Past….

I always remember of the past I cry

The things I had that was done why

I don’t understand why I can’t forget or let go

So I can move on and enjoy the future show

 

There clingy to me like leech to a body sometimes

Once they are full of blood the erased with time

But that mark or scar remain to haut new day

The past may be gone but it memories are hiding till today

 

From the time that I was born their action has predicted my today

I feel the little bit of pinch in whatever I do or say

Like blood sucking mosquitoes they so familiar

Time and time they seem to re-appear, I stuck in time with that fear

 

There nothing that can withdraw these from me,

 I am clouded with my own that discouraging be bitterly

Whether it parents, that loves now they don’t

Or the trust they have and now hesitation distrust prone

 

The horrifying words the echo sometimes

The nightmare of being a worthless sings chores in rhymes

From dread thing that are now filled inside my head

I wish there some way to clear that thing when I sleep in bed

 

Sometime I wish insomnia was my friend to me

So that sleep would not come ever to be

I keep working like non-stop clock

Sometime take break to the washroom or be out for walk

 

Just continue to write the thing that comes in my head

They fill up libraries with thousands of pages instead

From every moment every sec capture in words and rhymes

All you know that I write poems that are sing song and rhyme

 

Hear the snore of the crowds that sleep near by

Thing of the dreams of their wicked fantasy as it comes alive

There are experiences that good ones that I have know

That each about the things I should do, in better way is known

 

Learn thing that confined in space of this mind

I have learnt a lot in hard way and bad times

Sometime when the answers seem just about to appear

Life changes the question in just flip and disappear

 

Sometime I wonder is life to even taken seriously

About the timeless wonder that it can bring to enlighten thee

I always believe in fantasy of the oblivion of unknown

Thinking of the vacuum that sometime the mind prone

 

The attractions of the choices earlier made

Some have to chances to turn again mended it to better ways

But of the emptiness that now within me

It has finished everything that I thought I would rather be

 

The love of my own has now become disgusted and turns to rage

There was chapters that has cleared and made new page

Now everything I write will be new instead of old

The Old is churned from time and pressure into memories cold

 

Loneliness, silence, and shadow my new name

I will hide from everyone be nothing, but still have fame

The value of Zero is know n by the few

I learnt it the hard way, so will others too?

 

I first felt what life I will have if alone I will be

I won’t anyone to prove or fight for a competition seriously

In my own world, web of truth I built

I would die as silk worm, giving the precious silk