Sight

"I always dreamt about this moment but I can feel clouds of fear are forming over my mind. It's not that I'm not happy for her but what if her expectations were high. I mean what if when she opens her eyes and she didn't want to see a black guy who's only 5'6? What if her imagination of me is someone more fair and handsome than me? What if her smile fades away when she sees me?" All these thoughts are killing me, I told myself, I should better run from her and I got up.

"Who is Antony?"

"It's me."

"Patient wants to see you."

I went to see her as I know she can only see me tomorrow morning at 10 o' clock and till that time I can stand before her with full confidence.

"Hey, How is everything, do you need anything?"

"Nothing, I can't sleep. I just wanted someone besides me."

" Ohh...fine...I will...I will call and ask your sister to come soon."

"No need, I feel better when you are near me." She then held my hand and placed it in centre of her chest and tried to look my face. She pulled me close and asked, "Will you love me tomorrow as you love me today."

I thought I know I will but the question is will you and I told her "I will, sweetheart and what makes you think I won't."

"I don't know, Antony. From the day of operation, I feel that you are moving away from me or someone is dragging you from me. I fear that you won't be the same as you are to me now, after tomorrow."

"Come on, why do you think this way? I will always love you."

"Then promise me one thing. You will be the first person I will see tomorrow."

I wish that I could saw say yes but something is stopping me, maybe it's that fear. But as always, I hide my feelings and promised her "I will." Now she slept peacefully. I removed my hand from her hold and moved out from there.

I came out of the hospital and lighted my cigarette. As my dopamine was relaxing me, previous thoughts again struck me. I went for the second one and went back to the hospital. I sat on the sofa and made myself comfortable.

A few minutes later I felt someone was padding me. I opened my eyes and saw an old man with a cowboy hat. "Will you give me some space, son?"

"Ohh...grandpa.. sorry I went."

"Please, don't call me grandpa, call me Dev. I'm not that old, you know."

I made a funny smile and asked him, "ok Dev, why are you here."

"My wife is admitted and nothing serious, she had a small accident. What about you, Mr...?

"Antony, Antony Wilson... My...My.. My girl will get her sight tomorrow."

"That's big news and congrats"

"Thanks"

"Is there any problem, son"

I really don't know why. But I felt like I can say what's going in my mind to this strange old man. I told him everything. He said, "come with me". He took outside and lighted a cigarette. Offered me too. I took my own cigarette.

"Son, you see this". He showed me his left leg, which was artificial. "When I was young, I rode a bike. Better to say I raced. During one such race, I met with an accident and the doctor told me he needed to cut my leg. I said better you kill me. My girl was standing beside me and slapped me. She told everyone to go out and sat beside me. She held my hands and cried. She was my heart, you know. If she cries, my heart bleeds. So I agreed. Now I May not have leg but I have her. We lived sixty years together and not once I regretted about my legs. Instead, someday I feel lucky that I have only one leg."

He lighted another cigarette and said "I think, you are getting what I'm saying, son. True love happens once. If you let it go due to fear and some stupid thoughts, You will regret this entire life."

"Antony, Antony, Antony" her sister was calling and everything was fading away and the cigarette was still burning.

I went unconscious and when I open my eyes, I was lying on the sofa.

Ester's sister said, "it's almost ten. Ester said she wants to see you first".

My mind said don't go but my heart wanted to see her eyes. I went and her eyes were open. My fear was at its peak and my heart was beating like a beast is chasing me. She looked at me. She smiled and her eyes filled with tears. She didn't look anyone else or anywhere else. She stuck her look to me and "Antony, my honey, You look the same I imagined".