Turn the Page, Turn the Life | A Writer’s Battle for Survival | Help Her Win
Turn the Page, Turn the Life | A Writer’s Battle for Survival | Help Her Win

Kartik Aggarwal



Kartik Aggarwal


The Dalliance

The Dalliance

9 mins

SHE: Is it just me or today, something was really gonna happen between us?

SHE: Be honest

HE: What do you think?

SHE: Cross question nahi 

SHE: Bata

HE: Frankly, I was lost in the moment

HE: But where did this come from?

SHE: Maybe I'm just over analyzing stuff

HE: Then perhaps some things are best left unsaid…

SHE: I will remember every single moment with you

SHE: Don't fucking leave me

HE: I won't

HE: And please answer the question that I asked you.

HE: Text when you reach home.


[His POV]

[14/02/19, 23:11]

Of course, I lied to her when I said that I won't write about today. How could I let it go? This was the best week I could have ever hoped for. This is perhaps God's blessing to me for the ordeals I had to undertake last year. 

I don't know why but history is trying to sneak into the welded door of my life. I keep on telling her to move on with her past, but in reality, I am one of those who hasn't moved on. There are some of us who never do.

But this time, I will give it a fresh take and not let the past claw its way out. 

The irony is, that the first time we met outside the office was on 31st December, the last day of 2018 a completely unexpected outing. After all, I was not the only one without a new year's evening plan. But it was one of the brightest spots in an overall dystopian year for me. After-all, as they say, all's well that ends well.

Even though I always don't lose hope till the end but yet I pretend that I don't hope only in lieu of hoping that my hope comes true. In this case, she only came to me for career advice seeing my vast number of failed experiences in different endeavors and wisdom acquired from them. By the way, I am trying to figure out my inner calling till now. She is planning to go abroad and that is not a bad choice of seeing the cut-throat competition here. Right now, I have no plans of settling abroad as I believe I have nothing lacking here. But something inside me is inclining me towards that direction. 

I won't deny the fact that I adore her company. There is something about her that can't be overlooked. Is it the exuberance of her youth (that reminds me of my college days) or the invigorated zeal to make it big, that makes me excited? Or her fitness regime that can certainly help me set new fitness goals. I don't know what it is but I am sure her optimism has once again forced me to dream big, to not give up on my dreams. She has reinstated my faith in love. She has made me realize that if the past was good, the present was better and who knows the future could be the best. 

But it seems strange, why suddenly? How come it happens out of the blue? We were sitting adjacent to each other in the same project for 5 months and we barely greeted each other. All I remember is the headache she used to cause when after a long day's work she used to gossip about all the shitty office stuff with her friends. Now, we fool our friends after work pretending to go home and sneak out for our little secret meetings, going out for dinners (not forgetting the brownies after meals), and then twinning when waiting on the metro platform.

I hope I could sneak into her mind and get a picture of what she's thinking right now. Until now what she has told me is that she finds my presence positive and it gives her good vibes. Really? That was just a made-up answer and I'll take that as a compliment. Moreover, that wouldn't have brought us so far. Let me see if I can learn more from our dalliance without modifying it my own way and getting attached to it. I hope she doesn't mind this name.

Well, I can feel the jitters of wanting to talk or chat with her. However, I should be thankful for whatever time I am getting and feel lucky to have got anything whatsoever. I can simply gaze at the screen and quietly smirk and then move on.

[15/02/19, 01:50]

Sometimes, for moments I get furious over her delayed responses. But then I have to remind myself there was someone who used to read my mind and text me even before I could give an answer. Perhaps as I mentioned, my past will always claw its way out… I will have to make peace with it and try to get above it… 

Perhaps I should stop seeking answers here and simply go with the flow this one time. The best things don't have a definition and I guess that is where the fun lies...


[Her POV]

[14/02/19, 23:00]

I don't know how I could get attracted to him after... But there is something more to him than what I see. For the first time, someone has overwhelmingly supported my dream to go to Australia. Right now I wish so hard that he too comes to Monash. I am sure life will be different. 

Does he want to or am I only over analyzing? But let me try.

[14/02/19, 23:15] SHE: So, we were in the same project, I knew of you but I didn't know about you, I remember being a judgy person... Haha used to think you're boring always busy with some work.... Didn't talk to anyone or maybe I didn't notice you that much. Cos duh? Who notices boring people? Well, back then you did seem like that na

But now, after becoming this close to you, I'm really starting to believe that great friendships happen unexpectedly. which I have always heard but never experienced. Even I was shocked at how I'm right most of the time about reading people's minds. but you're such a tricky human being, you threw me off. I come to you for life advice. You come to me for time-pass, well, I don't know what attracts you to me really? I can spend hours with you, even if we aren't talking, just being around that positivity is amazing. I don't think people need to talk to keep enjoying themselves. Sometimes, silence is beautiful too with you. 

I don't know when, and what happened that lured me in. If someone asked me when did i realize I liked you... I can just think about the day when we had "first" met (considering it was just a 15 min meeting in the metro) when you were supposed to leave the next day to Kolkata for a couple of weeks. and something just hit me... Maybe it was after the conversation we had about Goa or something else. I don't know what it was but we just clicked, or at least I think we did.. the bond has just been growing ever since. and I want it to grow more and more every day... EVEN IF YOU'RE LEAVING the Organisation. I will write more about the meetings we had other than just "after office" hours. aaj ke liye itna.... bahot likh diya didn't realize…

Should I send it to him? I don't know why I think so much? Someday my head will blast even before I could go there. Maybe it is the Cancerian trait that both of us are cursed with. If I send him, this may change the future of our relationship. I don't want it to change even if it just a dalliance or this is what he calls it... I have lost too many things in the past. I don't wanna lose him. I really don't know whether I'll make it big or not?

There are times when I don't know myself. I'm confused. I am someone who gets bored of things very easily. I like a lot of things but then leave them halfway because someway down the line it gets monotonous. I don't want to do that with him. I can see a pain in his eyes that has made him much mature than his age. However, he won't ever share it. 

This world may be filled with selfish but who says selfless are dead they're not. They are right here proving every part of you wrong that no one will ever. get you, no one will ever love you. But it's a world where there is God... He will show up right in time catching you by surprise leaving you frazzled and every time, it's magic...

[15/02/19, 02:15]

But I think I have confused myself even further. It is 2 am and here I am still not sure whether I should text him or not. I am sure he must be waiting. Oh shit, he's online... 

To be continued...

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