Should've Known

I swear, I feel like I should've known something wasn't right, but I couldn't see the forest for the trees, and by the time I'm looking around you are gone. In the blink of an eye, at the drop of a hat, my whole entire life fell apart, and I wasn't sure if I'd make it through that first year. With hind sight being 20/20, I cannot get over the fact that I feel like I should've known I was going to lose you. Even if only through divorce. Nothing seems real anymore. I feel like I'm going to wake up from the worst nightmare, and you will still be here with me. Yet, I still haven't gotten you back. Maybe one of these days I can stop wondering, "What Might've Been", but that is very unlikely. It still baffles my brain that you are gone. And, as well, I'm quite upset because you didn't take me with you. You promised that we'd grow and gray together, but it looks like I'm the only one who will be getting old between the two of us.

I love you more than you will ever know, Jeremy.