The Great Indian Tamasha

The young techie was on the road and in a cheerful mood. It was an important day for him at the office. He had to make a presentation on a month-long project he was working on to his bosses and the client. Should the project be approved by the client he would be heading the team. Implying additional pay and incentives at the end of the year long project. His next dream was to graduate to a car. He had had enough of the back breaking drives on the pot hole ridden roads of the city. Then he could take his girl-friend for a drive in the car. The city they call it a silicon-valley but actually a shitty valley for so many reasons.

The reader would have rightly guessed that the city that the techie lived was none other than Bangalore. It was one of those happening places and for a techie the right place to be in. While the business environment was great the living environment as the techie was thinking was indeed sub-standard. In that sense it was nothing exceptional. Most Indian cities were not very different from Bangalore. Every city had its share of woes. The silver lining in Bangalore was the pleasant weather. But the older citizens would say even that weather was increasingly becoming hotter. Twenty-thirty years back it was a pensioners’ paradise. Not anymore.

If an alien were to land on the city roads the alien would wonder if it had landed on the moon for the crater like surface. The High Court of Bangalore had sometime back had castigated the municipal commissioner for the state of pot holes in the city. Some enterprising citizens conducted a puja for the ‘pothole amman.’ Another citizen groups started cultivating paddy in the potholes in their vicinity. As an astrophysicist would describe the potholes were like blackholes. Any amount of expenditure (by and estimate of CM not less than Rs 20,000 crores in the preceding five years or more) just disappeared into this blackhole.

The techie was day dreaming as he rode the bike to his office. He had shaved, slapped some gel on to his hair, dabbed some cologne and he looked pleased with his looks that morning so much so that his mother did a drishti to ward off the evil eye. He didn’t want to wear the helmet that day and spoil the looks of his gelled hair. He did not know Lord Yama (God of death) was waiting hidden behind the pothole like Rama did for claiming Vali’s life. The techie missed the pothole in his dreamy state and got over thrown and fell headlong. For a few minutes many swanky cars and buses passed by. Nobody batted an eyelid at the bleeding body left on the road. Who would get involved in a police case? It was left to the much-maligned auto driver who with the help of some passer by lifted the bleeding body on to the auto and driven to the nearest public hospital. It was too late by then. The techie was declared dead. Someone fished out his purse and found a phone number. His parents got the call and they rushed to the hospital. One among them left the hospital to file a FIR against the callous municipality for leaving the pothole unrepaired. As soon as the news reached the sub-engineer ordered the contractor to patch up the pot hole in a jiffy.

As an insurance claim was made the claim inspector on a contract with the insurance company came to investigate. His incentives are paid manifold if he can provide good grounds for claim rejection. He was happy to note that the techie had not worn a helmet. His delight increased even further when the constable informed that his license had expired. It was not clear if the techie had initiated online process to renew the license. The claim inspector at once filed the report to the company and expected a good incentive for the report.

His boss at the office was really sad to learn of the incident. He made the presentation instead of the techie and the client approved it. He granted an ex-gratia payment of a few lakhs to the grieving parents in a good will gesture. This turned out to be the only redeeming feature in this whole episode.

His current girl friend got a shock of her life when she received the news two days later. She had a pub and dance date with the techie on the following Friday. His ex-girl friends did not bat an eye lid upon hearing the news. They had moved on with new boy-friends. That much how the so-called Indian culture had changed. Blame it on western influence. Valentine day was celebrated much more by the youth than Navratri. The current political atmosphere that promoted reverting back to the past was largely at incongruence with the youth of the city.

“So great Kind Vikramaditya” called out the betaal “who is at fault with for the death of the Techie?” Vikramadaitya protested loudly. “It isn’t fair,” said he. “You are giving cases that is fitting for a full bench of justices. Or at the least the cases could be presented in the August class rooms of premier management institutions. In my times one had never heard of any pothole causing deaths. I can only offer a preliminary reading of the case situation. It is as follows:

Obviously, the techie was at fault for not wearing the helmet. It is a matter of no dispute that wearing of helmet has nothing to do with road conditions. At the least we would not have a death in hand. Now in so far as pot holes are concerned the conclusion can be a complex one. To me pot holes are manifestation of corruption. How did corruption seep so much like cancer in the country? One has to blame the country’s first PM. I am one with the present PM in that. How hard the present PM had tried to eliminate corruption. He brought in demonetisation with his noble intention. He can’t be faulted for that. One needs to investigate into the system of awarding of contract to patch up pot-holes. Why does every body want to make money in this country? Why there is lack of accountability? Why do citizens continue to accept karma for all their woes? Is being deep rooted in religion and God good for the nation? How has Rama and Sita’s ideal of one man-one women change into a dating and jump into bed-culture in the country?

Betaal understood Vikramaditya’s lament and with sympathy said “Oh! Great king, I now understand the reason for your protest. This is no ordinary case. Probably the Chief Justice of India when he finds time has to take up the case and allot a 5-judge panel to deal with the case with all its ramifications. In the meantime, if you are willing let us pay our respects to the departed soul on earth and make arrangement to welcome him amidst us.

Vikramaditya with a sigh of relief agreed with the suggestion.

PS: The techie’s funeral got done as per tradition and the budget the parents could afford. The insurance claim got rejected and the claim inspector was duly awarded. The FIR report was collecting dust. The mother had gone into a depression. It was her only son. The father had taken vigorously into prayers and parikrama’s. The present girl-friend found another techie to hang around with. The great Indian tamasha continues unabated.

By the time the SC had taken up the pot -hole case pendency of cases had reached one hundred thousand in Supreme court alone. The top brains in the country were seen to be arguing. A summary is presented below:

Potholes are a great deterrent against population explosion.

Considering vehicular congestion on the roads pot holes provide additional deterrent against private transportation.

It makes a strong case in favour of public transportation. Considering our condition of buses in that they cannot go beyond 20 km speed pot holes ensure that this speed remains the optimum in city conditions.

In general, a slowing down of life is needed as is seen in slow-food movement catching up in restaurants and eating styles. Potholes are synchronous with that life style.

Potholes patching up provide all year around employment for the urban poor.

Pothole deaths have no religious bias and uphold secularity.

Potholes affect all and hence provide a level-playing field for citizens of all class.

Potholes are like Gods in that they both are eternal. So is corruption, went the counter argument.