Lost

The truth paralysed me

I was broken

An aphonic wave had hit

A woman always so outspoken.

I couldn’t sink in the thought

That I had done such a thing

It felt as if an eagle

Had lost its only wing.

Why didn’t I pick up the call?

Was that meeting so vital?

One call would have prevented

A loss which was fatal.

He wouldn’t have done that

I could have made him understand

I could have gone, hugged him tight

And put mine in his hand.

He was stressed, he was tired

He wanted to give up

Being busy, I ignored him

And asked him to shut up.

“Sorry my son” I want to tell him

Now that he is gone

I could not give him time

He was alone, forlorn.

The bitter reality pricks me

I can never see him again

He committed suicide

I could not feel his pain

No one’s there to call me “Mom”

No one’s there for whom I can toil

After all he was my SON

Even if my blood he did boil

I have been drowning in guilt

This situation is worse than death

I wasn’t even with my son

When he took his last breath

All I can do now

Is remember the few moments spent together

Look at our photos and just say

Sorry, I could not be a good Mother

Work, priorities have jailed us

We don’t have time for our dear ones

Jobs many can be got

But the lost moments can never be bought.