How Do You Know?

(We all cry at some point while searching for the meaning of our life)

My grandma used to tell me, "Beware of the walls, They listen to you talking all the time and pretend that they never heard you". I never got that saying until one day, when I was in the bath. 

CHAPTER 1

According to a survey, 69% of the world's population goes through a horrible past trauma, Just like me. And the most similar thing between me and 69% of the whole world was this little thing, I too used to cry at night or while taking a shower.

A normal day in my life starts with me waking up from my alarm on which my name is craved "Ivy", after that rushing to make a cup of coffee, and opening my computer. well my PC was quite good-looking but old So it take 1-2 minutes to boot and run perfectly, till then I used to fill up my Caliburns pod (A type of vape which contains 35-50mg nicotine flavour.) And you can bet I was a nicotine addict. Usually, my every day and the whole day ends with watching K- dramas or reading a book. If you are wondering that am I unemployed then the simple answer is "No" but yes I have quite bad luck, A college student should be going to college regularly but not in my case, why? Because I'm in an open university And that for sure sucks.

CHAPTER 2

Moving on in my life you will find that there are days and months when I stay broke that automatically leads me to anxieties and worries Of course, I need some damn money to buy Caliburn flavours. That day after a long time it feels like my heart is sinking deep in my blood, Guilt is spreading all over me, and I'm drowning in anxiety. I want to cry, shout, lie in the bed, and sleep for a long long time where no one can wake me up until I want to, But I guess a place like this never exists. So the best alternative that I can think of at that moment is a bath.

 CHAPTER 3

"Mom I going to take a bath" I heard myself saying to mom.

"Okay Ivy"

Okay, it's the best word that can go with a fake smile and can fool the smartest person in the world.

I took big steps toward the bathroom so that my tears don't have to wait any longer.

CHAPTER 4

 It was a beautiful day and it had to be a beautiful day when I cried. I was asking all these questions to myself, You know all that common questions that we all ask from our own selves, like why me? what did I ever do wrong?, Stuff like that until I saw a familiar face looking at me. When I looked at her she said I know why are you crying. I didn't say a word but I did murmur "How the hell do you know what I'm feeling right now or what I'm going through at this moment". 

CHAPTER 5

I hate eye contact. I really hate them because my eyes do speak things that I want to hide the most. And when I encounter her, the girl who jumped up from somewhere when I was in my most depressing phase, Believe me, all she did was looked right in my eye and spoke some weird words. That's it. But something was damn unearthly though she was purely human, something that took my life out from me for a moment. 

CHAPTER 6

 Fear, like other negative emotions, can trigger our anger.

Fear...I was scared at that moment.

"How the hell do you know what I'm feeling right now or what I'm going through at this moment". She murmured 5-8 words too that were inaudible as I exclaim. "Are you scared because you don't have friends?, Are you in pain because of your past, or perhaps is it your future that worries you?" She asked me. I tried to find curiousness on her face but I couldn't. It seems like she knows a hell of me that I even don't know.

I want to say yes they are some of the reasons why I'm miserable but I didn't. It's not like I don't dare to say them but I tried to say yes it's just my tongue swallowing the words back to my heart.

She was still looking into my red eyes. All I can say after looking at her eye was, that there was hope, light, and shine in there. "You don't have to worry, you will have a really good future, will have loyal friends and about the past, that won't bother you anymore." Said she, in a calm voice.

"How can you say that? How do you know?" These were the only words I can say, I can ask a stranger with a familiar face. 

There are stories of loss, darkness, and destruction but then there are always stories of hope, light, and recovery waiting to be told. This is the first thing that pops into my head, I read this quote in a book called stories we never tell.

The next thing that she said left me shattered into pieces, I found her no stranger, I know who she was. 

CHAPTER 7 

She was one of those teachers who used to call me a failure, She was my parents who never felt proud of their daughter, She was my friend who used to bully me and she was the guy who betrayed me.

"How can you say that? How do you know?" These were the only words I can say, I can ask a stranger with a familiar face. 

"Well, A failure doesn't have the right to ask."

"Pardon?"

"A failure doesn't have the right to ask," she repeated. 

"When you get steps ahead from failure, I'll answer your question," This was the last line she said.

After that day we met every day but never said or heard a word from each other. Whenever we encounter she looks me in those eyes and we both exchange a smile each other and walk by. 

CHAPTER 8

It's been a lustrum, I don't care about my past or friends. I have so many loyal fans and a bright future. But I'm curious, really curious to know who was she. So I went to pay a visit to her. On my arrival at the same place where we always met, I found her standing there in a dress as same as mine. Seems like she was waiting for me. 

We both smiled looking at each other eyes (happiness, that is all I can see in her eyes. )

I asked her " .. how do you ...--?"

"Ivy people outside are waiting for you, Stop wasting your time standing in front of the mirror " Mom shouted at me.

"Yes mom, coming"

I heard her saying "Let's go people are waiting for us"

And I left the side of the mirror.