Of Winks And Whispers

Today when I look back,

I can't help but wonder;

Would I have been able to crack,

The mother-daughter bond, with all my blunders!

Mercifully, just in time,

I learnt to be a parent who 'listens';

Became their partner in 'crime';

In all their quirky and adventurous missions!

Now my daughters and I'

Have an unsaid understanding;

I don't in their life choices pry,

Which has undeniably strengthened our bonding!

Dearest daughters

I read this quote the other day, "Someday when the pages of my life end, I know you will be one of the most beautiful chapters", and thought of you three, my precious girls!

 

I am neither from generation X, Y Z nor from the millennials of today. We are the sixties children, who were raised on the daily dose of "Because I say so!" The freedom of questioning our parents' decisions concerning everything and especially us, was never ever there. We had to conform and do what they thought was right for us. "We know what is best for you", were the words we grew up with. "What will people think?" guided our parents thinking throughout our growing up years.

When we became parents ourselves, most of us had to unlearn the rules of parenting that we had unknowingly imbibed from our parents. "Change is the only constant", was just a quote for our parents, but you and your generation taught us its real meaning. You made us understand that the world is changing and we need to change with it too.

You girls taught me to hear your 'voice'; to understand that age-old dictums and traditions of the past can be tweaked a little to suit the need of the hour. O my eldest one, when your father wanted you to settle down at the 'right' time you taught me that if you are not convinced about something, it is better not to give in just to please others. You held on till you found your soul mate and did not buckle under pressure.

My middle adorable rebel, you always had to shout to be heard as you were sandwiched between the two. When we wanted you to play safe and hold on to your job as a bird in hand is worth two in the bush (what we had grown up hearing), you decided that it is not creatively satisfying and gave it up without any qualms. Preferring to sit at home without a job of your choice was something we could not fathom. But you persevered and displayed nerves of steel; today you have built a career on no compromises. You made me understand that if you dream big you can achieve it with determination.

What do I say of you, the youngest of the clan? You decided to follow your heart too, like your sisters and went to shores unseen to achieve your dream! Carving a career in the world of finance, in a milieu so different from what you were used to, you climbed the ladder of the corporate world on your own with no family to hold your hand, just in case. You undeniably made me realise that to go ahead in life, you have to be brave and courageous to tackle whatever comes your way and emerge on top.

You, my angels, each in your own way, chiselled away the dictums that we had grown up with and made me a parent who 'listens' and is attuned to their children's' voice .Today, if I share a bond with you which goes beyond the conventional mother-daughter relationship,I have to thank you for letting me learn as a parent, that it is important to be bold to explore the shores unknown, to live life unapologetically on our terms without worrying what will people say! And for this, my dear daughters, I am forever indebted to you as I now stand at the cusp of my sixties ready to take a solo flight into the unknown, but secure in the knowledge that you will be with me, unseen but urging me on to grab life with both my hands!

With my immense gratitude,

I am and will always be

Your Loving mother.