Fake A Smile :)

Everybody wants to take control, 

Everybody wants to see me feel alive.

I swear I am trying so hard,

 So hard to fake that perfect smile. 

 

Everybody thinks I have no clue, 

No clue how to live a content life.

But trust me I do;

It's just isn't in my hands right now,

Right now I don't know what to do.

If it was in my hands I would, 

I would try not to fake a smile.

If it was in my hands I'll smile, 

I'll smile an un-fake smile. 

I see all these people around me, 

Around me living their life.

I want to feel alive too, 

I just don't wanna fake a smile. 

I wish someone understood, 

How hard it is for me.

For me to wear a smile all day, 

All-day trying to be okay. 

I wish there was someone,

Someone by my side.

When I felt like giving up, 

Giving up on my life. 

How do I tell them it feels impossible, 

Impossible to fake a smile anymore. 

How do I tell them that I truly need, 

Need someone to ask me how I feel. 

I wish I had the will, 

The will to wake up every day. 

I swear I am not lazy, 

Not lazy just really drained. 

How do I tell you I hold my tears, 

Hold them when you assume I am a brat. 

How do I tell you I need help, 

Help to not feel shitty like that. 

How do I tell God I am lost,

Lost in these idiotic daydreams. 

Daydreams of a happy life, 

Life with a happiness guide. 

I know all of this is temporary, 

But I can't take it anymore. 

No more I can fake a smile, 

I just wanna feel that happiness for a while!