Why I can't cry

Why I can't cry!

Does it mean I'm cold, but then why do I feel others' pain?

Does it mean I'm rude, but then why do I think before saying?

Does it means I'm vicious,?

But then why do I care for everyone's feelings?

I feel heavy like a stone,

Numb like a dead,

Empty like a dark room,

Alone like an orphan!

I need to cry, cry until I found myself,

Until my tears drown all my pain,

Until the vulnerable thoughts fade away,

Until I achieve salvation and become free.

Then I'll sleep without open eyes and running mind,

Then I'll laugh without a fake mask for the society,

Then I'll live without suffering...

With pride, with hope, with love and with the true self!