Had I known after getting a job I would lose you, I did not have the job?  Said Ruma.

        Ruma became very sad and asked what should I do now?   

        Do, Rajesh reiterated, as I told you to do.

        That is right Rajesh, said Ruma, thinking something, I will do what you want me to do but keep in touch with me at least, requested Ruma.

        Rajesh told Ruma that is not possible because if we continue loving each other, your parents will take it otherwise and that I do not want to happen.

        Good-bye Ruma, said Rajesh, before departing from her finally and forever.

        Ruma became very sad and her lips shuddered, “Why did you meet me, Rajesh?”

 

 

                                          31.

 

                                 CHAPTER-12

 

        Rajesh and Ruma love each other even today though spiritually.

        Ruma joined and had been doing her job and Rajesh was also doing his job but both have the same feeling to remember

                                Come back

        Before the capture of darkness

        From anywhere you have been

        In this bad time I may put

        Moon beneath your head

        And wrapped the moonlight

        So that

        You may feel

         Fresh and live again

                               Come back

         When you will be completely tired

          Then moon beneath your head

          And with the moonlight

          I will wrap you entire

          So that

          I remain with you

          In your entire thing which is main.

 

 

               The End