Expectations

If this is a test

Then I’m failing miserably

Only time will tell

If I can fulfill the destiny

That has been laid out before me

Expectations are climbing higher

With discipline

I know that I can fulfill them

But that’s it

This discipline

Will I find my will?

Being ordinary seems easier

But my heart won’t let me settle for it

My soul craves to be extraordinary

Because it can see

That it has the capacity

But the path is filled with grief and frustration

This isn’t a new revelation

There are so many dependents

Counting on me

So many watching closely

I need to act carefully

Further, it remains to be seen

How I let this affect me

The world outside is brimming with opportunity

My heart yearns to use it successfully

But I'm restricted

Not infinitely

It’s only temporary

But looking at all the possibilities,

It’s heart-wrenching to hold myself back

The words “hard work”

Keep churning in my mind

A constant reminder

Words that I now live by

But keep getting ignored

Why is it this hard to push myself

And jump in completely?

Sometimes I feel like things

Come somewhat easily to me

Unjust rewards

Undeserved

Disproportionate to my efforts

People only see the result

And not the process

People, they don’t see the truth

Instead, they see images of grandeur, wealth and happiness

They see excellence and perfection

Where none exist

Life is not a fairy-tale always

Let me show them the true picture

What they see are only aspirations

Ideals of how I want to be

Oh! I wish what they say is true

But I don’t wish for them to say such things

Even if they were true.