THE HEART SEEKS WARMTH

  CHAPTER 1

My father's job often required us to relocate from one place to another. Which meant , a new set of neighbours , a new school , a new set of friends and gazillions of other hassles of relocation. I was 18 ,when my family relocated to Spring Hill, a quiet and yet a quaint little hill town . As a quintessential teenager, peeping on the verge of adulthood , I took an instant liking to the town , even though the process of relocating was pretty annoying and exhausting.

A couple weeks after we settled down , my mother carefully arranged some assortments in a box ,'lovingly' hurled at me a plethora of scoldings for being a lazy potato ,and shoo-ed me out of the house to go and invite the next door neighbour for dinner . Our next door neighbour , the Mins , had been a resident of the town for nearly a decade . Mrs . Min was a middle aged widow who lived with her son in the beautiful two storey house , next to us . A little chit chat with my mother in the days post our relocation to this town , had resulted in my mother taking an instant liking to her and her tiny little vegetable garden in the front lawn of her house. She had become one true companion to my mother in this new neighbourhood. Mrs . Min was a beautiful woman , albeit the impressions of age had just started to set in. " Sure dear, it's really kind of your mother to invite us for dinner. Thank you so much....Look at you; such a beautiful young lady.....!!!", she smiled happily as she accepted the gift from me and lovingly patted on my head. As I returned home a feeling of warmth engulfed me from head to toe.

The Mins came over for dinner. Mrs. min and her son Yoongi. Yoongi was an exceptionally quiet boy. I got to know from Mrs.Min that he was a senior at Spring Hill High School, all of 19 years of age. Yoongi was a spitting image of his mother. Large, veiny hands, beautiful and soft feline features and squishy cheeks , Yoongi exuded a cold aura ; almost intimidating. He didn't speak much apart from curtly answering a few questions that my parents asked. He didn't even spare me a glance, leave alone a smile. He seemed very quiet. At the end of the dinner Mrs. Min pulled me aside and asked me a strange question. Strange in the sense that it sounded more like a pleading request and less like a question. " If you don't mind , Philomel , can I ask something of you? ......... nothing extravagant..... just that .... Could you be Yoongi's friend?..... My son .....He has no friends Philomel...... I don't remember the last time I saw him smile..... He is really ...really alone" . I stared at her dumbfounded .... I always believed that friendship was something that one formed naturally. But here , this woman was asking , ...no..... Literally pleading me to be friends with his son. the same Yoongi who looked so cold and distant that it could freeze me up in an instant. I hesitantly said , " Mrs.Min , I....I don't know if ..." . Mrs. Min grasped my hands and pleadingly requested " Philomel, I believe only you can do it . If someone can make my son smile again , it's you Philomel.... it's you ....". My heart wrenched up in pain . " Mrs. Min , I don't know anything about Yoongi... I can't give you word ... But I promise that I will try my best" . That night as I pondered over and over Mrs. Min's question , I made a decision as I stared from my window at the faint yellow lamp light that came over from Yoongi's room....With the fluttering of the curtains of his room in the light breeze of the night, I decided that I would make Yoongi smile again , no matter what.

Yoongi was a peculiar creature... or so I thought. In the blazing summers , I believed no omnipotent power could change his mind into wearing half sleeved shirts. Yoongi always wore black long sleeved tees , occasionally pairing them with black jackets. I wondered if he knew what summers felt like.

A week after Mrs. Min's request , I decided that I would accompany Yoongi to school. Since I also took admission in the same school that Yoongi was a senior in, I realized that going to school together won't be a bad idea. So I decided that I would wait for him outside his house , catch up with him once he comes out and we could go to school together , rather than dumbly walking all by myself. As the steel gate of his house creaked open , Yoongi came out in a black overall and his eyes widened on seeing me waiting for him.... He seemed almost startled . " Good morning gummy bear... I thought it'd be good if we could go to school together.....so I..... ", I couldn't even finish the sentence that I had begun .. Yoongi had already started walking without even sparing me a glance , leave aside a morning wish or a simple hi . I was disappointed per say.. However , brazen as I was, I shamelessly started walking beside him and started asking him random questions... about his childhood, his favourite food , his hobbies, his school life , his dreams.... Yoongi didn't answer a single question... not even a word ....he just waked ahead as if I was invisible or as if I didn't exist... But never once did he snap at me to stop chewing on the last of his brain cells or push me away... he ignored me yes... but continued to walk with me until we reached school and parted for our respective classes. I waved him goodbye and and shamelessly told him that I would wait for him by the school gate and we could return home together once school got over. However to my utter disappointment , I waited and waited for Yoongi after school... But Yoongi never showed up... Ultimately I got tired of waiting and finally headed home, all alone. I was really disappointed but my lips curled up at the thought of meeting gummy bear the next morning for school .

This went on for another two and half weeks.. I would wait for Yoongi at the front gate of his house, we would go to school together , I would chew his brain cells out by talking about random things and he would continue to treat me like a phantom. I would tell him that I would wait for him once school got over , and yet I would walk back home all alone... To be honest everything had fallen in a routine..almost like a cycle... My friendship with Yoongi seemed almost one sided... I was the initiator and the responder as well..Yoongi almost seemed absent... as if he didn't exist at all. But when did I say that I would give up?

Four weeks into this dumb cycle of a routine where Yoongi continued to treat me as a nonexistent entity ( I strongly believe his head was about to explode with my incessant chattering and he had a strong urge to stitch my mouth up and dump me in the local lake) , mother nature said enough was enough and , being tired of the pathetic drama herself , took matters in her own hands. The heavy downpour started right before the final class got over and I realized no amount of mathematical equations could save me from the rain , if I didn't have an umbrella. I waited for about an hour in the school premises , hoping for the rain to stop . but fate never worked out in my favour. It was getting late and I had tonnes of assignments to complete , so covering my head with my school bag and holding my big fat mathematics book under my arm , I briskly started walking home. However by the time I reached the school gate , completely drenched like a cat and fearing that a bout of pneumonia will bring forth my untimely death , I suddenly felt that I was no longer feeling the rain on my skin. As I looked up to get a better knack of the unexpected situation , I saw Yoongi , to my utter surprise , holding an umbrella over my head and blinking at me as if he had seen an alien. Muttering an almost inaudible " Let's go home quickly" , Yoongi wordlessly took the heavy book from under my arms and guided me home under his umbrella . Although completely drenched , I felt the familiar spread of warmth spreading from head to toes. As I collected my book back from him , once I reached home, and muttered a small thanks to him for accompanying me back home , I saw his cheeks flush ; a beet red colour, as he hurriedly proceeded home without so much as a reply.. Unconsciously my lips curled upwards.

Next morning my brows almost reached my hairline. Yoongi was already standing by his front gate , apparently waiting for someone. The moment his eyes met mine , he coyly hung his head low and started walking ahead . I briskly walked to catch up with him and as I was about blast Yoongi's eardrums with my incessant chattering , Yoongi suddenly passed me one of his ear pods without a word. I dumbfoundedly took the ear pods from him and felt the music soothe my ears. It was a fusion of R&B and jazz and for the first time in about the four weeks since I had got to know Yoongi, he had briefly opened up about a part of his life on his own accord, by sharing the music of his choice with me. he never asked me whether I liked the song or not but I was happy that the otherwise quiet boy had considered me important enough to share his choice of music.

On reaching school , as we were about to part, Yoongi suddenly called out to me , a quiet " Philomel ! " .....He handed me over a piece of paper as I dumbly stared at him.... he muttered " It fell from your book yesterday . I am sorry I read it without your permission , but it's good.... really good " . Crisp and short . I hurriedly opened the piece of paper to see that it was a poem that I had written a couple months back. A poem that I had written to simply pass time.....It was nothing but a piece of trash to me , but Yoongi read it...he read it carefully and complimented me on it... I was truly embarrassed ... " Yoongi it's...this poem is bullshit.. I just wrote it to kill time.....why would you even return it to me ? you could have simply thrown it away...It was all wet and dirty" .... He stared at me with those beautiful warm brown eyes as if he was trying to judge the capacity of my peanut sized brain. “If you’d like, you can share more of your work with me.” I couldn't see his face, but I could see the top of his ears turn red. Then he simply walked away to his class without a word.

Nearly 2 months after meeting Yoongi, one day I found myself having lunch all alone . My classmate Noel , with whom I had formed a close friendship and with whom I usually shared my lunch , took a sick leave . So I found a comfortable spot all for myself at the back lawn of the school , near the outer brick wall boundary. Three bites into my delicious chicken sandwich , when I heard a trash can hitting the ground with a loud thud coupled with boisterous hooting. Curiosity got the better of me leading me to take a peek at what was happening outside the boundary wall. My eyeballs nearly popped out when I saw Yoongi cornered by a bunch of his own classmates, apparently being bullied. A tall boy , seemingly the leader of the group , crouched down in front of Yoongi and I clearly heard him say... " Yah! you piece of filthy trash ! You really have some guts huh ?..... Snitching us out to the teacher ? " Yoongi quietly muttered something like " I didn't ... Leave me alone!!!" , but it almost came like whine. Before Yoongi could defend himself further , a punch landed on his cheeks leaving him with a busted lip. Another boy pushed him roughly against the trash can . " Such a weirdo!!... what's with you ??? " ...He picked at Yoongi's clothes and poured a bottle of water on him. " It's hot buddy... I just helped you to cool down ...." ,he snickered as the others joined him .“Awww, what happened to the guy from earlier? Bitch, you were ignoring me like you’re looking down on me. Now, look at you, a real wimp.” One of the guys said with a roaring voice.

Rage flashed before my eyes . Confrontation is what I hated the most, especially with people who look intimidating . But I felt this overwhelming sense of guilt as I now knew the victim’s identity. When I looked closely at Yoongi, I could see that he had a petrified look on his face, and his entire body was shaking. The guys around him laughed at him as he tried to get up to only be pushed down by the foot of one of his bullies. Their laughs crescendo each time his body flopped back to the ground. But what made this more painful was seeing how Yoongi wasn't fighting back. When he saw one of the guys raising their foot up to kick him down, it became reflex for him to embrace the kick. He didn’t even look angry, but instead, he looked like he’s on the verge of tears, pleading for this to be over. As a way to tease Yoongi, one of the guys kicked the metal dumpster, making Yoongi cover his ears instinctively. I could see the dirt and tears on the ends of his sleeves as he protected his ears. They laughed at Yoongi’s childish behaviour. It’s not normal to see a high school student curl up into a ball due to loud noises, and this caught my attention. I couldn’t stand watching anymore. It hurt to see Yoongi giving up before he even tried . I ran towards them, getting on my knees and putting my arms around Yoongi as the four other guys stared at me, puzzled.“Stop it! Don’t hurt him anymore!” I cried out.

My demands didn’t scare the four guys at all. They only imitated my high-pitched voice, saying ‘don’t hurt him,’ mockingly. “And who are you? A social justice warrior? What are you gonna do, complain about us on Twitter?” .My interference wasn't creating a dent at all. If anything, I might just be adding to the problem. I tried to think of other ways to make them leave, but I was drawing to a blank since I didn’t really plan this well before jumping in.“If…if you guys don’t leave, I’m going to scream for a teacher to come!”.... Unfortunately, it did nothing to make them think differently, other than that I was pretty laughable right now. “Do you even know what kind of person you’re protecting?” , One of them picked me up by my arm with no problem, and I met eye-to-eye with him. He had that smile on his face as if I was nothing more than a simple fly that he’d feel satisfied swatting.“This bitch down there,” He began as he kicked Yoongi one more time, “only cares about himself. He thinks that he’s so high and mighty that everyone else in this school is too cheap for him. He’s always giving that goddamn glare to everyone, and you know what? We all tried to be nice to him. We really did, but his attitude is so ugly that we thought we’d teach him a lesson.”The guy threw me away from him, making me lose balance and land on my back. Because I couldn’t keep balance, my left elbow hit a rock with a rough impact. The pain hit me immediately, and it stung my entire elbow, hitting it directly onto my funny bone. I couldn't feel anything below my elbow, as if I no longer had control over them.“Let’s go guys. Lunch is almost over anyway.”

I immediately crouched down in front of Yoongi. "Yoongi ,are you alright??...". However he blatantly pushed me away and yelled at me ,”What the hell are you doing here??? I didn’t ask for your help….. No Philomel, I don’t need your freaking compassion…!!!. Didn’t you hear those guys???? Just please stay away from me for God’s sake..!!!! Please !!!!". Tears stung at my eyes." But I was just trying to help Yoongi…….". Yoongi roughly pushed me away and before I could catch up to him , the bell rang signalling the end of the lunch time. Tears welled up in my eyes but the excruciating pain in my arm made me cringe.

Following this incident, I didn’t speak to Yoongi for nearly four days. The injury to my arm hadn’t subsided at all leaving splotches of purple behind. It was excruciatingly painful to the point that I couldn’t even lift my arm. However I kept quiet and continued with school. A couple days later as I was heading to the cafeteria with a heavy maths book In my arm, I accidentally bumped into Yoongi. The math book fell from my arm to the ground and as I got down to pick it up , I found Yoongi mimicking my action. He lifted my book up and muttered "Follow me...". I kept on staring at him. He had wanted me to stay away from him and I had followed his rule perfectly . "Yoongi… What are you…..??".  "Helping!" . "But why???". I was pretty confused to be honest. Holding my good arm , Yoongi muttered ,"Come with me to the medic room.". I was a bit taken aback but I quietly followed him nonetheless.

In the medic room Yoongi help me sit on the bed and help me take off my school bag. He looked at me apologetically for a couple seconds and then proceeded to take out an ointment from the adjacent drawer…. "Lift your arm." ,he instructed. He gently applied the medicine to the wound and sighed, "Are you a baby? Can you not even take care of your wound yourself???" , he scolded me. However , seeing me staring at him , his eyes softened , "It hurts... doesn’t it???". He continued rambling as if he was hesitating to say something. "What is it Yoongi?", I asked him directly," Is...is there something that you want to tell me?". Once he finished wrapping the bandage around my arms ,he took out painkillers from an adjacent drawer and opened my bottle of water , " Eat this... it’ll make the swelling smaller and hurt less...". And then he quietly muttered "I’m sorry ..... Philomel...".

My ears perked up at his apology. "What for???", I asked him . " For saying all those things to you and for being a coward for not standing up for you when those guys hurt you.". This was unbelievable. This gummy bear of a boy was apologising to me for something that he didn't even do . I couldn't believe it. He’s apologizing to me, and on top of that, he’d even bandaged up my arm. He must had felt very guilty about what he’d said to me. I was so confused. This wasn’t the Yoongi that everyone claimed him to be. Where was the Yoongi that everyone said was as cold as ice; the one who was said to only care about himself and dislike the company of others? The Yoongi I’d seen most of the time was someone who was very thoughtful and attentive. Though a bit on the quiet side, he found his own ways of being amiable.

Yoongi finished organizing the cabinet, so he walked out of the door. But before he left , he stopped right at the exit. “I’m not doing this for your forgiveness, so if you try to talk to me again, I’m going to ignore you.”

He walked out completely, and I was left wondering. I was now starting to understand why his mother wanted me to be his friend. I was the only one who he could reach out to be with, not only at school but at home as well. He was so easily misunderstood that his mother feared that no one would give him the chance to open up. I remembered his mother saying that he’d not smiled in a long time. What is it that hurt him so bad that he voluntarily chose to block people out? I might never find the answer to the question…but if there’s anything I could do, I’d like to help him out of it.

It’s the next morning, and I returned back to the usual routine of waiting for Yoongi to walk together. I swung my leg back and forth, excitedly waiting for Yoongi to come out of the door. I was wearing a short-sleeved shirt, showing off the bandages that Yoongi did. A couple of minutes went by, and Yoongi exited his front door. Ecstatic, I jumped in front of him with a wide smile.“Good morning gummy bear !!!!”.He certainly wasn’t expecting my presence, so your sudden greeting made him jump. He was in his usual attire of earphones and long sleeves.“What are you doing??? ...and stop calling me gummy bear!!!”....“Walking to school with you.... And no !!! you look like a squishy gummy bear ... So no!!! Not happening!!!!”....Yoongi creased his eyebrows. He honestly might have expected me to continue evading him, not this. So ,Yoongi didn't give me an answer, which I expected, and he continued his path to school with me following him like a lost puppy.

I made idle conversation with him, and he did his usual habit of acting like he was ignoring me. “Has anyone ever asked how your day has been?”, I asked suddenly while he was too busy walking. No reply, though I could kind of predict what the answer to that was already.“So how was your day?” .Yoongi jolted a little bit, not expecting that kind of question, but he tried to remain cool. “My day hasn’t started, so how can I answer that?”. He was right. It was a stupid question for me to ask, but I knew what I was doing.“I just thought that you’d like to hear that!” I gave him a toothy, chirpy smile.

Yoongi couldn't fathom why Philomel would still stick to him like a leech despite hearing all those nasty comments about him from his classmates on the day of the bullying incident. He couldn't understand at all why she continued to try to befriend him when his entire class , albeit the whole school had shunned him. And yet , when Philomel smiled , he couldn't evade the lingering warmth in the pit of his stomach. Philomel was blinding , shining and warm like the sun , whereas he was cold and distant like ice. Like two opposite poles ... And opposite poles always attracted each other, didn't they??? Yoongi had grown so accustomed to her apparently 'unwanted' presence that he didn't want Philomel to leave ... Not just yet . He secretly wanted to bask in her warm presence every morning when they walked together to school , listen to her incessant chattering and see her sunshine of a smile every day. She seemed like a gust of cool breeze in his emotionally tiring days. He would never admit but going together to and returning home from school with her actually provided him respite from the hostile school atmosphere and made his day better. But Yoongi was a human too. he feared that one day even Philomel would become tired of his short comings and might shun him just like the others.

 

CHAPTER 2

Several months passed by in the blink of an eye. My friendship with Yoongi blossomed into a beautiful relationship. Yoongi naturally spoke less but opened up a lot more on his life… As we both continued to go to and return from school together, I got to know so much more about him… Little things, nothing things, that didn’t matter in the bigger picture of life ; but to me they opened a window to knowing Yoongi better. He told me how as a child he hated broccoli, was afraid that a monster might pull his leg from underneath his bed, simply adored Kumamon and that he loved stargazing. Yoongi and I were now much more comfortable in each other’s presence… as opposed to earlier times, conversation flowed naturally between us and I realized he actually enjoyed my presence. Sometimes we both went out for brief walks at night , our hands brushing against one another and sometimes relentless teasing from my side. I often spent my afternoons at his place, in his room, sprawled out on his bed like I owned it; talking about random things or sometimes discussing important assignments for school. He would often grunt and whine complaining about me taking up his entire bed but I knew, he secretly liked it…

However, the most interesting thing that I discovered about him was his proficiency in playing the piano. It was so effortless. He truly worked wonders with the piano. When he sat and played the piano, I felt as if time took a standstill or the world revolved round the magical music that he created out of the piano with his long veiny hands. The first time I discovered Yoongi's passion towards music was when I went to his place for the first time. His mom was not at home and as I ascended up the stairs to go to his room, I heard a beautiful melody being played on the piano. Curious, I quietly opened the door to his room and stood still listening to the music that he played with eloquence on the piano. Goosebumps spread over my skin. He was playing a song that I had never heard but Yoongi was so immersed in playing the piano that he didn’t notice me and yet I couldn’t even blink my eyes. It felt ethereal so as to say. When he finally stopped playing, I felt like someone had stuck my feet to the ground with super glue. I couldn’t move. I was so overwhelmed that literally barged myself at Yoongi and engulfed him in a bear hug. He was so surprised at my action that he froze and went completely speechless.

Since that day onwards, watching and listening to Yoongi play the piano became my favourite thing to do. I learnt that he had learnt the piano all by himself. He once confessed that the Piano was his soul, his first love. He expressed all his emotions, his pent up worries and frustrations, his feelings, by playing the piano. I believed that the piano was the perfect reflection of Yoongi’s persona… If one listened carefully, then one could probably understand what he was going through by listening to the music he played on the piano ; whether he was happy or sad or anxious or scared. I loved listening to Yoongi play. To be honest it soothed me. On some days he would just play and I would just lie down on his bed and listen.. No words, just pure music. Whenever he composed something new, he would make sure that I would be the first person to listen to it. It’d seriously make me melt. He probably knew that I would never judge him and would give him honest reviews. Thus, unbeknownst to one another, Yoongi and I eventually bonded deeper over music and the piano playing sessions.

December set in and The quaint town of Spring Hill decked up beautifully with the Annual Christmas Gala festivities… fairy lights adorned the streets as well as the trees, shops and restaurants were decorated beautifully with Christmas decorations , the large Spring field was transformed into a makeshift mini amusement park with several amazing game zones, candy and gift shops, and a large family carousel. Christmas was in another 2 days but the festivities had begun in full boom. It was the last of school before the Christmas vacation. Noel, my classmate asked me, “ Hey Mel!!! … wanna join us today for the Gala??? … we’re going tonight… Jimin, Lisa, Pia , Nick and me… . Wanna come along???? “. Meanwhile, Lisa also came along with Jimin, her boyfriend , and slung an arm around my neck , “ Yeah!! It’s gonna be loads fun… . Let’s all go together !!!“.I loved my friends… l really did, The were kind, funny and amazing but I realized that there was no place for Yoongi in the group. I had to come up with an excuse and I had to come up with other quickly… . “Ummmm… . I would have loved to join you all but the thing is I am leaving for my Grandparents’ tonight… . We’ll be celebrating Christmas together… . Sorry guys!! I guess I’ll be giving it a miss… “., I sadly replied… “ Awww… too bad Bub… it would have been your first time at the gala… . But no worries, next year for sure… . Enjoy Philomel!!!! Merry Christmas!!! “ , saying so Noel gave me a hug and we all passed Christmas greetings and went our respective ways…

I literally hopped my way to Yoongi's place and plopped down on his bed… . “School’s over? “ , Yoongi asked. “ Hmmm… . “, I hummed, as I continued,“ Yoongsta, why did you bunk school today? “… He gave me a look and said “ I had this biology assignment to complete.. I was lagging behind.. So just took a day off and finally got rid of it!! “ . I stared at him for some time.. “ What????“ Yoongi asked me, a bit flustered. I shamelessly asked him, “ Yoongsta, wanna come along with me to the Gala?? I was thinking of going and thought it’d be better if we just went together…. So what say? .. Wanna come along? “

To say Yoongi was flustered, was not satisfactory,. He blushed a beet red, clearly embarrassed and asked me quietly “ Why Mel?? I – I mean, are - are you sure you want me to go with you??? I – I mean… why do you want me to go with – with you??? What about Noel and the others??? “ I blatantly replied, “ Dunno about them… but wanna go with you… And you are coming with me… “ I stressed on the last sentence. “Listen Yoongi, when was the last time you actually went to the gala huh? I bet you don’t even remember… So c'mon… we both are gonna have a lot of fun.. Let’s go tomorrow… You and I… “. I whined. I purposely hid the fact from Yoongi that I had ditched my friends to go with him. I just wanted to make him feel good, make him feel important and so, I chose to go with him and him alone. Yoongi sat on his chair and settled his gaze on the ground.. .. I sensed his hesitancy… I understood that Yoongi felt vulnerable in the presence of a large number of people. He had never had real friends per say and I was probably the only person closest to being friends with him ( if he considered me a friend at all). And as a friend I decided it was high time to bring him out of his shell and I secretly hoped that the Gala would provide me with an opportunity to fulfil my mission.

Next day, on the 24 th of December, Yoongi and I set out in the evening to celebrate Christmas. The Gala was almost filled to the brim with the residents of Spring Hill… Gift and candy shops were full with kids , while restaurants mostly were occupied by families for dinner or couples on a Christmas dinner date. Yoongi and I walked alongside one another.. The fairy lights adorning the streets created a dreamy atmosphere. For a change, Yoongi had worn a Lavender jumper paired with dark washed jeans , a dark blue and white over coat and all bundled up in a white muffler. But , I could sense his nervousness of being in the midst of a plethora of people. So, I entwined my fingers with his tightly , much to his surprise and inserted both our entwined hands in my over coat pocket. I looked up at him and gave him a warm smile and noticed his ears turning red.

I literally dragged Yoongi to the game zone. We casually fooled around at different game zone shops, laughing, giggling like little kids and teasing each other upon losing at a particular game ,but the SHOOT THE BALLOONS game shop was lots of fun .. Streams of balloons passed back and forth rapidly on a conveyor belt like machine mounted on a wall. If I could shoot 10 balloons within 25 seconds, I would get a gift. I took up the challenge as yoongi watched discreetly. However, I could only shoot 9 balloons and missed the last balloon shot. I was disappointed, to be honest.. My eyes drooped down and I gave a pout that made Yoongi chuckle. But the shopkeeper was kind enough to notice my despair and gave me a small stuffed flamingo as a gift. It was a lovely present and it immediately made my face light up with a smile. I accepted the gift with gazillion of thanks to the generous shopkeeper and then I turned to Yoongi…” Here, for you!!! “ , I smiled and handed him over the cute flamingo. “M-Me???? …Mel.. I… “, Yoongi's eyebrows nearly reached his hairline. Wordlessly, I thrust the flamingo into his hands and smiled up at him and dragged him to a gift shop..

At the gift shop, Yoongi straightened up with a water bottle in his hands. Uncapping and handing me the bottle, he gestured for me to take a sip. Accepting the water in pure confusion, I opened my mouth to drink only to have him tilt the bottle of water towards my lips. I suddenly became aware of how thirsty I actually was and I felt my heart soften at his actions. “ I need to buy something for my parents for Christmas… and I need your help to choose the gifts “, I blatantly said to repress the growing fluster in my cheeks.

 Yoongi and I spent about an hour and half deciding on and discussing about various gifts that could be gifted to my parents.. We both finally zeroed upon a beautiful floral patterned watch for my mother and a grooming set for my father. While Yoongi was contemplating and trying to select a possible Christmas gift for his mother, I went to the jewellery section to look around. The lady at the store warmly greeted me and asked me what exactly I was looking for. I was hesitant at first because I had never bought jewellery before for anyone. But then an idea flashed before my mind. “ummm… I would like to take a look at these silver bracelets please!!! “ . “ sure ma’am!... Is it a gift for someone special? “ she asked. I hesitated. I wanted to buy one for Yoongi but on what grounds? I deeply cared for him as a friend but deeper within I knew that I definitely had feelings for Yoongi, which were not merely restricted to friendship. I had started developing feelings for him. “uh… yeah… it – it is for a special someone.” . The lady at the counter warmly smiled at me a showed me a wide variety of bracelets. But amongst all of them , one bracelet caught my eye. A simple silver chain bracelet with tiny hanging stars , half moons and musical notes at every alternate loop and a tiny silver heart at the centre, encrusted in another small glass star. It was beautiful and it immediately reminded me of Yoongi. “I would like to have this one please.” . “ that’s a lovely choice ,ma’am! … I am sure, the person receiving this gift will definitely love it!!! ”. She had it wrapped up beautifully and I put the gift in my bag with butterflies in my stomach , thinking about Yoongi's possible reaction on receiving this gift. Yoongi finally chose a beautiful body essential set for his mother upon my insistence. I insisted that she would love it and Yoongi went ahead to pick out a cherry blossom fragranced bath and body essential set to gift his mom for Christmas.

Coming out of the gift shop, we realized we were hungry. We decided on going to a nearby Italian restaurant for dinner but it turned out fate had other plans for us… As we both headed for the restaurant, I caught a glimpse of my group of friends casually strolling around at the Gala. My eyes widened. They were coming in our direction but I had to make sure that they didn’t notice us. I tightly caught hold of Yoongi’s hand and dragged annd pulled him into nearby photo booth to hide from my friends… I felt a little guilty for ditching them, true. But they couldn’t see me with Yoongi just yet.

--“What? What?? What??? What’s wrong? What happened?”, Yoongi asked startled and confused .

---” Nothing!!!!… it’s Noel and the others and I don’t want them to know that we are here!!!”.

--- “why???....What’s wrong in them knowing that we are here??? And besides, they are your friends!!!!”, Yoongi hesitated but countered, with eyes wide open.

---” that’s cause I ditched them, you single brain celled creature!!!... Look I didn’t want to ditch them, but I knew that if I went with them, they would never include you in the group. You know it Yoongi that they don’t treat you well… And besides I wanted to enjoy the Gala with you… so I kinda lied to them that I was going to visit my Granny’s for Christmas… I didn’t think we would almost meet in here!!!!”, I hissed but I realized that I was rambling at this point.

--- Yoongi stared at me wide eyed for some time as if trying to process what I just said…and then he softly muttered,“ Did.. Did you really want to spend time with me so much, Mel?”, he hesitantly asked me..

I realized he was a bit disappointed in me for ditching my friends for him. He must’ve thought that he was being an obstruction in me going out with my friends. But still, in that hesitant question, I could feel his vulnerability, albeit, a little ray of hope even. So I smiled warmly at him and cupped his cheeks in my palm and said, “Yeah, why not??? … School just got so busy, I could barely spend time with you Yoongsta!!! Besides, I spend ample time with them at school…”I shrugged. But what I didn’t expect was his reaction. He slowly gave out his splendid gummy smile in all its glory. Relief surged through me in an instant. “Wanna click some goofy pictures? “l gave him my signature toothy smile.

We both proceeded to take several goofy photographs. I wore a fake moustache with huge funky goggles and wrapped a feather scarf around my neck and held a poster that had written ‘MOST WANTED’ in it in a quirky handwriting. I made Yoongi wear a tattered red coat with a sparkly blue hat which had a huge green feather on it, coupled with shiny golden slacks. I playfully stuck a sticker showing ‘FLUENT IN CLOWNWERY' on his forehead. We took several amazing photographs, all huge smiles, giggles and laughter. Yoongi was so amused that he laughed his lungs out. We tried quirky poses and fooled around for some time. Eventually, we changed back into our clothing, paid the shopkeeper, collected the photographs and came out, discreetly taking a look as to whether my friends were around. After realizing that the coast was clear, Yoongi and I finally gave in to our grumbling stomachs. “Wanna have some corn dogs??? I know a good palce nearby that makes them…” Yoongi suggested.” “sure..!!! Anything would do..I can eat a horse now!!!!I quipped, laughing .At the end of the day, as we headed for some corn dog, hand in hand, I briefly looked at Yoongi and unconsciously my lips curled upwards. He was happy.

Buying piping hot corndogs and a warm cup of coffee for each of us, I asked Yoongi , “If you aren’t in a hurry to go home, wanna come along with me somewhere?”. “ where to?”, Yoongi asked, a bit confused. “C’mon!”, I replied.

Yoongi and I walked up to the Hill View Point, making casual conversation all the way. The Hill View Point was an elevated sight seeing point that provided a picturesque view of the entire town . It was also popular for observing sunrise and sunset by tourists. We both settled down on the soft grass and both our jaws nearly dropped to the ground at the picturesque view of the town below. It was as if someone had simply drowned the town in a sea of fairy lights. It looked mesmerizingly beautiful. Yoongi took a sip of his coffee and quietly muttered, clearly awestruck, “ It’s beautiful Mel!”… .

“ Hmmm… I figured you’d never been here… Same for me. So I thought it’d be best if we could visit this place at least once.”, I smiled up at him. My hands instinctively reached down to my bag and searched for the gift that I wanted to give him. As Yoongi was completely immersed in staring at the beautiful scenery below with longing eyes, I carefully took the gift out of my bag. “Ummm… . Here. …I got this for you.,.. For Christmas… Merry Christmas Yoongi !!!”, I awkwardly smiled at him and handed him over the gift. Yoongi jerked his head towards me on hearing me speak. He stared at the gift in his hands with wide eyes and then slowly looked at me. To say he was overwhelmed would be an understatement. I could clearly see tears brimming in his eyes but he fought hard.. So hard to stop them from flowing. The first tear however flowed from his eyes. I gently cupped his cheeks and wiped the tears away with my thumb… “ Open it..”, I gently said with a smile. He carefully unwrapped the gift . He took out the bracelet and stared at it with full blown eyes, tears flowing from his eyes rapidly. He continued staring at the present and then clutched it to his chest and slowly turned to look at me. He stared at me with eyes, all puffy and red, and a red nose and he looked so incredibly cute that I immediately squished his cheeks. “So… Gummy bear… What do you think???? Did you like it???… I didn’t just know…”, I couldn’t even complete the sentence when I felt Yoongi wrapping me tightly in his arms. The kind of hug that makes you warm. He desperately clung to me like he didn’t ever want to let me go. He sobbed quietly and I gently patted his back to comfort him. Truth be told, I didn’t want to back away from his embrace. The moment was so soothing, so intimate that I believe we both got lost into it momentarily. After what felt like hours of silence, Yoongi finally spoke. His sobbing had subsided but he sniffed and said, “ Thank you so much Mel!!!... You don’t know how much this gift means to me…”, and before he could finish, Yoongi broke into another round of sobs.

Several moments later Yoongi finally broke the hug and broke the silence too. He carefully kept the gift in his over coat pocket and folded and tucked his knees under his chin and softly said, “…Sorry, am I making you tired of me too?”

“What?”

I could barely make out Yoongi’s expression under the pitch-black sky, but I could tell that he must be feeling insecure based on how small his voice was when he was asking that question. Did he really think that I was suggesting that he’s the one who I was tired of? I wanted to laugh because it’s just too adorable for Yoongi to say something like that, but I held it in.

“No! If I was, then I would be avoiding you.”

“…Why are you so nice to me?” , he sniffed.

“What?”

“I’m never the one who initiates conversations, I don’t like hanging out like normal people do, and I’m a pessimistic person to be around.”

I could just feel Yoongi’s lack of self-confidence in himself. I wondered what he went through to make that his mind-set.

“I guess…because you understand me the best.”

Yoongi had no idea what I was trying to say. I blushed , as it’s embarrassing having to admit things to him. I wanted to hurry up and change the topic. I didn’t want to end up confessing that I liked talking to him because I could always share my deepest thoughts with him.

“S-since you’re being very talkative tonight, how about you answer me one thing?”

“What?”

“Why did you keep my poem? The one that had fallen out of my math's book that one time when it rained so hard.”

It took a while for Yoongi to recall what I was talking about, but eventually the memory came back to him.

“It’s not even good, and I just wrote that just because. You could’ve just ignored it or thrown it away.”

“…I couldn’t.”

He couldn’t? “Why?”

“…You put something into this world to nurture it, care for it, let it grow, so that the outcome would be that it can repeat the same cycle and inspire others,” Yoongi glances over to you. “I kept it because someone’s child should never be abandoned just because it didn’t turn out to what you wanted it to be. I’m sure if you give your poem a second shot, then it would blossom into something even more beautiful, and your work will inspire others to do so too.” The way Yoongi said that made it sound like he’d gone through the same experience. I never thought of it that way. The poems I wrote were all just a one-time thing that I threw away. I always had inspiration to write it, but then after writing it, I cringed and felt disgusted with the way it turned out, so I threw it away. What Yoongi said made me think differently of life. I couldn’t believe that someone with that view in life is so disliked by many at our school. He’s so beautiful in every way to me and it just upsets me to see that he was being undermined by so many people. He was making it so difficult for me to look away from him because he looked so mesmerizing.

“What do want from life Yoongi?”

Yoongi looked ahead at the beautifully lit town below and after a few moments of silence finally said “ peace… Mel… Peace and Happiness. I am tired of people shunning me for who I am Mel… And – and I want people to accept me the way I am.. Just like you Mel… I know I have never said this but you are truly my source of happiness Mel… I don’t know how life would have turned out if I never got to meet you…I wanna be a producer Mel….. I want to compose songs and pour my heart and soul into my passion for music. I want to make an Identity for myself Mel…I just don’t want to be a nobody”. I was stunned into silence at Yoongi's confession. And I realized, however cold he might appear on the outside, Yoongi was immaculately vulnerable on the inside just like any other human. And yet he was treated as an outcast in the society. His dreams, hopes and aspirations were as natural as any other human being. And yet Yoongi was disliked by many. He wanted to be loved, to be heard out just like any other normal teen. So that Moment, I made a decision. No matter what, I would never leave him; I would hold his hands tight and lead him through. And at that moment I also realized one more thing. I had fallen in love with Yoongi and I had fallen in love with him so hard that there was no way I could ever get up ; it was now only a matter of drowning deeper and deeper.

I scooted closer to Yoongi and draped an arm around his shoulders yo make him feel more comfortable and secure. He flinched at the sudden touch but didn’t push me away. We stared at one another for a few moments and then carefully, very carefully I asked him, “what ever happened to you …Yoongi…. In the past… .. You can share it with me you know… . I will never judge you, you know that… .. It will lessen the burden of your heart and … and moreover if you share your sorrows, you will feel some relief. Trust me… Yoongi… . It’s high time that you let go of all your sorrows and vulnerabilities… . It’s high time that you experience just happiness…A person like you deserves only happiness Yoongi….only happiness….” Yoongi curled into himself even more. He was scared that he might be ridiculed if he shared his horrible secrets. I was ready to get out right rejected but Yoongi let out a low scoff with underlying bitterness. “You really wanna see Philomel?.... See then!...”.The utterance of my full name from Yoongi's mouth made me go stiff. As I stared at him with a blank expression, unable to fathom head or tail of what he was going to show me, I saw Yoongi roll up the sleeves of his overcoat and jumper simultaneously. It was dark, but even then I could faintly see his pale Skin littered with innumerable scars. Each scar, as if ,told a different story. My mind suddenly went blank. I couldn’t form words, as I just stared at the scars with wide eyes . I lifted a shaking hand to gently caress one large scar. I now realized why he always chose o wear full sleeved shirts. I couldn’t even fathom the pain that sugar must have gone through. Each wound inflicted on him must have taken away a part of his happiness, a part of innocence. My eyes brimmed with tears. Yoongi looked at me and then looked ahead blankly, “ My father is the reason I am like this today. He was a monster Mel… A brutal cruel monster. Have you ever wondered what it feels like to nearly die?.... I felt that..”

I looked up at him wide eyed, as a tear slipped through my eye.

“Do you know that as a seven year old my father forced me to drink Bourbon. He said I would be a sissy if I didn’t drink. He forced me to drink four glasses of Bourbon and when I puked after that, he beat me up so hard that I fainted. I couldn’t see out of my right eye for nearly two weeks after the incident.”

“ He never worked.. He was always at home, drinking bottle after bottle of whiskey. He was either completely drunk to care about what was going on or completely insane when not drunk. He hated mom and me with a passion. When I was five, I vaguely remember my mom being pregnant with my sibling. But one night , in an ensuing chaos, my dad being dead drunk and my mom too tired to deal with his tantrums,…my mom ended up losing the unborn child. She never told me what happened that night and I was too young to remember…. But whatever happened was extremely unfortunate and I strongly believe that it was solely because of my dad… The incident left a deep mark on my mom and she almost lost her sanity…. But I believe looking at my face, she must’ve pulled herself together.”

“After the Bourbon incident, I somewhat grew up mentally, almost overnight. My mother had already started working several odd jobs to financially support our family as well as my education. Every night my dad came home from the bar, dead drunk and took out his anger and frustrations on me.. To save my mom, I often used to lock her up in the bathroom…. I felt pathetic doing that but at least she wasn’t harmed that way…” “ My father never forgot to mention that I was An unwanted child. Do you know many of these scars are cigarette burns , that he inflicted on me so that I would never forget how unwanted I was. He would purposely inflict wound on my hands so that I wouldn’t resist him. At the end of the day I used to be so tired that I barely had the courage to resist him… so I just submitted… . And eventually when he got tired of abusing me, he would just kick me and retire for the night as if he was done with his day’s job…”

“ He died when I was nine. I shouldn’t be saying this, but it was a great relief. He drowned us in debt and my mother had to sell her jewellery, and give up what little savings she had. We eventually sold the house and my grandparents were extremely kind to take us back. They had been residents of spring Hill for nearly three and half decades …. . The piano that I play, was my Nana’s. She had it shifted to the attic because she couldn’t play it anymore due to old age… But seeing me so gloomy and sad, she had it relocated to my room ….She was the one who introduced me to the piano for the first time…. When Nana passed away, that piano became my everything, my life and soul…” “ Ever since then, we have been in Spring Hill, My mom and I… . Although I have no friends here, but at least my mom is at peace… I am happy seeing her happy and peaceful… .” , a quiet tear slipped from his eye… “ You are my one true friend Mel.. The reason why I smile and laugh much more these days is because of you… . I don’t knowhow to say this , but… thanks… thanks Mel for just never giving up on me…” . Yoongi looked up at me with eyes full of longing.

I thanked my stars that it was dark around in here… because I would have been truly embarrassed if Yoongi had seen with puffy red eyes , red nose and a fountain of snot. I slowly linked my arm with his and rested my head on his shoulder. I truly had no words for consoling him or comforting him… My words couldn’t wipe away his years of misery.

The Church bells rang loudly from the beautiful dreamy town below. The faint sound of the choir could be heard echoing in a distance. It was Christmas, which meant it was already past midnight. We both were so immersed in one another that we didn’t even realize how quickly time passed by.. .. “Merry Christmas, Yoongi… !!!!” I quietly wished him and as I gazed up at the winter sky full of stars, I secretly wished and prayed for all the happiness in the world for him. Yoongi too wished me a solemn “ Merry Christmas, Mel!!..” , and wrapped his arm around me protectively. In that cold winter night, I could feel warmth on my cheeks and butterflies in the pit of my stomach and I could swear Yoongi felt the same too.

After spending a few quiet moments together, Yoongi and I walked home hand in hand… There were still a lot of people outside attending the midnight mass for Christmas… It was snowing… soft snowflakes were strewing the streets.. Yoongi dropped me off at my place and I noticed he was somewhat hesitant to leave, almost as if he wanted to say something. I gave him a soft smile and gestured for him to tell me whatever was there in his mind. Yoongi bit his lower lip nervously and muttered, “ I don’t have anything to give you as a Christmas gift, Mel…. But… .” , and before I could say a word, I felt his soft lips on mine.. I froze on spot. The kiss was in no way rushed. It was soft, sweet and Yoongi took his own sweet time molding his soft lips into mine. Before I could even process what was going on, I felt myself reciprocate the kiss. It was desperate, almost hinting on urgency. Yoongi responded to my kiss immediately, whatever thoughts in his mind flooded out as he felt my lips soft on his. His tongue gently sought entrance over my bottom lip, his large palm pressed to the back of my neck. He pressed in closer to me, caging me in with his body as he deepened the kiss , longer, reveling in the tiny moan that I let out as he pulled away to kiss over the tender slope of my Cupid’s bow.

Yoongi felt Philomel shiver, and one of the things he probably loved most about her, it’s what hooked him in the first place – is how he could read her like an open book. How he knew when he pressed his lips like a stamp to her beautiful Cupid’s bow, she would shiver, her body curling and her arms tightening around him. That same warm feeling was back in his chest again, it felt like it was about to devour him , sinking through him slowly and softly, and he smiled at her, his beautiful, precious, ethereal gummy smile. Pulling her into his arms, he wrapped himself around her and hugged her close, his breathing still erratic, and words and syllables tumbling around in his head. All he could really focus on was this damn feeling – like the sun itself was trapped in his chest. He hugged her closer, buried his face in her neck, and sealed her skin with a kiss. There, in the privacy of just the two of them, both of them engulfed in a warm tight hug, he smiled, and suddenly had the odd feeling like he might cry. He tried to coax a couple words out, but he was too scared to say what he was really thinking. Instead he held her close and felt like she might melt into his arms, relaxed completely as her breathing, airy and needy, finally slowed down. After a breath, Yoongi finally disentangled himself enough to scan over her.

He felt Philomel's palms slip up to rest against his chest, her right hand directly over his heart. That feeling returned to him with a jolt, and made him catch his breath and he kissed her again, slow and long and deep. The two of them just breathed, and Yoongi finally spoke, voice low and throaty and a little uncertain. “I’m all yours, y’know that… you’ve got me.” He was a little scared to say the words, of feeling whatever it was that was wrecking through his chest and head and heart right then. But then he saw a smile slowly unfurl over her face, and she nodded ,“You’ve got me too.” Yoongi hugged her tight once again.

I felt like time had stopped forever.. When we finally disentangled from each other, I looked at Yoongi with glossy eyes, his hands still securely wrapped around my waist. I just couldn’t control myself anymore. I didn’t care about the consequences… at that moment I just wanted to tell him everything that I had on my mind. “I love you, Yoongi! I… just please don’t push me away anymore… I really ..really love you so much!!!”

Yoongi shushed me gently, further pulling me closer to his warm body and resting his forehead on mine. “I know Mel.. I know… I love you too… love you so, so much… . I have loved you for a really long time now… it’s just that I am too bad at expressing my feelings… !”, he chuckled softly, warm breath tingling on my face. We disentangled from each other for real this time and after a beat of comfortable silence, Yoongi suddenly blurted out, “Ohhh !!! Look!!! We kissed under a mistletoe!!!” , he looked up with awe and pointed out at the mistletoe hanging as a decoration on the front door of my house. We both smiled brightly at each other as the atmosphere visibly lightened with the continuous fall of soft snowflakes around us and melodic ringing of the Church bells. Yoongi pulled me closer wrapping an arm around my waist and softly kissing my nose, “ Merry Christmas Mel! …. But I don’t know If I’ll get any sleep at all tonight… he smirked sarcastically and pondered. “Same pinch!” I retorted pinching his cute button nose and smiling brightly up at him.

EPILOGUE

One year later… 

“Min Yoongi!!!” , I barged into his room. He was busy scribbling something on a piece of paper, probably composing music , completely focused , tongue sticking out cutely and a gentle frown forming on his forehead.. He nearly jumped out of his chair and suffered a mini heart attack at my sudden grand entrance. He deadpanned me but I grinned a toothy grin and handed him over a poster. He gave me a questioning look and then proceeded to carefully read the poster.

THE 20 TH LA MELODICA INTERNATIONAL MUSIC COMPETITION

FOR AMATEUR MUSICIANS AND ARTISTS .

ANYONE WITH A DEEP PASSION FOR MUSIC OR ANYONE COLLABORATING WITH ANY MUSICAL ART FORM OF THEIR CHOICE COULD APPLY

THEME : FANTASIES

WINNING PRIZE OF 2000 DOLLARS

ALBUM RECORDING WITH A WORLDWIDE DISTRIBUTION WITH HYMN ENTERTAINMENT

A CONCERT FOR THE WINNER WILL BE ORGANIZED EXCLUSIVELY IN PARIS.

Yoongi read the poster carefully, once, twice.. Then thrice. He then looked up at me and hesitantly asked, “ You think I’ll be able to do it?”… “I don’t think so… I know so.. I believe in you Yoongsta… Only you can do it… Trust me.. This is one big fat opportunity Yoongi, don’t let it slip away from your hands. Show all those people who shunned you, what you’ve got.. Show them all what you’re capable of… . Trust me Yoongi, just give it a try… you  can do it…” I cupped his cheeks and smiled at him warmly. “I guess then I would have to give it a try… . Huh?”, he secured his arms around my waist tightly and kissed my forehead lovingly.

“Go get them , tiger!”