In You, I Found The New Me.

I stared at the clock above my head and it was, as if the time had stood still. The two needles that always moved in harmony had a fight and refused to leave their position. I waited and she told me there was still time. I cried with pain, waiting for this to end as fast as possible; I saw images of people beside me fading. I felt the sharp voices now getting softer and softer, and then, suddenly, there was this sharp wave of pain, a pain so strong that I knew I was going to die any moment now. Everything seemed to blur and then I heard a 'cry'. I felt tears trickling down my cheeks. I held you for the first time, and could see it all again.

It was a bright sunny morning and Amar had to leave early that day, owing to the unscheduled meeting that his boss had called for last night. Dressed in a simple pink dress, I picked up my bag, stuffed in my dupatta and hurried my way out struggling with the keys. He hated me going out bare chest without carrying a stole. But I, being the modern independent types, hated putting it on.

It was 11 o' clock now, and while I was waiting for my bus to arrive, there was a group of young girls standing next to me chattering about the boy who lived a few blocks away. From the talks I overheard, I could make out they were teasing someone, giggling all among themselves. Lost in their talks, I missed my bus. A few minutes later, the girls left and I was left all alone. As I was waiting for a taxi to reach my office, I saw him coming towards me. Dressed in a white shirt and a blue jeans he looked sober. He approached me and offered a lift. I refused. He insisted, saying he was going the same way, and I refused again. I could sense an anger in his voice now . I suddenly felt a strong jerk. He was trying to pull me in his car, and I could now feel the adrenaline rush inside me. I hit him hard with my bag and ran. Ran as hard as I could. Ran till I could use the last breath of life prevailing inside me. But, finally I fell. Within a few second he reached to me and now I could feel him on me..Pushing me hard, slapping my face, forcing himself into me and all I could do was cry. I shouted for help. I begged pardon but there was none to hear.

In evening, when Amar returned I told him everything, and all he could do was leave. He left, never to return and I was left to bear the agony all alone. A month later I learnt that I was pregnant and it was then, I decided that I was going to have you. Why should I feel the guilt of someone else's crime? Why should you die because a coward could not give you his name? Why should the innocents always reap what the monsters of this society have sown for them? And now as I hold you in my hands I make a promise to myself. You shall live a free life . You shall have everything you would dream for and you shall have a bright future no matter what.