Love Letters or Suicide Notes

I wish I could tell you a lot of things.

But I always miss it when I talk with you.

Sometimes I write them in my notes and save them in a folder.

I have now more than three of such folders.

Yes I never showed them to you.

I wish we could see each other some time.

Like a stranger – a complete stranger.

But then I don’t want to disturb you anymore.

I don’t know who am I, what is it that I want, what will I do with my life.

I am scared almost every time.

I am a badly disturbed person.

And I can’t share it with anyone.

I love to pray often.

And there I pray for you – your smile.

It looks beautiful on your kind face.

Like a dew drop on the lips of rose.

I’m terribly romantic, you’d say.

Yes I am.

I want to run away sometimes.

I fear these sometimes are too often nowadays.

I wish I could disappear like smoke.

Days pass cells are born then they die – we live

while inside we die every day, every moment,

every second.